Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Chatter > Tilted Fun Zone


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 06-09-2003, 10:38 AM   #1 (permalink)
"Officer, I was in fear for my life"
 
hrdwareguy's Avatar
 
Location: Oklahoma City
How to become ordained in under 3 minutes

Did you ever want or wish you were a minister. Well, now is your chance. This site will ordaine you in under 3 minutes. Then it's just a matter of following up with your local government as to what you have to do for them to recognize you as a religous minister type person.

http://ulc.org
__________________
Gun Control is hitting what you aim at

Aim for the TFP, Donate Today
hrdwareguy is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 10:42 AM   #2 (permalink)
Psycho
 
forgotten_dream's Avatar
 
Wow.... I don't know wether to be amused or really, really frightened....
__________________
"A ouija board just works better if you've made it yourself. It's sortof like how 'Clue' is more interesting when one of you has actually killed someone."
forgotten_dream is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 10:45 AM   #3 (permalink)
I aim to misbehave!
 
rockogre's Avatar
 
Location: SW Oklahoma
Thank you. I am now another step closer to forging my own religion involving hub caps and four leaf clovers.
__________________
Only two defining forces have ever offered to die for you,
Jesus Christ and the American G. I.
One died for your soul, the other for your freedom
rockogre is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 10:47 AM   #4 (permalink)
Gastrolithuanian
 
Giant Hamburger's Avatar
 
Location: low-velocity Earth orbit
Done... and it actually took about 1 minute.

I am please to introduce to you...
Reverend Giant Hamburger
Who has been ordained this Monday, June Ninth, 2003 .

Let me know how I can best serve you.

I'd like to thank the gods, my parents, my loving wife and children and hrdwareguy for helping me realize my dreams.
-GH

Giant Hamburger is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 12:58 PM   #5 (permalink)
lonely rolling star
 
sadistikdreams's Avatar
 
Location: Seattle.
you shouldnt have showed me this...


I am ordained. *scratches head*

Huh. I thought it would be cooler. Well, im going to marry a Marilyn Manson action figure to a Ninja Turtle.
__________________
"Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone.
The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.
"
-Lin Yutang

hearts, by d.a.
sadistikdreams is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 01:00 PM   #6 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Minx's Avatar
 
Location: Up yonder
Ahhh yes the joys of becoming whatever you wish via the internet. I think three of the losers (opps did I say that out loud) that work in my office are "ministers". Slow day at work or what?!
__________________
You've been a naughty boy....go to my room!
Minx is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 01:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
ClerkMan!
 
BBtB's Avatar
 
Location: Tulsa, Ok.
Of course ANYONE with time and money could build a church and start having services. Being ordained don't mean snit unless you are trying to advance in that religion (and most religions aren't even that well structured anyway) but I will go take my realism over here...
__________________
Meridae'n once played "death" at a game of chess that lasted for over two years. He finally beat death in a best 34 out of 67 match. At that time he could ask for any one thing and he could wish for the hope of all mankind... he looked death right in the eye and said ...

"I would like about three fiddy"
BBtB is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 07:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
.
 
bundy's Avatar
 
Location: Tokyo
haha, the right reverend bundy hereby announces that as of today, the green bic pen is now officially married to the black artline.
__________________
Ohayo!!!
bundy is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 07:36 PM   #9 (permalink)
Loose Cunt
 
Meridae'n's Avatar
 
Location: North Bondi RSL
Does this mean we can all wear stupid white pointy hats?
__________________
What's easier to believe: that a guy was born without sex in the manner of several Greek demigods and grew up to be able to transmute liquids and alter his body density yet couldn't escape government execution, or that three freemasons in a vehicle made with aluminum foil in an era before digital technology escaped our atmosphere, landing on the moon, broadcasted from there, and then flew back without burning up?
Meridae'n is offline  
Old 06-09-2003, 09:57 PM   #10 (permalink)
Indifferent to anti-matter
 
vermin's Avatar
 
Location: Tucson, AZ
I was ordained on March 26th. Two of the cats are married, one of the cats is now married to the dog, the goldfish are all married to each other (group thing), and the lawnmower is married to the circular saw.

Does this mean I'm tax-exempt?
__________________
If puns were sausages, this would be the wurst.
vermin is offline  
Old 06-10-2003, 09:49 AM   #11 (permalink)
Banned
 
Location: OlyWa
your only tax exempt if you start a church... ive been ordained for about a year... nothing exciting yet, but ill feel fine once the rapture comes!
Ogre840 is offline  
 

Tags
minutes, ordained

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 04:26 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360