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its been long enough that i can't remember. there has been many situations where i've thought that i SHOULD be crying, but for whatever reason i've been unable to. i can remember times i've felt guilty because i didn't have the desire to cry.
when everybody around you is crying and your not, it somehow makes you feel less human, like your no longer a participant in life. when my best friend shot himself, i remember it being like that. i think that feeling is actually worse, than the feeling that caused it.
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