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Old 05-12-2003, 06:04 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Strap-on w/your man?

Ok, kinda serious question here, girlz...

My SO and I were discussing anal; he likes giving it to me, and I think it's ok, once in a while. But I was joking the last time he was wanting to, and I said, "how 'bout I do you for a change?"
He was quiet for a second, and didn't immediately say, "no way!" like I expected him to. I halfway joked a bit further and mentioned getting a strap-on, and I think he may like the idea, but doesn't want to admit it.

I'm worried though, if we try it, if it will weird-out our relationship. We're not into the dom/sub scene at all, and I can't imagine just coming home and telling him, "down on your knees, I'm going in!" I think it might be fun, and I get the feeling he might go along, but I just don't know how to approach the actual act with him.

Any advice from anyone who's tried it?
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Old 05-12-2003, 11:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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haven't tried it, but it doesn't have to be any more dominating for you than vice versa. give it a shot if you're both game. if it's not fun, then all you're out is the price of a strap on. if everyone likes it, well, then there ya go, a new direction for your sex life to go in. make sure to communicate about ANYTHING new you try, and you'll be fine.
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Old 05-13-2003, 07:37 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by suviko
Don't go for a strap straight away. Cut the nail short in your index finger and show him how good that can be. Jerk-off and fondle his "G-spot" at the same time. After this, it ought to be a lot easier to get him try it. If you like toys buy a really small dildo, two fingers wide or a small plug first.
exactly what i was going to say
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Old 05-13-2003, 02:27 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Damn, wish my husband would go for that. lol
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Old 05-13-2003, 03:09 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I would Love to try that with someone....I think it might be a lot of fun...

I almost did once but for some reason or another, it didn't happen.
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Old 05-16-2003, 06:29 PM   #6 (permalink)
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But has anyone actually tried it? I was just worried how this might change our relationship. I'm afraid that he might think that I might think that he mya have homosexual tendencies or something if I act serious about going through with it. Sometimes I do finger his anus while I'm giving him head, and he seems to like it, so maybe I will progressively get more ambitious.
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Old 05-16-2003, 09:55 PM   #7 (permalink)
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my boyfriend made it clear very early on that he was completely happy with me NOT touching his ass, and I've respected that, so... I really don't know what to tell you, other than to keep the lines of communication open.
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Old 05-16-2003, 11:03 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Last edited by suviko; 06-22-2003 at 06:05 AM..
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Old 05-17-2003, 07:19 PM   #9 (permalink)
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As my human sexuality professor says, "If you're a guy and you like anal sex or stimulation, all it means is that you're a guy and you like anal sex or stimulation." It doesn't mean he has homosexual tendencies. It's much easier to stimulate the prostate via the anus than any other way--and it is highly pleasurable for a male to have their prostate stimulated.

You might compare it to your G-spot. The G-spot in women and the prostate in men come from the same cells in utero, before the chromosomes come into play and tell the gonadal tissue what to develop into. Yay for human sexuality class.
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Old 05-17-2003, 08:08 PM   #10 (permalink)
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My man told me his ass is off limits.

I respect that.

However, mine is fair play
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Old 05-25-2003, 09:01 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Yeah i want to try this so bad, think he does too but fingers has been it so far, he hits the roof... so maybe soon i'll bring it up, he likes anal i don't but for him and he is careful so i put up with it ,never o'd over it though. Like to tru the reversal and give it too him watch him squirm!!
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Old 05-29-2003, 07:50 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Location: O-H-I-O
My boy expressed a firm "no" on this one...Damnit!
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Old 05-29-2003, 03:02 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Every once in a while, mine would like to "play and experiment" with my vibrator. He likes it, more for the kinky factor. Next step past the vibrator is a strap-on. Have talked about it TONS of times....now to actually go out and BUy one...thats a different story.
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Old 06-01-2003, 01:50 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Ok, I finally wnet through with it! A while back, I ordered a strap-on, and have been saving it for the right moment. Last night, while we were getting intimate, he started fingering my ass, which is a signal that he is interested in anal. Sure enough, he whispers in my ear, "How 'bout some anal tonight?" I give him my best mischevious look and say, "Sounds great! wait right here." I go to get the lube and the strap-on (he thinks I'm just going to get the lube) and I walk back in the bedroom with it on. As soon as he recovers from his look of shock, I tell him to lay down on the bed so I can lube him up. I straddle his ass, and spread lube over the dildo and his ass, and gently press forwards. He mumbles something like, "be gentle now," as I start thrusting. He works his way to his knees, and I'm getting this awesome power trip from fucking him in the ass! At one point I thrust deep into him, reach around, and find that he is rock hard. A few strokes with my hand, and he blows, but still stays hard. I ask him if I should keep going, and he says don't stop! This was one of the most erotically charged nights of my life! Talk about expanding your horizons! Later (much later, after we were both physically exhausted), we talked a little about it, and it wasn't weird at all. I don't think I'll be freaking out the strap-on every night, but what a trip!
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Old 06-01-2003, 03:24 AM   #15 (permalink)
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w00tw00t!

that's an awesome story, congrats to you and your man!
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Old 06-01-2003, 04:07 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Last edited by suviko; 06-22-2003 at 06:05 AM..
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Old 06-02-2003, 10:24 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I've been curious about the same thing with my SO. After reading up on anal stimulation for a guy I've been all kinds of interested. I've wanted to do it probably more than he wants to try it, but that is only because I want to make him feel good any way I can. He is still pretty leary about it and I found out recently part of it has to do with some repressed fears. He used to be teased in school cause he hung out with girls just as much as guys despite the threat of "kooties". That progressed into name calling and homosexual jokes. Sadly I think this has made him fear that others, even myself, would think he is truely gay. However, we've talked about it some and there is hope yet for some anal action. As for right now I only lightly press against his pernum between his penis and his anus. Maybe we'll move on to fingers and such later, but I think this is going to all be done in baby steps for his sake.
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Old 06-09-2003, 03:35 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Last edited by suviko; 06-22-2003 at 06:05 AM..
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Old 06-11-2003, 11:28 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Wow! That is one great looking there, Suv!

Of course, I'm partial to purple.

I would love to try this with my husband, but honestly its taken years to get to the point where he is comfortable with me just fondling his ass during sex. I'm in it for the long haul, so I can wait though

But damn if I don't want that toy... where did you find it? Link?
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Old 06-29-2003, 09:15 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by blueskies
Damn, wish my husband would go for that. lol



I would have to agree. My husband would never ever go for that. He says that is strictly a one way street. To bad for me I guess?
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Old 06-30-2003, 12:23 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Melun Jinn-

Just curious; How did you get him interested in doing it the first time?
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Old 07-03-2003, 05:33 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Location: Silicon Valley, CA
Quote:
Just curious; How did you get him interested in doing it the first time?
Not to say that this is Melun Jinn's case, I don't know her or her husband, but sometimes men *ask* for it.

Someday, I hope I can do this with someone I really care for. I've only heard positive, exciting stories. And, it doesn't have to be a dom/sub/power trip thing.
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Old 07-03-2003, 04:38 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: UK
Quote:
Originally posted by *Nikki*
My man told me his ass is off limits.

I respect that.

However, mine is fair play
Lol!
Yeah we are the same!

I was hoping to find his G Spot, but oh well never mind!
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Old 07-05-2003, 08:45 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Well my husband actually went for the idea!!!! When the idea of doing anal to me was brought up I was a little afraid I guess you could say. He went and purchased an anal kit (LOL) and told me to try those first to get me used to it. I told him I would if he would so he did, and now I do it to him as well. I didn't realize the pleasure I would receive from doing it to him! There was just something about it that turned me on too!
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Old 07-06-2003, 04:15 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Location: Orlando, FL
This is one of my boyfriend's favorite things, sexually. He can't get enough of it! Which is unforunate sometimes, because it requires a lot of preparation and .. clean up. The strap on that we have is a two way one, and has a clit tickling part, which is nice. I think he gets the best orgasms of his life from this

I tend to think more guys would be into it if the subject was brought up - good luck, girls
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Old 07-16-2003, 10:20 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Location: Somewhere near Hubby
I haven't done the strap-on thing (I'm not that coordinated) but...

I have him lay face down and lube him up. Then I use a penis-shaped rubber dildo with "balls" attached. I push it in with my hand as I lay next to him.

It's fun to "fuck" him and be able to press my body into him at the same time. He enjoys it but doesn't get off. Usually it's foreplay but sometimes it doesn't lead to anything else.

He purrs like a kitten and breathes really heavy. The best part is that we can talk and share a lot of quiet emotional stuff.

Sometimes it's a domination thing but not usually.
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Old 07-17-2003, 08:55 AM   #27 (permalink)
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Location: Louisiana
I have brought anal sex up many times with my hubby and frankly he hates the idea!!! I am curious but no means no and I leave it at that!!!
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Old 07-20-2003, 02:03 PM   #28 (permalink)
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This is one of my fantasies that I'd like to see come true. I've been wanting to grab the old strap-on and plug away at my man but I still haven't found the man interested enough to allow this to happen. Someday..
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Old 07-23-2003, 05:19 PM   #29 (permalink)
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I think alot of guys say no because they're afraid their wives will think they're gay, or some other such nonsense....truly, I think most men are interested, curious, and would even be willing to go along if the moment was right....

I know mine was. It's one of his favorite things now.

m
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Old 07-30-2003, 01:03 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Location: ... .- -. ..-. .-. .- -. -.-. .. ... -.-. --- --..-- -.-. .-
The anus is just another one of the errogenous zones (for both men and women). Enjoying anal stimulation does not make one gay!

I don't know if you've heard of this video, Bend Over Boyfriend, but I hear it's a good instructional video if you're both interested in trying it for the first time.

You can find it from this website, doing a search on Bend Over Boyfriend: http://www.goodvibes.com/

I wish my boyfriend would be willing to try this. You're a lucky lady!
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Old 07-30-2003, 07:21 PM   #31 (permalink)
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Collide-

I'm going to have to check this out, it looks like fun...

I wish I had known about this earlier; and you can get the video in a kit that includes strap-on and lube!
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Old 07-30-2003, 09:57 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Location: ... .- -. ..-. .-. .- -. -.-. .. ... -.-. --- --..-- -.-. .-
Yup! There is conveniently a Good Vibrations in the city where I reside, and every so often I'll go there with my bf to pick up a few new toys. Unfortunately, BOB is not something that he's particularly interested in.
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Old 08-04-2003, 05:37 PM   #33 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney, Australia
Bottoms are fun.

Quote:
Originally posted by awanderingsoul
But has anyone actually tried it? I was just worried how this might change our relationship. I'm afraid that he might think that I might think that he mya have homosexual tendencies or something if I act serious about going through with it. Sometimes I do finger his anus while I'm giving him head, and he seems to like it, so maybe I will progressively get more ambitious.
Hi There,

I'm into a bit of B&D action and have tried this with a few different partners over the years. In my experience he'll either get right off on it and become a bit of anal slut and want it all the time, or he'll think it's fun occassionally but not really be that into it. I haven't encountered any men who thought they might be gay because they found out they enjoyed a bit of anal action. I also haven't encountered any men who didn't ennjoy a bit of a prostate tickle.

Anyone seen Road Trip where Stifler (I don't know the actor's name or his characters name in Road Trip - doh!) received a bit of up the bum action from a hot nurse. I doubt many guys saw that and thought he was gay, they probably saw that and though 'Mmmmm, hot nurse, fingers up bum, I'd like to try that'.

Who knows how guys minds work though, it all comes down to individual tastes. Try the strap-on, see if it works for both of you - you might love that feeling of having him bent over in front of you doing him the way he does you or you miht hate it. You both may decide that fingers are the way to go and not need to go that extra mile.

As long as you're both comfortable and having fun with it, it shouldn't get to intense. If it feels a bit silly just whack him on the bum and say something like "I'm gonna ride you now cowboy!", something to make a giggle and relax the situation.

Needless to say, you can never have enough lube. Water based is crap for anal so go with either a silicon based lube or, stalwart of anal fetishists everywhere, some crisco!

Good luck, hope it's fun if you decide to go there.

Cheers,
Julie
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Old 08-04-2003, 06:19 PM   #34 (permalink)
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Thanks, Julie, that was great info.
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Old 01-12-2005, 11:21 PM   #35 (permalink)
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It is an old thread, but... just interesting...
It ahppen few weeks ago, my friend (she's bi, or better said "lesbian who has nothing against man") was talking about strap-on. As I never seen one in nature, I ask her if I can see it. Ok, it's how it started... even I am not bi at all, when I see it "in place" I was too curious not to try. So, she fucked me and I did her too... I can't say it was bad, but... simply, I cannot feel "on my own" with another girl. On the other hand, to be so "boyish" was really new experience what I like (even, I must say that before I didn't know how hard work is what boys are doing to us). Somehow, idea to do it with my boyfriend came as something logical. But, how to tel him? How to ask him? Still I like it, and as time is passing I like it more and more, but...
Alicia
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Old 04-02-2006, 03:12 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Location: Australia
I have been doing my hubby with a strapon for a few years now and we both love the variety it adds to our sex life.There is no dom/sub relationship with us,just the chance to change places and get a little kinky now and then.
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Old 04-02-2006, 09:11 AM   #37 (permalink)
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As posted in another thread... one of my fantasies is to tie a guy up, then surprise him (ha!) by pulling out a strap-on and totally nailing him in the ass.

And then of course, I'll let him have his revenge on me.

Ok I've just managed to get all turned on picturing that in my mind...
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Old 04-02-2006, 10:30 AM   #38 (permalink)
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I recently bought a feeldoe (strapless strap on) and it turned out to be great.

No weirdness ensued, it was just good fun.
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Old 04-02-2006, 10:48 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Wow, this is an ollld thread!

Martel and I want to get a Feeldoe! We love anal play, both of us get a LOT of enjoyment out of it! The idea of me doing him.... oh man, what an INSANE turn on!
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Old 04-02-2006, 11:06 AM   #40 (permalink)
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The only thing is that you need amazing muscles to keep it in while thrusting. It's going to take a bit of practice to have me on top, but him on top works amazingly well.
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