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Old 05-26-2004, 06:08 PM   #1 (permalink)
who ever said streaking was a bad thing?
streak_56's Avatar
Location: Calgary
men crying????

why is it that guys can't cry?.... a co-worker of mine broke his arm today and said he didn't want to cry cause he'd look like a pussy... but I was like wtf? you broke your arm... cry all you want.... I just want a reasonable explaination.... or is it not socially acceptable?
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:10 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Location: Manhattan, NY
i dunno. i cry plenty. pussy no. human being yes.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:16 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Chicago
Rules for men crying should be the same as women, cry because you broke your nail, you get taken out back and shot, cry because you got your hear broke, cry all you want to.

Some people I know cry at the drop of a hat, and to be honest, that gets a little annoying, they'll sit there and sob rather than deal with fixing the problem. Crying as a solution to a problem is not acceptable in my book. Crying because it seems like a good reaction to the immediate situation, is acceptable.

Break your arm? Shit that hurts. Cry. Go to the hospital and get your arm set. Cry. Get bill from hospital. Cry.

The only time I ever really cry is when I am just beyond frustrated.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:22 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Windy City
Most of the guys I know well enough to be around them in a situation where I would cry if in the situation have gotten teary in front of me. So could just be an issue with the individual person, whether they can express themselves that way.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:24 PM   #5 (permalink)
lonely rolling star
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Location: Seattle.

Men can, though.
"Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone.
The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.
-Lin Yutang

hearts, by d.a.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:25 PM   #6 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
Sounds like the guy was told early on it wasn't manly to cry.

I cry. It is a great stress reducer.
Sometimes I cry when I think of my late father.
Good movies and good books will get me to shed a few tears, too.
You can still be man and cry.
Go ahead, pull out a nose hair and have a cry.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:26 PM   #7 (permalink)
Location: i gotta go
I tried to cry last night because of reasons, and I just couldnt.
As if it were physically impossible or something.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:35 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: DC
Yeah, I can't do it. I get a little choked up, but quickly regain composure.

Even through my dad dying and my wedding, didn't cry.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:50 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Yonder
I cry. I cried this weekend.
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Old 05-26-2004, 06:52 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I have no problem showing my emotion. The last thing somebody would consider me is a pussy.

BTW, the physical stuff hasn't made me cry in decades ... despite going through some pretty painful circumstances. It's the emotional stuff that will get me. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten choked up watching my child grow.
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Old 05-26-2004, 07:05 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Location: Iowa City
I don't cry unless somebody dies. Last time I cried was when my grandma died. I cried when I heard the news, but not during the funeral or any time after that. This was the first time I'd cried in about 6 years.

I have a weakness for dogs and cats. When they die, I cry.

I don't cry for any other reason.
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Old 05-26-2004, 07:30 PM   #12 (permalink)
The Pusher
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Location: Edinburgh
Originally posted by BlingBling
BTW, the physical stuff hasn't made me cry in decades ... despite going through some pretty painful circumstances. It's the emotional stuff that will get me. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten choked up watching my child grow.
I'd agree with that. Physical stuff doesn't get me teary-eyed, just makes me yell pretty loudly. I'm not really an overly emotional person either but if it's something really bad (family member dying, breaking up with someone really important, etc.) then I'll get choked up.

And I know my male friends do that too, you can hear it in their voice if they talk about break ups.
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Old 05-26-2004, 07:40 PM   #13 (permalink)
A Real American
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There was an expirement a while back about crying where they removed tear glands from mice that had an injury. The control group healed normally and the tearless group in fact began to show degradaton of the wounds instead of healing.

My armchair theory is this is one of the reasons women outlive men. We have this stupid rule that we can't use a natural healing and stress reliever built into us, and when you do that you compound stress on yourself. So instead of relief your response is to stifle the response and make things even worse physically/emotionally.

If I feel I have to cry , I will. If that makes me a pussy then I'll just go fuck myself then.
I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince
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Old 05-26-2004, 07:46 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Location: In the land of ice and snow.
I cry whenever i can. I wasn't able to cry for a really long time and it made me feel like less of a man.
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Old 05-26-2004, 07:46 PM   #15 (permalink)
I don't see crying during physical pain to help, I usually yell or curse loudly during the inital impact of pain and after that tell myself to fix the problem and not cry or wollow in my own pain. I haven't had an emotional reason to merit tears in years so I don't know if I would or not. I am not opposed to crying, I just haven't done it in along time.
Old 05-26-2004, 07:59 PM   #16 (permalink)
The Northern Ward
Location: Columbus, Ohio
I see it as an inability to compose oneself.

For example say you're bum rushing Normandy beach. You can put your head beneath your legs and cry, and noone would blame you for it. If you're calm, collected and give confidence to others then you will be admired as a strong individual.

It's a choice between being human and being super human I guess. It's not surprising that most guys take the loaded-for-bear balls to the wall approach.
"I went shopping last night at like 1am. The place was empty and this old woman just making polite conversation said to me, 'where is everyone??' I replied, 'In bed, same place you and I should be!' Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look." --Some guy
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Old 05-26-2004, 08:04 PM   #17 (permalink)
pinche vato
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Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton
There's no crying in baseball.
Living is easy with eyes closed.
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Old 05-26-2004, 08:11 PM   #18 (permalink)
Location: uhhhh
I busted my femur a couple months back. That was the worst thing I have ever experienced, but it didn't occur to me to cry. Maybe it's the manly thing, or I just don't do it.
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Old 05-26-2004, 08:52 PM   #19 (permalink)
I don't want to go into detail as to why, but over the years I've become largely desensitized to any sort of emotion. There is very, very little out there that could ever make me cry, and unfortunately I express myself in ways that are physically unhealthy.
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Old 05-26-2004, 09:43 PM   #20 (permalink)
Leave me alone!
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Location: Alaska, USA
I can cry at the drop of a hat.
Back button again, I must be getting old.
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Old 05-26-2004, 10:20 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Location: Netherlands
Isn't 'the rule' that men can't cry in front of others? I know I don't like to cry in front of others and when I must I go seek solitude and cry alone.

Probably to do with the whole not being perceived as weak thing....
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Old 05-26-2004, 10:36 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Location: EH!?!?
I cry when I lose a really tough football game, when i tried my hardest.

I cried when i broke up with my last girlfriend, although im sure she wished i would have cried more...

i really dont cry that often
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Old 05-27-2004, 01:09 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: Belgium
I'll bust a little toe, sprain an ankle, break my arm, cut myself badly and not even crack. I'll yell and curse till I feel better though
I dunno, maybe it's a natural leftover from early times: you bust something, so you're probably in danger, first things first: gimme that adrenaline and get safe or solve the problem.

Emotional stuff though, that can get to a man, although interestingly, it does seem to come more easily when I'm alone.

Maybe conditioning, yeah, but I don't mind too much really.
Moderation should be moderately moderated.
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Old 05-27-2004, 01:28 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Location: Lookin for that above
Crying is ok

You call me Pussy , I'll cry the Shit out of you !
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Old 05-27-2004, 04:31 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Location: New England
Originally posted by sadistikdreams

Men can, though.
This is my favorite answer in this thread. I'll have to remember it as my son grows up (he's 20 months now).
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Old 05-27-2004, 04:41 AM   #26 (permalink)
Location: Denver
Physical pain rarely makes me cry. If it does it has to be a lot of pain. Plus, my pain tolerance is fairly high.
Emotional pain on the other hand....
Like my brother dying.
<--The great infidel-->
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Old 05-27-2004, 04:51 AM   #27 (permalink)
Location: RI
I cry, I cry because I know it's a bodily thing. Much as I pee because that's a bodily function. To me, it's something that needs to be done in some situations. Last time I shed a tear was this past weekend as we moved out of my apt. Got a bit misty out of that but my last good cry was when I had to give away my 3 ferrets.
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Old 05-27-2004, 05:36 AM   #28 (permalink)
Crying is for emotional stuff, not physical pain. For most I know anyway.
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Old 05-27-2004, 06:03 AM   #29 (permalink)
I cry like a baby at the end of watching "It's a Wonderful Life". Always.
Life's jounney is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn-out shouting, "Holy sh*t! What a ride!" - unknown
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Old 05-27-2004, 06:14 AM   #30 (permalink)
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Location: Upper Michigan
I don't know about men not crying. I've seen some men who cry all the time - almost more than some women I know.

My Dad cries easily. My mother doesn't. Not half as much anyway/ I can't even tell you how many times my Dad cried. Granted he has had emotional and depression problems for as long as I can remember. He cried for attention mostly. That's even what his psychiatrist in the psychiatric ward told us. He was an attention whore. He'd cry in church because I'd managed to convert a friend of mine. He'd cry at a B-day party because he was so happy that so many people were there just for him. He cried because MY bird died. I just was dry eyed and in shock. I suppose his crying prevented me from crying because as we buried my bird that I'd had for 7 years all I could think about is why is my Dad blubbering like that? He'd grab the kleenex box and sit there with my mom watching Skylark and sniffing and blubbering half way through it. It was embarressing in public when he'd cry over something that was simply touching. It was creepy when he'd blubber over a romantic movie while my brother and I looked at each other in confusion because neither one of us were crying but our parents were in GRIEF. Maybe at the time we just didn't understand the depth of some emotions because we hadn't had a lot of life experience. It was more than disconcerting as a kid with a Dad who was an attention whore and used crying half the time to get attention.

I wish my Dad didn't cry so much.
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Old 05-27-2004, 06:21 AM   #31 (permalink)
Location: the hills of aquafina.
Originally posted by Cynthetiq
i dunno. i cry plenty. pussy no. human being yes.
I've been accused of wearing my "heart on my sleeve", so I cry fairly easily, especially when I'm stressed out like I have been recently.

I don't ever cry at physical pain. That kind of pain simply doesn't induce crying. It's always emotions that do it to me.

for some reason, seeing my dad cry ALWAYS makes me tear up. Seeing my mom or anybody else cry not so much, but my dad...always. It's weird.
"The problem with quick and dirty, as some people have said, is that the dirty remains long after the quick has been forgotten" - Steve McConnell

Last edited by cartmen34; 05-27-2004 at 06:24 AM..
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Old 05-27-2004, 06:46 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Location: Oreegawn
I cry at emotional stuff, and i'm proud of it.

It's the physical stuff that doesn't make me cry anymore, in those situations, i think a good "FUCK! GODDAMMIT, THAT HURTS!!" actually makes for much better catharsis and release of pain than crying.
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Old 05-27-2004, 07:27 AM   #33 (permalink)
Location: Ontario, Canada
Pain hasn't made me cry since I was a kid, its just pain. It hurts and I get mad. A death, or heartbreak then I can get choked up. Been a long time since I've cried though.

Some people do it, some don't. I don't like seeing people cry, it makes me feel bad. I don't want anyone to be upset enough to cry. Perhaps that's why I don't cry, because I don't want to make other people feel like that. I dunno. It's just not a natural reaction for me I guess...
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Old 05-27-2004, 09:22 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Location: Eternity
I only cry over emotional pain. Crying because you broke your arm does make you kind of a pussy. I get angry when I cut myself or break a bone
The mother of mankind, what time his pride
Had cast him out from Heaven, with all his host
Of rebel Angels
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Old 05-27-2004, 12:55 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Location: Above you
There is a very simple reason as to why men don't cry and why men in general is against showing any emotion under most of our history.

And here it is;
It doesn't solve the problem!
Simple eh?
- "Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.."
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Old 05-27-2004, 12:59 PM   #36 (permalink)
Location: Massachusetts, USA
I cry when I want to. I know I'll still have a penis afterwards.
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Old 05-27-2004, 01:10 PM   #37 (permalink)
Comment or else!!
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Location: Home sweet home
Onions will get me crying plenty. Emotional stuff, can't say for sure, I've seen tons of sad movies and events that other people would sob like a baby and I just sit there dumbfounded..I guess you can say I'm emotionally dead. Not that I have a problem with crying, I don't, crying is just something I don't see myself doing it. Crying because of physical pain? Can't remember the last time I've done that. When I'm hurt, I groan, I grunt, I scream, yell, shout. Again, I don't have a problem with crying, I just don't do it.
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Old 05-27-2004, 01:23 PM   #38 (permalink)
Still fighting it.
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pain makes my eyes water, but not sob. emotional pain makes me cry, but it has to be pretty extreme.

also, the idea that i have disappointed someone with my actions makes me choke up, but i don't go over the edge.

the scariest thing of all was my mother had a cancer scare last year (everything is okay) but when i found out, i couldn't bring myself to cry. i felt like a complete cunt.

it was only when i went to visit her in hospital and thought about losing her i broke down.
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Old 05-27-2004, 01:58 PM   #39 (permalink)
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Location: Illinois
My husband never cries. Sometimes it really bothers me I would feel better if he did cry. I cry all the time and it makes me feel better. I wish he did to.
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Old 05-27-2004, 03:30 PM   #40 (permalink)
Location: Tennessee
i cry over weird shit..
like when my grandmother died i tried to cry but couldnt, yet whenever i listen to the cd that my ex made for me of her talking about shit that she wants me to remember about her and shit that she liked me about i ball my eyes out.
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crying, men

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