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No Children

Discussion in 'Tilted Life and Sexuality' started by Mysugarcane, Aug 27, 2012.

  1. Mysugarcane

    Mysugarcane Vertical

    I was wondering how many of you made the decision to NOT have kids? If you did, how have the people in your life handled it? I have found some people (family, friends and strangers) to be down right offended by my decision and I wonder why. I've even been called a coward. I joke about and say that I'm doing my part for the environment...think how much less waste my household produces. Plus I really do believe there are way to many of us on this planet.

    Also, if you care to share your reasons why you chose to remain childless, I would be interested to read that too. I thought at one time for me it was just too much of an emotional risk to take, but what I think it may have been the lack of control. I love kids (most kids), but I have never been one of those women who lose their minds around babies and say things like, "Oh god that baby is so cute, it makes my uterus hurt." The two times I had a bout of maternal desire, I got a puppy and that took care of it in spades. I guess I believe just because you can doesn't mean you should.

    Anyway, just thought I would put that out there for you guys and gals to ponder.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  2. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    *raises hand*

    I'm not vain enough to think that my particular roll-of-the-dice genetic material is so special that I need to further plunder the resources of this planet with yet another mouth to feed, ass to wipe and body to clothe. I think a lot of people that have children do it because they need a hobby, need something that says it loves them or because "that's what you do when you get married." I like kids. Someone has to have them. Just not me.

    Maybe people have kids because they don't want to die alone. I realize I'm going to die alone. And that's okay. Just prop me up under a tree.
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2012
    • Like Like x 4
  3. Mysugarcane

    Mysugarcane Vertical

    You wouldn't believe how many people use that argument..."Who is going to take care of you when you are old?" Seriously that's no reason to become a parent! That's like saying you have children so you don't have to do the dishes anymore. I would like to think that the relationships I cultivate throughout my life will yield a least one or two people who would be inclined to visit me from time to time in a seniors facility (if it comes to that) and be my advocate if I required one.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  4. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Yeah, I figure all the buckets of money I save on not having a kid will allow me to set myself up in a nice group dormitory where I can eat all the tapioca pudding I want and rewatch those ancient '80s action flicks in peace. Hopefully by the time I reach the age where my quality of life has descended into the dreary white dwarf phase the US will have developed a conscience and legalized assisted suicide so I can get rid of myself.
     
  5. Hektore

    Hektore Slightly Tilted

    I just wanted to say that I fully support Plan9's decision not to have children. [/tooeasy]
     
    • Like Like x 5
  6. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Hey, I wish you luck on paying for your kid's million dollar college education as I travel though Europe and retire to a cabin in the mountains.
     
  7. Hektore

    Hektore Slightly Tilted

    In all serious 9er, it was half tongue-in-cheek. The half that wasn't was meant as non-offensively as possible. I think it's cool that people don't want kids and are willing to follow through with it. Hell, if I'm being totally honest, If I knew then, what I knew now, I definitely wouldn't have had my son when we did.

    That's not to say that I would take it back If I could, or even that I regret it. In many ways having my son is the best 'thing' I've ever done and I'm a much better person for it, but lordy, things could have certainly been better timed.

    I think having kids is like anything, living in the city vs. the country, what kind of dog you want. Now it's more important (an understatement if there ever was one) but it still falls well within the umbrella of 'because I wan to.' Or in your case, 'because I don't want to.'
     
  8. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Jesus, why does everybody think I'm being all serious? Are my avatars and custom user titles from the last five years not enough of a hint?

    ...

    Hey, I'm all for good people having kids. Hell, I think we should regulate reproduction to prevent Idiocracy. I was at a baby shower two weeks ago (hey, it as relatively friendly to those of us with testicles... lotsa pricey beer and a big deck to grunt on) and I told the lucky lady and her husband that it's important that classy, educated people have kids. In a world where morons like me shit out two kids for no reason other than boredom, it's nice to see useful people having kids with a purpose. I know that they'll be good parents, that the child will likely become a doctor or astronaut or something.
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2012
  9. Xerxes

    Xerxes Bulking.

    I don't want kids because I'm immature and I like Camaros.

    That might change, but given a choice between a living breathing camaro and a poop factory, I'll take the camaro.
     
  10. Hektore

    Hektore Slightly Tilted

    I was trying to flesh out my reply in relation to the op, I didn't actually think that I had hurt your feelings or anything. You know, trying to do something besides waste server space. Besides, I was always under the impression that 'offended' wasn't in the emotional range of anyone with a misfits t-shirt. But, if it will make you feel better, I'll never take your posts seriously again.
     
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2012
    • Like Like x 1
  11. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Stop being so serious about me being not serious when I'm not being serious.

    And why did you quote my entire post? The paragraph was... legit content.
     
  12. Xerxes

    Xerxes Bulking.

    LMAO, you sound just like my ex, it was always an extreeme end of the spectrum with her.
     
  13. Hektore

    Hektore Slightly Tilted

    Or you could stop being so serious about me being serious about me not being serious.

    Ok, that's probably about enough of this. On with your regularly scheduled thread.
     
  14. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    ...I'm disappointed at the lack of jokes about me going to a baby shower.
     
  15. Cwtch38

    Cwtch38 Bat Shit Crazy

    Location:
    Uk
    I've got kids, but I think they are overrated, Now I have come out the other side of child rearing to the part where they are adults-ish, I can look back on the last eighteen years and shudder, i was/am not maternal and shocked everyone who knew me that I was going to have a child.
    My sister in law does not want kids and I wholly support that idea as she would in her own opinion be a shit mother.
    I don't even like being around kids, and they always flock to me, it drives me insane.
    They say life begins at forty, mine is beginning at 38 :)
     
    • Like Like x 1
  16. cynthetiq

    cynthetiq Administrator Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    New York City
    Child free.

    That's been my intention since my wife and I started dating. My parents still from time to time think we will change our minds.

    I live in NYC. I want to live the city lifestyle which means going to the theater, dinner, art galleries, museums, everything that the city has to offer at the drop of a hat. Like tonight, I didn't plan on it, but we're going to finally see the Batman movie. No kids means I can do this quickly and efficiently without having to figure out where the babysitter fits in etc.

    We also travel quite a bit at the drop of a hat also.

    I don't want to give up that lifestyle.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  17. I'm still trying to decide.

    I'd like to leave *something* behind in this world for when I'm not in it anymore, but I feel like the world is over-populated and I don't know if I'm ever going to be responsible enough to handle raising a dog, much less a human.

    I'm 22. I have a few years to decide.
     
  18. Lucifer Slightly Tilted

    Location:
    The Darkside
    I'm not very patient with children and rather run the risk of being a poor father, I decided not to be one at all. My mother always said, "it'll be different when they're your own, you'll feel differently." But I always thought, "what if it's not?"
     
    • Like Like x 1
  19. PonyPotato

    PonyPotato Very Tilted

    Location:
    Columbus, OH
    For many years I thought I wouldn't have kids, but I've been changing my mind in the last five or so. The biggest influences have been dating a couple guys who would be great fathers (and want kids), as well as helping raise my nephew.

    Apparently, though, I still give off the vibe of "doesn't want kids." Most people assume this about me unless told otherwise. I'm not exactly sure why, either.
     
  20. snowy

    snowy so kawaii Staff Member

    I want kids...someday. I like my current lifestyle a lot and would feel irresponsible bringing a child into it. I have a feeling that will change eventually, especially once we've started our careers.
     
    • Like Like x 1