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Funny Terms for Masturbation

Discussion in 'Tilted Life and Sexuality' started by EventHorizon, Oct 9, 2011.

Page 1 of 5
  1. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
    I've heard some really creative ones that have had me tearing up from laughing so hard. At the moment my favorite is "strangling the bishop" or "personal excellence time." A little background on the second one: usually there is some sort of training scheduled after all 4000 something of us entitlement generation brats finish eating our 1984 lunch. If there isn't any training that day, the daily email with the schedule on it will just say "personal excellence" at which point internet speeds will plummet for that one spare hour before class starts again and people will generally seem nicer all day.

    How about it TFP, are there any inside jokes in your life in reference to autoeroticism? Best/worst getting caught stories?
     
    EventHorizon, Oct 9, 2011
    #1
  2. Bear Cub

    Bear Cub Goes down smooth.

    Location:
    At the bar, eyeing the pretty one.
    Shucking the flesh cob.
     
    Bear Cub, Oct 9, 2011
    #2
  3. Charlatan

    Charlatan sous les pavés, la plage

    Location:
    Temasek
    Hand shandy
     
    Charlatan, Oct 9, 2011
    #3
  4. Craven Morehead

    Craven Morehead Very Tilted

    Location:
    third rock from the sun
    Rubbing one out
     
    Craven Morehead, Oct 9, 2011
    #4
  5. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Tilted Politics
     
    Plan9, Oct 9, 2011
    #5
    • Like Like x 10
  6. Lordeden

    Lordeden Part of the Problem

    Location:
    Redneckhell, NC
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Also, Debating Religion.

    *****

    Flogging the Bishop.
     
    Lordeden, Oct 9, 2011
    #6
  7. Fly

    Fly music is the answer

    Location:
    Beautiful British Columbia
    spankin' the monkey

    jerkin' the johnson

    pullin' yer pud
     
    Fly, Oct 9, 2011
    #7
  8. Craven Morehead

    Craven Morehead Very Tilted

    Location:
    third rock from the sun
    Choking the chicken
     
    Craven Morehead, Oct 9, 2011
    #8
  9. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
    Having a date with Palmela Handerson or Jill
     
    EventHorizon, Oct 9, 2011
    #9
    • Like Like x 1
  10. Lindy

    Lindy Moderator Staff Member

    Location:
    Nebraska
    Time to enjoy a little clit clickin'

    self rationalization...
    (rationalization is like masturbation, the only one your fucking is yourself)

    Lindy
     
    Lindy, Oct 9, 2011
    #10
    • Like Like x 2
  11. grumpyolddude

    grumpyolddude Very Tilted

    Location:
    Metro Detroit, Michigan, USA
    Around here it was "Dating Miss Michigan."
     
    grumpyolddude, Oct 9, 2011
    #11
  12. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    Capturing the clown
     
    the_jazz, Oct 9, 2011
    #12
    • Like Like x 1
  13. fflowley

    fflowley Don't just do something, stand there!

    Rosie Palmer and her 5 sisters always cracked me up.
     
    fflowley, Oct 9, 2011
    #13
  14. MeltedMetalGlob

    MeltedMetalGlob Resident Loser Donor

    Location:
    Who cares, really?
    Shakin' hands with Abraham Lincoln.
     
    MeltedMetalGlob, Oct 9, 2011
    #14
    • Like Like x 1
  15. Python

    Python Getting Tilted

    Location:
    Land of the Vikings
    Slapping the salami.
    Rubbing one out.
     
    Python, Oct 10, 2011
    #15
  16. cj2112

    cj2112 Slightly Tilted

    Tickling the Elmo
     
    cj2112, Oct 10, 2011
    #16
  17. CHINESE CRESTED

    chinese crested Slightly Tilted

    chinese crested, Oct 10, 2011
    #17
  18. Levite

    Levite Levitical Yet Funky

    Location:
    The Windy City
    Wringing out the lizard
    Strangling the snake
    Wrecking the weasel
    Tugging the mugger
    Giving yourself a hand-hug
    Squeezing out some man-sap
     
    Levite, Oct 10, 2011
    #18
  19. Random McRandom

    Random McRandom Starry Eyed

    Killin' Babies.
     
    Random McRandom, Oct 10, 2011
    #19
    • Like Like x 2
  20. Fly

    Fly music is the answer

    Location:
    Beautiful British Columbia
    my favorite 3 girlfriends are....

    Palmela

    Handula

    and.....

    Wristina
     
    Fly, Oct 10, 2011
    #20
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