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Old 12-07-2009, 11:05 AM   #1 (permalink)
will always be an Alyson Hanniganite
Bill O'Rights's Avatar
Location: In the dust of the archives
Help my wife get me a Christmas present.

My wife has complained for years, that I am extremely difficult to buy presents for. Every year, I gush over some useless object that we both know is going to sit at the bottom of my toolbox or dresser drawer. I tend to get what I need, or what I want (within reason) as I need or want it. This leaves Mrs. O'Rights in the position of never knowing what to get me for a present.

This year, I have intentionally held off on buying the new Dan Brown novel, The Lost Symbol, more as a present for her, to be able to actually buy me a present, than anything else. But, now she wants to know what else I want. I don't know. This is our dance every Christmas, birthday, Father's Day...what have you. She asks, I shrug, she gets crabby and buys me crap. My fault. I know. I just honestly do not know what I want.

So, I appeal to you, oh wise member's of the TFP. Many of you know me well. Any ideas? What should my wife get me for Christmas?
"I distrust those people who know so well what God wants them to do because I notice it always coincides with their own desires." - Susan B. Anthony

"Hedonism with rules isn't hedonism at all, it's the Republican party." - JumpinJesus

It is indisputable that true beauty lies within...but a nice rack sure doesn't hurt.
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Old 12-07-2009, 11:09 AM   #2 (permalink)
Tilted Cat Head
Cynthetiq's Avatar
Location: Manhattan, NY
painted wooden sign that reads, "Get Off My Lawn!"

fly fishing book?
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.
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Old 12-07-2009, 11:10 AM   #3 (permalink)
Submit to me, you know you want to
ShaniFaye's Avatar
Location: Lilburn, Ga
I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!
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Old 12-07-2009, 11:11 AM   #4 (permalink)
Registered User
a big box of redhead porn?
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Old 12-07-2009, 11:16 AM   #5 (permalink)
The_Jazz's Avatar
Location: Chicago
A donation to TFP in your name?
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo
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Old 12-07-2009, 12:03 PM   #6 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
Willravel's Avatar
Acer 23" LCD
Logitech Z2300 computer speakers

Teach the controversy t-shirts
No brainer
This ostentatious sweater
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Old 12-07-2009, 12:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
Iliftrocks's Avatar
Location: Near Raleigh, NC
Ask for a get out of trouble for free coupon. Or tell her you got all you wanted when she took the O'Right name. I'd go for the coupon
bill hicks - "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out."
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Old 12-07-2009, 01:01 PM   #8 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
Daniel_'s Avatar
Location: Southern England
Originally Posted by ShaniFaye View Post
Can I have that too? You square it with Mrs Daniel...
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

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Old 12-07-2009, 02:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
Sitting in a tree
Location: Atlanta
An aquarium.
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Old 12-07-2009, 04:27 PM   #10 (permalink)
Reese's Avatar
Originally Posted by guccilvr View Post
a big box of redhead porn?
I was thinking a DVD boxset of Alysson Hannigan the vampire slayer..
“It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry
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Old 12-07-2009, 04:42 PM   #11 (permalink)
We work alone
LoganSnake's Avatar
Location: Cake Town
Spa day!
Maturity is knowing you were an idiot in the past. Wisdom is knowing that you'll be an idiot in the future. Common sense is knowing that you should try not to be an idiot now. - J. Jacques
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Old 12-07-2009, 06:09 PM   #12 (permalink)
highthief's Avatar
Location: Ontario, Canada
Nose and ear hair trimmer.
Si vis pacem parabellum.
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Old 12-07-2009, 06:29 PM   #13 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
dlish's Avatar
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
army fatigues so you can re-live those younger days
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
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Old 12-07-2009, 08:35 PM   #14 (permalink)
Life's short, gotta hurry...
Grancey's Avatar
Location: land of pit vipers
Red's sister. But that would have to be cleared with Red's sister's mister.
Quiet, mild-mannered souls might just turn out to be roaring lions of two-fisted cool.
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Old 12-07-2009, 08:43 PM   #15 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
Plan9's Avatar
How about a former paratrooper that doubles as a kitchen garbage disposal?
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
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Old 12-08-2009, 01:37 AM   #16 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
Fremen's Avatar
Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
I suggest Alyson Hannigan's autographed and framed photograph.
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Old 12-08-2009, 04:34 AM   #17 (permalink)
through charlatans phone
paddyjoe's Avatar
Location: Northcoast
Seriously Bill, she can't go wrong with this:

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cristmas, present, wife

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