Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > Hall of Fame


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 12-12-2009, 04:28 AM   #1 (permalink)
Banned
 
wife cheating me? [aka - The Missing Condom Thread]

last night i counted and found one missed condom ,what does it mean?.i hav been married since last 1 yr,and i usually work in night sift,can i assume that she slept with another male
nice19761976 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 04:38 AM   #2 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
Or you miscounted?

Or she blew one up with the girls for a giggle?

Or she took one in her purse because she knows you want to fuck her behind the sofa at your mum's house?

Or....

Or....

Or.... just ask her?
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
Daniel_ is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 04:43 AM   #3 (permalink)
Banned
 
i m sure about number.i asked her,she said i dont know.
nice19761976 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:10 AM   #4 (permalink)
Asshole
 
The_Jazz's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Chicago
Do you trust your counting skills more than you trust your wife? Is it possible you made a mistake?
__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo
The_Jazz is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:27 AM   #5 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
 
dlish's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
is it possible that the pack contained one less condom?

or if your're really paranoid....maybe she's using condoms with you cos she's been sleeping around with someone else.

why are you counting condoms anways?
__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
dlish is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:33 AM   #6 (permalink)
Banned
 
in the pack there was 5 condom ,next day it was 4,hows that possible and wife saying she dont know abt this.
nice19761976 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:38 AM   #7 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
 
dlish's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
if it was a new unopened pack and she took the first one from the pack and then denied it then thats just imbecilic.

but i suggest you find some other excuse for the missing condom before you go pointing fingers.

do you two live alone?
__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
dlish is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:41 AM   #8 (permalink)
Banned
 
yes we live alone
nice19761976 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 05:57 AM   #9 (permalink)
Asshole
 
The_Jazz's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Chicago
OK, I'll tell you what you obviously want to hear: I'm fucking your wife. Every time you go to work, I get on a plane and fly half-way around the world and fuck her as hard as I can. Sorry that we had to use your condom.

I hope you understand how ridiculous that sounds. And how ridiculous accusing you wife of cheating solely based on one missing condom sounds. If you have other evidence, that's something different, but honestly, I don't even know your wife and I trust her more than I trust your ability to count or to find the condom that got separated from the rest.
__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo
The_Jazz is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:13 AM   #10 (permalink)
Custom User Title
 
Craven Morehead's Avatar
 
What else is going on that leads you to suspect this? A missing condom by itself isn't enough.
Craven Morehead is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:37 AM   #11 (permalink)
Eat your vegetables
 
genuinegirly's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Arabidopsis-ville
Jazz, you're silly.

Nice: This must be a distressing situation for you. While I wouldn't jump to conclusions, I would be concerned. If your wife says she doesn't know why there's a condom missing. If she did use it on another man - that means she's lying to you and cheating.

Your wife may be cheating on you. But she may not. The next question you need to ask yourself, is how this affects you. How will you allow it to affect your relationship? Are you comfortable with the thought of her being with another man? It doesn't sound like you are. Why is this? Why would she want to cheat on you and lie about it? How is your relationship? It might be a terrible stress on your relationship for her to be alone when you work nights. Maybe this is an indication of a deep-seeded issue with your marriage, one that you could potentially resolve.

With a worry like this, be sure to have safe sex. If she is sleeping around, you don't want to be slapped with the consequences.
__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
genuinegirly is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:49 AM   #12 (permalink)
Insane
 
Viking1064's Avatar
 
Location: New Jersey
One missing condom doesn't mean she is cheating on you. How open sexually are you with each other? Maybe she missed you, used something to masturbate with and covered it with a condom. Maybe she feels uncomfortable sharing this with you.
Viking1064 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:52 AM   #13 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
Yeah, maybe she used it to roll up on something to jack off with. Like a TV remote or cell phone.

Does your TV remote smell like latex?
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 08:16 AM   #14 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
 
dlish's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
Yeah, maybe she used it to roll up on something to jack off with. Like a TV remote or cell phone.

Does your TV remote smell like latex?
no, but Jazz's phone does

you could contact a PI to sniff things out for you (you could suggest he sniff the remote or phone too), but that might be a costly exercise with little results.

if you wanted to go all out, you may want to set up a surveilance system, consider tapping the phones, pinhole spy cam, or try staking out her work or your own house... maybe even try intercepting her emails...there's an infinitesimal reasons to freak out.

do you have neighbours? maybe someone next door needed one...


my point in all this? if you got nothing except a missing condom as evidence, then you're going to need to a little bit more than that im afraid. you need to take a chill pill. be wary, but dont freak yourself out. not yet anyways.

oh..and i'd be wary of Jazz. he's a smooth man-slut that'd screw anything that moves. gentlemen, lock your women up when you're at work
__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
dlish is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 08:39 AM   #15 (permalink)
Junkie
 
eribrav's Avatar
 
Location: upstate NY
I have to go back a step and wonderwhy in the world you even know exactly how many condoms should be there?
Is there a very high underlying level of distrust in your relationship?
eribrav is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 08:43 AM   #16 (permalink)
I read your emails.
 
canuckguy's Avatar
 
Location: earth
Ok so it was a 5 pack of condoms and it was opened but none were used at that time but you came back and one is missing? do you folks normally open the box even if your not going to be using them right away? who opened the box the first time? you or her?

any chance your opened and had sex and forgot you used it?
canuckguy is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 09:23 AM   #17 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
telekinetic's Avatar
 
Location: Fauxenix, Azerona
Yeah...why open a pack you're not going to use? That makes no sense. This whole story hinges on the fact that a "5-pack" of condoms now contains 4. This sounds extremely fishy to me, because....CONDOMS DO NOT COME IN FIVE PACKS! After extensive searches to verify my initial thoughts, the ONLY condoms that are offered in a 5-pack that I was able to find was a single brand offered in the UK. Every other brand and make was a a 1 pack, 3 pack, 6 pack, and then 10/12/36/60/100/etc. No five pack.

If the planets align and you actually were using that particular brand, you're also missing another important detail, does your wife have a history of being really stupid? Opening a new pack of condoms and using one with the mailman is a pretty unintelligent move. Maybe she's sick of you snooping, maybe she wants you to confront her, and she'll pull that condom out of her purse/medicine cabinet/jewelry box and throw it at you and yell at you for what a bastard you are for being so paranoid, etc etc.
__________________
twisted no more
telekinetic is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 09:31 AM   #18 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
The plot thickens....

...or it has become engorged..... as it were.....
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 10:26 AM   #19 (permalink)
Eat your vegetables
 
genuinegirly's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Arabidopsis-ville
He never said it was a 5-pack of condoms, he just said that there were 5 in it the last time he noticed. Maybe it was a 6-pack at the time of purchase, they used one together, leaving 5, then one was missing, leaving 4.

Maybe it was a 24-pack. Some people just keep running mental inventories of items they consider essential.
__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
genuinegirly is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 10:44 AM   #20 (permalink)
Currently sour but formerly Dlishs
 
dlish's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Australia/UAE
Mr Condoms, our first respondant will be able to help us here. He's the resident condom expert. he'll be able to tell us for certain on the pack size.

where is our OP from?
__________________
An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere

I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay?
- Filthy
dlish is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 11:04 AM   #21 (permalink)
Asshole
 
The_Jazz's Avatar
 
Administrator
Location: Chicago
Ok, ok, it's not me. I need 2 condoms.
__________________
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - B. Franklin
"There ought to be limits to freedom." - George W. Bush
"We have met the enemy and he is us." - Pogo
The_Jazz is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 11:12 AM   #22 (permalink)
Eat your vegetables
 
genuinegirly's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: Arabidopsis-ville
I always forget that Daniel deals with condoms for work.
__________________
"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
genuinegirly is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 11:30 AM   #23 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Location: My head.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
The plot thickens....

...or it has become engorged..... as it were.....
OMG ... man this is brilliant!
Xerxys is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 12:28 PM   #24 (permalink)
Junkie
 
highthief's Avatar
 
Location: Ontario, Canada
This has all the makings of a classic thread ...
__________________
Si vis pacem parabellum.
highthief is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 12:48 PM   #25 (permalink)
Junkie
 
I've always found peoples responses to things like this interesting....

"Is there a level of deep-seeded mistrust because you remembered there were 5 condoms, not 4?"

Kind of ridiculous reactions in my opinion...I happen to remember things like that too. I'm a number person, but that's just me. I think it's a reasonable response when something of that importance is missing. I wouldn't say the OP has major issues with his wife and their relationship however I don't think they're being paranoid either. That's the kind of thing that, despite not having evidence you might be better off to make yourself more aware of what your wife is doing, who she sees, where she goes, who shes talking to etc. Not snooping...just being more aware of things.

I must ask, did you check behind the nightstand, underneath the bed etc? Perhaps it was misplaced or dropped in an unfortunate strategic location causing all this worry for nothing.

Goodluck...
surferlove007 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 01:07 PM   #26 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
telekinetic's Avatar
 
Location: Fauxenix, Azerona
This post couldn't possibly have anything to do with the cuckold fetishes you've posted about on exbii, could it?
__________________
twisted no more
telekinetic is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 01:23 PM   #27 (permalink)
More Than You Expect
 
Manic_Skafe's Avatar
 
Location: Queens
Quote:
Originally Posted by nice19761976 View Post
okay,i m a married man,37 yr old,my wife is 32 yr old ,one day same question asked my wife that how many is too much,i said nothing is too much,we both have relation out side marrage and we both love each other too much ,
i did not count how many i had.i think more than 20.and i still think its not too much
Emphasis mine.

/thread
__________________
"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian
Manic_Skafe is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 01:31 PM   #28 (permalink)
warrior bodhisattva
 
Baraka_Guru's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: East-central Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
The plot thickens....

...or it has become engorged..... as it were.....
__________________
Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön

Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
Baraka_Guru is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 01:37 PM   #29 (permalink)
Degenerate
 
Aladdin Sane's Avatar
 
Location: San Marvelous
So in another thread you say that you both have relations outside of your marriage and now you're worried because a rubber is missing?
Willis, you have some 'splainin' to do.
__________________
Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.
Aladdin Sane is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 02:24 PM   #30 (permalink)
Young Crumudgeon
 
Martian's Avatar
 
Location: Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aladdin Sane View Post
So in another thread you say that you both have relations outside of your marriage and now you're worried because a rubber is missing?
Willis, you have some 'splainin' to do.
I think that may be a communication error. The OP seems to be a non-native English speaker; I read the prior post as "we've both had relations prior to marriage."

Addressing the OP's concerns, not only is your wife clearly cheating, but she's criminally cheap. The only possible conclusion is that she pulled a single condom out of your pack and is using it over and over again with her illicit lover. After all, it's not like she could just walk down to the corner store to buy some for her affairs.

The only way you can retain honour at this point is through ritual suicide. Protip: make sure the dagger is nice and sharp.
__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
Martian is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:00 PM   #31 (permalink)
 
ring's Avatar
 
Location: ❤
cuckold:
mid-13c., from O.Fr. cucuault, from cucu (see cuckoo) + pejorative suffix. So called from the female bird's alleged habit of changing mates, or her authentic habit of leaving eggs in another bird's nest. The verb is 1580s, from the noun. Related: Cuckoldry (1520s).
ring is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:23 PM   #32 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Man, I wonder how much research you all do when I say something stupid.

I better make sure my Facebook and LinkedIn is up to date.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:42 PM   #33 (permalink)
Young Crumudgeon
 
Martian's Avatar
 
Location: Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
Man, I wonder how much research you all do when I say something stupid.

I better make sure my Facebook and LinkedIn is up to date.
I'm cyberstalking you right now.
__________________
I wake up in the morning more tired than before I slept
I get through cryin' and I'm sadder than before I wept
I get through thinkin' now, and the thoughts have left my head
I get through speakin' and I can't remember, not a word that I said

- Ben Harper, Show Me A Little Shame
Martian is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 07:44 PM   #34 (permalink)
I Confess a Shiver
 
Plan9's Avatar
 
Lemme know if you find anything good. Rumor has it if you look up my username you can find wedding pictures.
__________________
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
Plan9 is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 08:46 PM   #35 (permalink)
Custom User Title
 
Craven Morehead's Avatar
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru View Post
Yeah, maybe she used it to roll up on something to jack off with. Like a TV remote or cell phone.

Does your TV remote smell like latex?
or this

Craven Morehead is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 09:23 PM   #36 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
telekinetic's Avatar
 
Location: Fauxenix, Azerona
Quote:
Originally Posted by ring View Post
cuckold:
mid-13c., from O.Fr. cucuault, from cucu (see cuckoo) + pejorative suffix. So called from the female bird's alleged habit of changing mates, or her authentic habit of leaving eggs in another bird's nest. The verb is 1580s, from the noun. Related: Cuckoldry (1520s).
In this context, it refers to a husband who gets sexually excited by the thought (or the act) of his wife having sex with another man.

---------- Post added at 09:23 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:10 PM ----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by Plan9 View Post
Man, I wonder how much research you all do when I say something stupid.

I better make sure my Facebook and LinkedIn is up to date.
This just sounded spammy, so I wanted to see if there were 30 other posts on other forums by niceguy19761976 about this with the same wording.

Incidently, since we're off topic already, this guy hasn't re-responded, I noticed something else possibly pertinent on exbii about whether he meant 'relation outside marriage' to refer to before marriage or during... (he only has like 20 posts there, there isn't much to read)

From the 'how many sexual partners?' thread here in our sexuality forum:

Quote:
okay,i m a married man,37 yr old,my wife is 32 yr old ,one day same question asked my wife that how many is too much,i said nothing is too much,we both have relation out side marrage and we both love each other too much ,
i did not count how many i had.i think more than 20.and i still think its not too much
(emphasis mine)

Whereas in a post on eXBii:
Quote:
i met only one girl before our marrage she was my gf,she had 3
1)her cousin
2)her college boy frnd
3)her friends husband
the thing is that when i thing about it i feel good
(he clarifies later in thread he meant he had only slept with one girl before his wife, but she had slept with 3).

So, either he's slept with 18 girls since he got married, implying that yes, they have an open marriage (or he's a cheater), or something doesn't add up.
__________________
twisted no more
telekinetic is offline  
Old 12-12-2009, 09:45 PM   #37 (permalink)
Eccentric insomniac
 
Slims's Avatar
 
Location: North Carolina
...Also notice that she apparently slept with her friends husband.

What moral difference is there between betraying your friend by sleeping with her husband and betraying your husband?
__________________
"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence
Slims is offline  
Old 12-13-2009, 03:28 AM   #38 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
Daniel_'s Avatar
 
Location: Southern England
Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly View Post
I always forget that Daniel deals with condoms for work.
You rang?

The earlier posts are right - five is an unusual pack size, but as has been said, it could have been a six, twelve, or other size that was partially depleted.

All in all, the couple EITHER have an open relationship, but the wife is carrying on outside agreed boundaries, OR he's a liar, OR he's miscounted, OR she's used one for something else.

Only they can sort this out, and only talking about it will sort it out for them.

For myself, I understand that it's possible to be frightened that she's cheating on him, but aroused by it at the same time.
__________________
╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
Daniel_ is offline  
Old 12-13-2009, 06:14 AM   #39 (permalink)
Banned
 
first off all i did not post any comment on exwii,okay.
yes we both hav relation out side marrage ,we both know each others past,but my question is if she had with another man why did she hide with me.
where the condom gone?
i m 100% sure she slept with another man but why she hiding it.
my english is not good sorry for that
nice19761976 is offline  
Old 12-13-2009, 07:22 AM   #40 (permalink)
Insane
 
Magpie_1's Avatar
 
Location: Ontario, Canada
Quote:
Originally Posted by Martian View Post
The only way you can retain honour at this point is through ritual suicide. Protip: make sure the dagger is nice and sharp.
Ha ha I love you.
__________________
"Art is what you can get away with."
- Andy Warhol
Magpie_1 is offline  
 

Tags
cheating, condom, condom counting, infidelity, missing, missing condom, wife

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:30 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360