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Old 09-25-2008, 09:26 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Now this is a rant

but is it real?

To the Guy I met at the bar last night




Quote:
To the Guy I met at the bar last night (west)
Reply to: pers-854952148@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2008-09-25, 2:23PM EDT


I was the tall blonde with the nice rack, tight jeans and oh so tan body. You bought me drinks all night long. After the bar closed, we went back to my place for more drinks. After many many drinks we headed back to my bedroom where we started kissing and fondling each other. I even allowed you to get into my panties. I explained to you that I wasn't willing to go " all the way" after just meeting you. Your exact words were " thats ok, we can just lay here and cuddle" i thought that was some of the sweetest words I had ever heard. Little did I know about the ASSHOLE inside you.
I woke up to the birds chirping but couldn't open my right eye, and you were gone. I went and looked in the mirror and saw DRIED EJACULATE on my face and in my eyelashes. I also found it on my breadspread and headboard. You disgusting pig, no it dosent end there. I went to thebathroom to wash your filth off and found that not only had you jacked off in my face while I was asleep, but you also took a SHIT on my bathroom floor.
What kind of peice of shit jacks off on someone when they are sleeping and then shits on the floor. I finally got your mess cleaned up and took a long hot shower, and went into my kitchen to make some coffee. There I find you took the entire 12 pack I bought last night along with a fifth of Patron....So lets recap what happened.
I fell asleep thinking this guy was so sweet and was going to have sex with him in the morning, to waking up with dried cum on my face, in my hair, eyes, on my headboard, etc.. and walking into my bathroom to find a turd coiled up on the floor like a snake ready to attack, and to top it all off, you took all the beer and a fifth of $55.00 patron out of my fridge....
FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!
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Old 09-25-2008, 09:34 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Well, I can't say I feel much sympathy for this woman. She got herself drunk, she refused to be responsible and control her alcohol intake, and now she has the gall to be angered because the a total stranger happened to jerk off on her face?

Hopefully she learns from this. Can't say I feel sorry for her.
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Old 09-26-2008, 08:50 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I've posted stupid shit like that on Craigslist when I was bored. I doubt it's real.
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Old 09-26-2008, 02:52 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by MSD View Post
I've posted stupid shit like that on Craigslist when I was bored. I doubt it's real.
What an interesting hobby...
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Old 09-26-2008, 03:02 PM   #5 (permalink)
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its real dude. i was that guy...it was me

but i didnt mean to get it in her hair..im sorry about that
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Old 09-26-2008, 03:24 PM   #6 (permalink)
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If she were smart, she'd report it and turn over the dna evidence to the police.
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Old 09-26-2008, 03:33 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dlish View Post
its real dude. i was that guy...it was me

but i didnt mean to get it in her hair..im sorry about that
I was gonna say. It sounds a lot like someone I know.
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Old 09-26-2008, 04:13 PM   #8 (permalink)
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What is it about girls getting cum in their hair? Shoot all you want over their backs, stomachs, faces, arms, legs, breasts, but never the hair. Doesn't it wash right out from there too? And we do all take showers after sex, right? More confusion.
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Old 09-26-2008, 04:17 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I can see getting upset about it. On your skin it just...wipes off. In your hair it's all gross!

Um...I know this cause...
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Old 09-26-2008, 09:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Suddenly shaving down there makes sense. Although being the gentlemen I am I'd be happy to assist in the cleanup. Or in the shaving. Hell, come all over my hair girls, I don't mind. I like hair in my mouth.
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Old 09-27-2008, 12:33 AM   #11 (permalink)
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read my signature halx
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