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StephenSa · 03-08-2004, 12:27 PM

Hopefully this is the right forum for this, if not feel free to move, no biggee. Anyhoo, I have a wonderful sexy beautiful girl to whom I am engaged. I love her dearly, the sex is awesome and we have a lot of fun together. There is one snag. My dearest is a little over weight. I would not say she is fat but yes, she could lose a few pounds. I used to be fat. I was very overweight. Quite rotund. With a lot of effort I lost all my weight and now spend a lot of time in the gym. I lift weights and am trim and muscular. Because of this and the usual reasons my SO is a bit self-concious about her weight and appearance. She has started calling herself fat and says she wants to lose weight. I have replied to her by saying she looks great and I love her. I have continually told her that I think she is sexy and get excited just looking at her. Still she continually talks about being fat and wanting to lose weight and told me not to tell her she is thin because she is not. Here is where I obviously screwed up. I finally had enough of hearing about it so when she started going on about her weight and appearance the other night I told her "Yes dear, honestly I wouldn't mind if you lost a few pounds but I love you as you are so its no big deal to me." This was translated to " I think you are fat and disgusting, you better get skinny pronto you piggee!" Understand, part of my weight gain problem was that people kept telling me I looked great as I gained weight and it was easier to believe them than getting off my butt and doing something about it. I wish people had been honest with me and I might have done something sooner. I believe a little honesty can be motivating. I avoided this with my SO for a while but finally just said what I said. So now she thinks I think she is a pig and the problem is just worse. The other night I rolled over to go to sleep instead of initiating sex, (I was VERY tired) and she started crying because she thought I didn't want her because of her weight. SHEESH! She is by no means fat, and I don't know what to do to make her feel better. Any ideas would be appreciated.

03-08-2004, 12:27 PM	#1 (permalink)
StephenSa Psycho Location: Dallas, Texas	I swear, I did NOT call my fiance' fat! Hopefully this is the right forum for this, if not feel free to move, no biggee. Anyhoo, I have a wonderful sexy beautiful girl to whom I am engaged. I love her dearly, the sex is awesome and we have a lot of fun together. There is one snag. My dearest is a little over weight. I would not say she is fat but yes, she could lose a few pounds. I used to be fat. I was very overweight. Quite rotund. With a lot of effort I lost all my weight and now spend a lot of time in the gym. I lift weights and am trim and muscular. Because of this and the usual reasons my SO is a bit self-concious about her weight and appearance. She has started calling herself fat and says she wants to lose weight. I have replied to her by saying she looks great and I love her. I have continually told her that I think she is sexy and get excited just looking at her. Still she continually talks about being fat and wanting to lose weight and told me not to tell her she is thin because she is not. Here is where I obviously screwed up. I finally had enough of hearing about it so when she started going on about her weight and appearance the other night I told her "Yes dear, honestly I wouldn't mind if you lost a few pounds but I love you as you are so its no big deal to me." This was translated to " I think you are fat and disgusting, you better get skinny pronto you piggee!" Understand, part of my weight gain problem was that people kept telling me I looked great as I gained weight and it was easier to believe them than getting off my butt and doing something about it. I wish people had been honest with me and I might have done something sooner. I believe a little honesty can be motivating. I avoided this with my SO for a while but finally just said what I said. So now she thinks I think she is a pig and the problem is just worse. The other night I rolled over to go to sleep instead of initiating sex, (I was VERY tired) and she started crying because she thought I didn't want her because of her weight. SHEESH! She is by no means fat, and I don't know what to do to make her feel better. Any ideas would be appreciated.