Smoking bad.. but one addiction at a time
Good for you for going two weeks, AA's creed is one day at a time,a nd sometimes it might very well be one hour or one minute at a time... Some days I'm sure will be easier than others... Don't spend your time alone if you can help it... that's when it would be the hardest.. go out - to a bookstore, find a club, find something you enjoy doing where drinking owuldn't be appropriate but being out would be..
I'm proud of you..
At AA, from the few meetings that I attended, you absolutely do not have to get up and speak unless you want to, you can go and sit and just listen, drink coffee and smoke cigarettes (ones i went to were not smoke free, dont know if that's changed) You might, after listening to people spill their guts, feel compelled to tell your story, or introduce yourself... it's a supportive and nurturing environment. they are there to help. and if public speaking causes you pain, then you don't have to do it...
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Originally Posted by Johnny Pyro
Its been two weeks since my last drink. I feel like shit. Sometimes I feel ok, I forget about it, but other times I don't know what to do with myself. Its a bad feeling. I feel like I wanna jump out of my skin. Its horrible. I never felt like this before.
My pot smoking has gone down. I seem to get panic attacks from just one hit. So reality has a grip on me. I'm sober all the time now. Its very different. I must confess, I don't like it.
I contacted AA. I don't wanna go because I fear public speaking, but the crave for booze isn't getting better so maybe I'll confront my fear.
My smoking has increased. Two packs a day. It helps. The anxiety is killing me. I hope it goes away. I need a drink really, really, bad. 
So, its friday night, I'm by myself, not drinking, completely sober, smoking like a chimney, thinking, posting, and hating it. |