Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > General Discussion


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 11-02-2010, 08:33 AM   #1 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
The "No Shit, I Just Saw..." Thread

This thread is dedicated to things that make you stop doing whatever you're doing and marvel over the weird and/or stupid thing that just happened right in front of you.

I'll start:

It's dark. I was walking to the chow tent. I heard a weird whirring noise behind me on the gravel. I turned around to see what it was and was almost sideswiped by some army douchette in full combat equipment (with a rifle slung) hauling ass on an electric-powered pink Razor scooter complete with red LED tail light. Let's just set aside that I'm not on some college campus and think about how some GI Joe gets away with having a pink scooter.

Military sure ain't what it used to be. Back in my day (last weekend) we used to walk.

Anybody else see something recently that struck them as way too Ren & Stimpy?
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 11-02-2010, 08:36 AM   #2 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: bedford, tx
the other morning on my way to work, I had some moped rider pass me by while i'm on my Intruder 1400 and this guy had more decked out chrome on his moped than I did on my Intruder.
__________________
"no amount of force can control a free man, a man whose mind is free. No, not the rack, not fission bombs, not anything. You cannot conquer a free man; the most you can do is kill him."
dksuddeth is offline  
Old 11-02-2010, 11:22 AM   #3 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Wes Mantooth's Avatar
 
Location: Tennessee
No shit, I just saw a rusted out, stripped down car on blocks being held together by some type of wooden bumpers sitting on the grass in front of my local polling place. People were just walking around it, young kids were playing on it...the worst part is that we were voting at the local elementary school...sure it was out by the road and well away from the school kids but still.
__________________
“My god I must have missed it...its hell down here!”
Wes Mantooth is offline  
Old 11-02-2010, 11:54 AM   #4 (permalink)
Une petite chou
 
noodle's Avatar
 
Location: With All Your Base
No shit, this morning I saw a homemade bicycle roof rack made out of lumber that extended well past the front and rear windshields and had the "bar" over the wheel, also made out of wood. It was held on by two tow-ropes and there was a plastic bag tied over the seat since it was trying to rain. Strange.
__________________
Here's how life works: you either get to ask for an apology or you get to shoot people. Not both. House

Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9
Just realize that you're armed with smart but heavily outnumbered.
The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me. Ayn Rand
noodle is offline  
Old 11-02-2010, 12:48 PM   #5 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
No shit. I'm REALLY constipated.


(b'dum tisch)

I thank you....
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
Daniel_ is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 03:44 AM   #6 (permalink)
Very Insignificant Pawn
 
Location: Amsterdam, NL
I hear you...and raise you two farts.

I saw a guy way over seven feet tall.
flat5 is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 02:05 PM   #7 (permalink)
Insane
 
RogueGypsy's Avatar
 
Location: The Great NorthWet
I've lived in Louisiana, the Capitol of No Shit. Those swampers are some creative individuals. But I think my biggest 'no shit' moment was filling up my truck at a local gas station (not in LA), when a 4 or 5 yo Asian kid steps out of a mini van at the pump next to me, whips out his pecker and takes a piss standing in the middle of the gas aisle. WTF? I seriously said to myself "No shit, did I really just see that".

My second most memorable was 4 wheeling over the Henry mountains in Southern Utah. I come around a corner and sitting in the crook of a tree on the side of the road is a Golden Lab about 8' off the ground, chewing on the leg bone of a cow, that was nearly as big as him. It was one of the most surreal things I've ever seen. The tree was growing out of the down hill side that dropped off steeply for about 300'. So the view was; Dog in tree suspended above 100 miles of desert and canyons. I was sure I'd just driven into a Dali painting.
__________________
Methods, application and intensity of application vary by the individual. All legal wavers must be signed before 'treatment' begins. Self 'Medicating' is not recommend. However, if necessary, it is best to have an 'assistant' or 'soft landing zone' nearby. Any and all legal issues resulting from improperly applied techniques should be forwarded to: Dewy, Cheatum & Howe, Intercourse, PA 17534. Attn: Anonymous.

Last edited by RogueGypsy; 11-03-2010 at 02:07 PM.. Reason: can't spell
RogueGypsy is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 02:10 PM   #8 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
mixedmedia's Avatar
 
Location: Florida
The last time the bf and I went to the strip club (a couple of weekends ago), he handed me something that he found tucked into the side of the padded chair in between us and said, 'look, I found a cigarette holder.'

And I said, 'that's not a cigarette holder, that's a crack pipe.'

And it was.
__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
mixedmedia is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 03:23 PM   #9 (permalink)
Life's short, gotta hurry...
 
Grancey's Avatar
 
Location: land of pit vipers
A couple of summers ago we were vacationing in the Outer Banks. One afternoon I was filming the waves and sea birds and happened to catch a funny scene of a guy with his dog which culminated in a woman burying her dog's poop in the sand. If you are interested in seeing it PM me, and I'll send you the link.
__________________
Quiet, mild-mannered souls might just turn out to be roaring lions of two-fisted cool.
Grancey is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 07:14 PM   #10 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by RogueGypsy View Post
My second most memorable was 4 wheeling over the Henry mountains in Southern Utah. I come around a corner and sitting in the crook of a tree on the side of the road is a Golden Lab about 8' off the ground, chewing on the leg bone of a cow, that was nearly as big as him. It was one of the most surreal things I've ever seen. The tree was growing out of the down hill side that dropped off steeply for about 300'. So the view was; Dog in tree suspended above 100 miles of desert and canyons. I was sure I'd just driven into a Dali painting.
Friggin' awesome.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 07:59 PM   #11 (permalink)
©
 
StanT's Avatar
 
Location: Colorado
A guy in a plaid, pleated skirt and gold lamé jacket riding a bicycle.

Ya, I was in Boulder; but that was weird even by Boulder standards.
StanT is offline  
Old 11-03-2010, 09:25 PM   #12 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Wes Mantooth's Avatar
 
Location: Tennessee
Out behind a bar just this evening I'm enjoying a smoke near the dumpsters, guy walks up next to me and lights a smoke, he looks over at me and says "won't be needing this anymore" reaches into his pants pulls out a condom and slings it against a brick wall...where it stuck. He pitches his smoke and goes back inside.

I meet the most awesome people on the face of Earth most nights.
__________________
“My god I must have missed it...its hell down here!”
Wes Mantooth is offline  
Old 11-04-2010, 03:21 AM   #13 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
mixedmedia's Avatar
 
Location: Florida
Quote:
Originally Posted by StanT View Post
A guy in a plaid, pleated skirt and gold lamé jacket riding a bicycle.

Ya, I was in Boulder; but that was weird even by Boulder standards.
This reminds me of a guy I saw walking down the sidewalk on Highway 41 here in Naples.

He was probably in his 60s. Skinny. Long stringy gray hair and beard. He was wearing sequined hot pants (shorts) and a tank top with a small leather vest over it. On his feet were medium height platform sandals. No make-up or other pretense at appearing feminine. Just this old guy in disco clothes. And what made him even more pleasant to see was the look of pure happiness and pride on his face as he strutted down the street. Like he just knew he was the hottest thing since sliced bread. It was pretty awesome. And you almost *never* see shit like that in Naples.

Then there was this guy in downtown Asheville, NC who came zipping around the corner on a tall, tricked out bicycle dressed in a nun's habit. That was surprising.

Phase II - Asheville by mixedmedia1965, on Flickr

__________________
Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Last edited by mixedmedia; 11-04-2010 at 06:24 AM.. Reason: I forgot I had a photo of him...
mixedmedia is offline  
Old 11-05-2010, 12:50 PM   #14 (permalink)
Tilted Cat Head
 
Cynthetiq's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Manhattan, NY
holy shit I just saw.....

a black on black Bentley Mulsanne
a white on white blade Audi R8
and an metallica beige Mercedes Benz SLS

all on the same road in Connecticut.
__________________
I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not.
Cynthetiq is offline  
 

Tags
shit, thread

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 07:37 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360