Bill O'Rights

My wife has complained for years, that I am extremely difficult to buy presents for. Every year, I gush over some useless object that we both know is going to sit at the bottom of my toolbox or dresser drawer. I tend to get what I need, or what I want (within reason) as I need or want it. This leaves Mrs. O'Rights in the position of never knowing what to get me for a present.

This year, I have intentionally held off on buying the new Dan Brown novel, The Lost Symbol, more as a present for her, to be able to actually buy me a present, than anything else. But, now she wants to know what else I want. I don't know. This is our dance every Christmas, birthday, Father's Day...what have you. She asks, I shrug, she gets crabby and buys me crap. My fault. I know. I just honestly do not know what I want.

So, I appeal to you, oh wise member's of the TFP. Many of you know me well. Any ideas? What should my wife get me for Christmas?

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"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.

Cynthetiq

painted wooden sign that reads, "Get Off My Lawn!"

fly fishing book?

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I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.

ShaniFaye

Me?

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I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!

Glory's Sun

a big box of redhead porn?

The_Jazz

A donation to TFP in your name?

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"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo

Willravel

Electronics:
Acer 23" LCD
iPhone
Logitech Z2300 computer speakers

Clothing:
Teach the controversy t-shirts
No brainer
This ostentatious sweater

Iliftrocks

Ask for a get out of trouble for free coupon. Or tell her you got all you wanted when she took the O'Right name. I'd go for the coupon

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bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."

Daniel_

Can I have that too? You square it with Mrs Daniel...

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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine
╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝

wooÐs

An aquarium.

Reese

I was thinking a DVD boxset of Alysson Hannigan the vampire slayer..

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“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry

LoganSnake

Spa day!

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Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques

highthief

Nose and ear hair trimmer.

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Si vis pacem parabellum.

dlish

army fatigues so you can re-live those younger days

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An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy

Grancey

Red's sister. But that would have to be cleared with Red's sister's mister.

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Quiet, mild-mannered souls might just turn out to be roaring lions of two-fisted cool.

Plan9

How about a former paratrooper that doubles as a kitchen garbage disposal?

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Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."

Fremen

I suggest Alyson Hannigan's autographed and framed photograph.

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Google

paddyjoe

Seriously Bill, she can't go wrong with this: