marcopolo

<center>Super Heroes In Training</center>

<center></center>

I am now accepting applications for SHIT on behalf of Superman and Batman .
When applying please include :

1) A list of your Super Powers .
2) Is there anything or anyone that can destroy above said Super Powers ?
3) A description ( or picture ) of your Super Hero Costume .
4) And what hours are you willing to work ?

No limit will be given to the number of Super Trainee's as there is a plethora of evil to eliminate .
SHIT is an equal opportunity employer .

__________________
Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

bernadette

<center><font size="5" color="#9966FF"><b>The Bewitching Samantha Stevens</b></font>

<font color="violet"><img src="http://www.hasfurrychildren.com/tfp/bewitched.jpg" border="10"></font>
*my costume varies upon need*

My super powers are practically unlimited.
With a mere tiny twitch of my nose, I can turn you into a pumpkin or a polka dotta green goat.
I can fly, be invisible, halt or reverse time and much much more.
My powers are used solely with good intentions & motives.

The only thing that occasionally stops me is the High Witches Council... sometimes they get angry because i choose to live on Earth among & living the lifestyle of mortals.

As i can alter time to suit my needs, I am readily available to work at any given moment.</center>

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.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.

uncle phil

i'll be so happy (when) it's thursday...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

bundy

<center>THE INCREDIBLE DAMIR DOKIC



My super powers are also practically unlimited.
I am able to engage all tennis officials in combat, with no provocation.
I can lie on the road in protest over the price of salmon.
I am able to intimidate my only daughter into playing tennis for any country.
My powers can be used for the power of good and evil should the need arise.

I am only hindered in my incredible rage by the police and the burly security guards my daughter hires to protect herself from me.

My costume usually consists of poorly chosen, tight shorts, thongs and t-shirts.
I am identified mainly by my large beard, which doubles as my super protection from getting crumbs on my shirt.

I am pretty much available for anything these days
since i have been banned from all tennis venues around the world.</center>

__________________
Ohayo!!!

cchris

<center> GLOWING MAN





My powers are many and varied and they increase in proportion to the amount of alcohol in my system.

Reality and a Sunday sunrise are the only known weapons that are effective against my powers.

If the Pub is open then I will be available.</center>

Lets kill the wowsers first.

__________________
There's a fine line between participation and mockery

Fremen

I am Flybart!

I can fly circles around the meanest shitpiles.
My superpowers consist of being able to withstand incredibly foul odors while eating my dinner.
I can simultaneously look at 50 people at a time.
Fear me, Phishheads!!
I also can detect a fatal queef a half-mile away, thereby warning my teammates of a possible horrible death.

The only weaknesses I have are gigantic sticky strips made out of fruit, and women named Marve.

My mentor was an incredibly gifted older gent named flyman.
Unfortunately, he is away visiting "upstate" due to poor mentoring habits on his part, which I mistook for friendly bouts of Greco-Roman wrestling.
He will be back anon, and in the meantime, I patrol the alleyways and dumpgrounds.

"Up-up-and-a-bzzzzzzzz!!!"