well, i also think that for us it depends on the situation...
if it's the rough, angry, horny, i wana fuck you right now so i dont care kinda sex ( that we had on sunday
) then thats exactly what you do.
if its kissy kissy, touchy, feely, i wana make love to you right now, i wana hold you while i tell you that I love you while we're being as intimate as two people can possibly be kinda sex, then thats what you do.