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Old 04-23-2008, 09:24 AM   #1 (permalink)
Living in a Warmer Insanity
 
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Hold on to your junk boys...

My days been a little down but when I read this I thought "well, at least no one trying to steal my cock...


KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.

Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.

Rumors of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.

Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure.

"You just have to be accused of that, and people come after you. We've had a number of attempted lynchings. ... You see them covered in marks after being beaten," Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, told Reuters on Tuesday.

Police arrested the accused sorcerers and their victims in an effort to avoid the sort of bloodshed seen in Ghana a decade ago, when 12 suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death by angry mobs. The 27 men have since been released.

"I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," Oleko said.

"But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it'," he said. Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members.

"It's real. Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim. We saw. What was left was tiny," said 29-year-old Alain Kalala, who sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:30 AM   #2 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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There aren't enough witches in the world, baby.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:35 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Allow me to say that if I had access to Youtube at work, I'd be posting the scene from "Monty Python & The Holy Grail" about witches along with the scene from "The Princess Bride" that ends with "I'm not a witch; I'm your wife."

I thought of it first, just got aced out by work rules. So there.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:36 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Old 04-23-2008, 10:03 AM   #5 (permalink)
Living in a Warmer Insanity
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Jazz
Allow me to say that if I had access to Youtube at work, I'd be posting the scene from "Monty Python & The Holy Grail" about witches along with the scene from "The Princess Bride" that ends with "I'm not a witch; I'm your wife."

I thought of it first, just got aced out by work rules. So there.
Hadn't even thought of that, but yeah that sure fits.
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Old 04-23-2008, 10:47 AM   #6 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
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The Congo. heh, that's one crazy place.
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Old 04-23-2008, 11:59 AM   #7 (permalink)
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These people must lead really boring lives if lynching penis snatchers is a favored past time
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Old 04-23-2008, 02:37 PM   #8 (permalink)
Master Thief. Master Criminal. Masturbator.
 
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shit!

they're on to me!
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Old 04-23-2008, 02:40 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Goes to show that hysteria can make people believe anything.
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Old 04-23-2008, 02:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
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It's not just the Congo: Penis Panic is everywhere!!!

See Koro in SE Asia.

Last edited by sapiens; 04-23-2008 at 02:47 PM..
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Old 04-23-2008, 03:25 PM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tully Mars
..with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.

the curse of the married man!
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Old 04-23-2008, 03:36 PM   #12 (permalink)
peekaboo
 
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Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members.
Why this cracked me up, I have no idea....
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Old 04-23-2008, 04:25 PM   #13 (permalink)
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ng, it's the use of the term "members". "Members".











penis
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Old 04-23-2008, 05:50 PM   #14 (permalink)
Let's put a smile on that face
 
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You know Jazz I didn't even catch that, but now that you point it out thats all I keep seeing!
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Old 04-23-2008, 06:15 PM   #15 (permalink)
peekaboo
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Jazz
ng, it's the use of the term "members". "Members".











penis

Well, yea.....not sure if they wanted theirs cracked down on either...
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Old 04-23-2008, 08:53 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly
Goes to show that hysteria can make people believe anything.
Or a strong belief in something.
I had a young woman as a patient a few years ago who came in with a variety of complaints, none of which we could ID with any tests. When one of her aunts came in, she told us that a local voodoo practitioner had put a hex on her. We got a local priest from her community in to speak with her and after a couple hours, she felt normal again and went home.
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Old 04-23-2008, 08:55 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ngdawg
Well, yea.....not sure if they wanted theirs cracked down on either...
That made my penis shrink a little.
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Old 04-23-2008, 09:17 PM   #18 (permalink)
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"Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear . . . "

In The Hamptons, we prefer, "I was in the pool! I was in the pool!"
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Old 04-24-2008, 10:38 AM   #19 (permalink)
Forming
 
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My penis and I are very glad we're not in the Kongo.
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Old 04-24-2008, 11:03 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I like the sound of penis snatching but I don't like what it means here.
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Old 04-25-2008, 08:25 AM   #21 (permalink)
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penis shrinkage? isnt that something u get after you dive in a pool?

anyone seen the seinfeld episode?
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Old 04-25-2008, 08:35 AM   #22 (permalink)
Here
 
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I'm gonna use this excuse next time I can't keep it up during sex.



"Honey, I swear... some dude touched my on the subway and now my penis doesn't work."
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Old 05-03-2008, 08:26 PM   #23 (permalink)
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TNB
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Old 05-03-2008, 08:29 PM   #24 (permalink)
Please touch this.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly
Goes to show that hysteria can make people believe anything.
Even that god exists.
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