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Old 02-18-2005, 05:25 PM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
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Sea Sponge, Swirl (abstract works)

Today I was feeling “weighted”. I describe it this way because it literally feels like a weight in my chest, and sometimes my eyes. It is a feeling that makes me feel depressed and switches me from optimist mode to pessimist mode. It starts out slowly and builds momentum. Once I start to feel those first hints of “weight” I know that later I am going to be feeling upset and unhappy. Just a few moments ago I was feeling this way when I suddenly had an unusual idea. I was going to paint.

I broke away from the computer and started looking for my old paints. I opened up my bag full of art stuff and started looking for them. I couldn't find them and after a cursing rant I realized that I had just been looking in the wrong pocket (way to go Captain Patients). Having found my paint I sat down and ripped out two pages from my crappy sketch pad and went to work. I wanted to use blue so I just threw massive spot down on the first piece of paper, which I used to mix colors, and started brushing away at the other. I stared adding in white, yellow, red, and soon some green started to emerge naturally. I just went berserk, really. I was pushing the paint around, letting it do whatever it wanted to do. I was not the artist, I was just the facilitator letting the colors evolve into whatever they wanted to become.

Once the first piece was compete, which didn't take long considering my arm was flying around like a crazy animal with a mind of its own, I sat there wanting more. I stared at the completed piece and then back at my palette. My eyes kept going back and forth, back and forth.

“Screw it,” I said aloud (Or, had I just thought it? No matter!).

I set my brush down on the palette and began swirling like a mad man. The colors mixed and blended into some bizarre formation. Feeling wild, I flipped my brush down and cut through the wet paint with the other end, exposing the dried, brilliant colors beneath. Not only was the appearance visually appealing, but the texture it created was also cool, so I continued the process. Soon I had two pages of brilliant, abstract art in front of me. I felt somehow lifted. The two small paintings I had just done were like stream of conscious journals written by some wild writer. They were not spectacular by any means, but they were intriguing nonetheless.

I find it interesting how when I draw something incredibly detailed and complex I begin to feel trapped by it, but when I just let the art flow out I feel liberated, and somehow lifted. Perhaps it is those feelings of negativity escaping as energy and becoming something that can be felt and seen on a piece of paper that makes me feel better, or perhaps it is because looking at my art lets me look at myself and see what I really feel. Whatever it was, it felt great.
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Old 03-06-2005, 08:49 PM   #2 (permalink)
Crazy
 
thats amazing that you can express yourself so deeply throught art. I am the same way with the guitar, it always helps me when i need it to. I really like your choice of color, its almost like the ocean or something deep in space. I really like it. Personally, i like the second one better if i had to choose. the difference between the colors and the way they flow together is really amazing.
I really like them alot, keep em coming!
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Old 03-06-2005, 11:12 PM   #3 (permalink)
Heliotrope
 
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Location: A warm room
I love the colours in the first painting. No wonder you felt refreshed after.
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