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The Last Person To Post Wins The Interweb - NSFW

Discussion in 'uncle phil's Posting Games' started by uncle phil, Aug 1, 2011.

  1. BadNick

    BadNick Getting Tilted

    Location:
    PA's on U SofA
    No, but thanks for asking.
     
  2. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
  3. uncle phil

    uncle phil Moderator Emeritus (and sorely missed) Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    pasco county
    ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
    WITNESS: No...
    ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
    WITNESS: No.
    ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
    WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
    ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
    WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.


    [​IMG]
     
  4. Devoid

    Devoid New Member

    I should ask the blonde if she wants to stand on my hose.
     
  5. uncle phil

    uncle phil Moderator Emeritus (and sorely missed) Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    pasco county
    I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get- one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said 'buy one-get one free.' 'They're already buy-one- get-one-free, ' she said, 'so I guess they're both free'. She handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.


    [​IMG]
     
  6. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
    wait, phil, are you serious about that story?
     
  7. BadNick

    BadNick Getting Tilted

    Location:
    PA's on U SofA
    I love gullible young service people.
     
  8. uncle phil

    uncle phil Moderator Emeritus (and sorely missed) Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    pasco county

    One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, 'Look at that dead bird!'


    Someone looked up at the sky and said, 'Where?'
    [​IMG]
     
  9. ralphie250

    ralphie250 Fully Erect Donor

    Location:
    At work..
  10. DrSublime

    DrSublime New Member

    Location:
    Phoenix, AZ
    I can haz intirwebz?

    Sent from my PC36100 using Tapatalk
     
  11. EyeSeePeeDude

    EyeSeePeeDude Getting Tilted

    Location:
    Nellis AFB
    No, I can haz them...
     
  12. BadNick

    BadNick Getting Tilted

    Location:
    PA's on U SofA
    you hadz them but now you dontz
     
  13. uncle phil

    uncle phil Moderator Emeritus (and sorely missed) Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    pasco county
    While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning.

    She asked, 'Does the sun rise in the North?
    When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, 'Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff.'

    [​IMG]
     
  14. ralphie250

    ralphie250 Fully Erect Donor

    Location:
    At work..
  15. EyeSeePeeDude

    EyeSeePeeDude Getting Tilted

    Location:
    Nellis AFB
    But I thought I won this already?

    /locks thread/
     
  16. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
  17. EventHorizon

    EventHorizon assuredly the cause of the angry Economy..

    Location:
    FREEDOM!
  18. Fremen

    Fremen Allright, who stole my mustache?

    Location:
    E. Texas
    So, we meat again?
     
  19. EyeSeePeeDude

    EyeSeePeeDude Getting Tilted

    Location:
    Nellis AFB
    Rawrz - minez
     
  20. uncle phil

    uncle phil Moderator Emeritus (and sorely missed) Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    pasco county
    I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center.

    One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open.
    I told him, 'The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.'
    He responded, 'Is that Eastern or Pacific time?'
    Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, 'Uh, Pacific.'

    [​IMG]