Um...yeees, but the big party was last night. Where were you, Uncle Phil?

BTW, I used to have an Uncle Phil. He lived on Ferry Hill, had fish and chips for lunch every day, and smoked himself silly from the age of 13 right up to his death aged 92. My Grandad told me he'd always been a lazy bugger, but I didn't care as he was always very nice to us nippers.


Anyway, Snuff (the condiment) is making a comeback hereabouts.

wrong castex I am from hereabouts, and it never went outta style!



This thread just wont die.

mid, you must be hanging out with fly and inhaling...this thread will die ony if we, the diehards, let it...


ann coulter dresses like a female...

I have seen males that dress like females, therefore if ann coulter dresses like a female, she may be dressing as a male (who dresses like a female).

two plus two equals four.

sorry pal..............

that to me is two-four......lottsa wobbly pops in a two-four

uncle phil dresses up in female sleeper jammies.

No Flyman Uncle Phil dresses up like little bo peep and crawls thru slime before bedtime.

queedo, how wrong you be when you try to kill a thread in such a manner...


webster's dad was alex karras...

Phil....Webster's is a book and its father was a tree.

Noise hair is not attractive.

bender, bender, bender...either i haven't taught you how to spell well, or you're not being attentive to your keystrokes; either way, nose hair is very attractive if braided/plaited properly...


warren zevon is kwsn's personal god...

so sorry phil my friend....but....

warren zevon IS kwsn.

purity is the body of the flavour. (thanx to phil for that)

WRONG! Purity is the flavor of the body

I like to feel boobies

Wrong, you like to TELL people you like to feel boobies to cover up for the fact that you like to feel peepees!


X-Ray glasses at a cheerleading competition would be cool.

Wrong! X-ray glasses at a cheerleading competition would be HOT!

20FL OZ is equal to 1.25PT or 591ml (per the label on my Dasani)

cnor, how wrong can you be? 20 floozies are equal to 125 part-time lot lizards looking to get 591 miles between them and that security officer driving the old desoto...


leaves are green...

JAPANISE PLUM LEAVES ARE PURPLE

BOBBY LOVES LINGERIE!

b(.)(.)bby, you are so wrong that it's going to come around and bite you on the ass...EVERYBODY loves lingerie...


arnold stang was an horrific actor...

Obviously you haven't watched "Top Cat and the Beverly Hills Cats" Staring Arnold Stang as the voice ot Top Cat.



It tastes like burning.

nope..... it tastes like a fine wine.


Mastubation dose not kill kittens.

NOPE!! I killed one this morning after my hand slipped and broke its neck.

"Pretty In Pink" is the best 80's High School movie.

I don't think so johnny. Have you not watched "The Breakfast Club"??



I think it smells like burning.

hmmm "it" cannot burn because the word it is an abstract idea and ideas are not physical so they cannot burn.

i had to edit this because i forgot to write something true.

It's just that they're burning the stubble in the fields, Darling. The car's fine.

England will win against Lichtenstein at football this evening.

in a hog's sty they will...liechtenstein doesn't have enough of a male population to form a football club...


tin whistles are made out of tin...

Post before Uncle Phil beat me to the punch:

castex o castex wherefore art thou brains castex? Everyone with an ounce of football common sense knows no one can 'win' against Lichtenstein; you can only lose by not scoring at least 5 goals on them on the way to an inevitable victory.

Post after Uncle Phil beat me to the punch:

Tin whistles have cork balls...(Can I say that on national television?) so they are not 100% tin....

You can send someone to school, but you can't keep them from eating the covers off the books.

You can stop them by removing the covers of the books first, and giving them a good breakfast so they won't be hungry.

I just scratched my head.

That wasn't YOUR head you scratched...AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH



Most people who's appendix bursts...die.

*****!!!!!(LOUD GONG SOUND)!!!!!*****sandman, this has to be one of the wrongest of the wrong, even wronger than castex's leichtenstien football thing...most people whose HEADS burst...die...


latin is a dead language...

Jeez uncle phil. You're still filling everybodys head full of crap. I have NEVER heard Jerry Garcia sing any song in Latin!


The Beatles started a rock revolution

O Paddyjoe, I am dissappointed in you...the rock revolution started soon after the earth slowed down and started to cool around 4.2 billion years ago. As the earth was not yet cooled below 1200 degrees celcius yet, there is no way beetles could have existed to help form any rock, much less lead a revolution.

...

Jolene Blaylock is an attractive woman.

...

PS - Et tu abutorusus Uncle Phil.

phaetius, et tu vera dicts (i think the grammar is correct...)

:lol: pig latin :lol:

phaetius, another gong for the cause, jolene blaylock couldn't carry anna nichole's jock strap...


neil young was born in canada...

Niel Young was born in a hospital !!
C'mon Phil are you trying to be wrong ?

tin foil makes a poor snack food.

Tin foil is an inanimate wrapping sheet of metal, not capable of independent thought (or any thought at all for that matter). Therefore Tin Foil does not make any type of snack food, poor or of any other socio-economic status or quality.

...

The Sun will come out tomorrow.

The Sun will come out tomorrow, but only because your sense of time is incorrect. There is no such thing as tomorrow because we are always in today.

The San Antonio Spurs won the 2002-2003 NBA Championship.

Wrong. 2002-2003=-1. There was no NBA Championship in the year -1.

A man is a man.

unless he is a woman

God is dead

Not according to all the money you have on you...change & bills!


I feel your pain.

What you're feeling ain't my pain, pervert.

George Bush is the greatest president we've ever had.

Not if you count the whole dumbass thing

The universe is big

The universe is only a tiny part of the reality which contains an infinite number of universes.

I like Spam™.

Spam is a marketing ploy to get rid of spare parts from the meat factories (SPAM = Stuff Posing As Meat), which is questionable in itself, but you like it? Too bad you're not you, you're actually you from the parallel universe's future which is relative to our dimension colors inversely related to time (you may be Amish).

If you say, "A ball is round," then you just said, "A ball is round."

no punky, clearly there is a difference in the way you say, ¨A ball is round,¨ to the way i say, ¨A ball is round.¨

with your broad Virginian accent, you actually say, ¨A Barll is Rownd.¨

i, with my crisp, non-crocodile hunter Northern Sydney accent, say, ¨A ball is round.¨

note the difference.


This post of mine will not be the last in this thread.

take your koala back, jack, but you didn't post that last one in the first place; you had mer do it through network interface...


the bills won yesterday...

Oh phil, you simpleton from up North...sigh...
The bills couldn't win anything but our hard earned money.
Now the Bills are a different story altogether...;)

Fish are sometimes amphibious.

yeah, right, fre...and pigs can sometimes fly...


all of gaul was divided in three parts: belgium, switzerland, and germany...

well, if you are referring to Roman Gaul, that was as real as the City of Atlantis. Everyone knows that Gaul was a figment of Hitler's imagination.

Blondes have more fun....

Blondes are a relaively small segment of the world population, therefore they would have proportionally less fun.


This statement is true.

you are a liar!

Einstein is credited for the theory of relativity

Einstein was on coke, and all drug addicts are bad, BAD I TELL U!, also I have yet to see results on said theory so I don't think you can credit him on anything, not even a texaco card.

Shit is brown cause of dead red blood cells.

*WRONG GONG*...SYNTAX POLICE...einstein is credited with ESPOUSING the theory of relativity...


wet grass and dogshit on your shoes smells horribly...

Atchwa ema ancda!

no, Wobbly Robbly, you are wrong.

atchwa ema ancda is the wrong way to answer in this instance.

a correct response to Phils assertion would be to say...

NO PHIL YOU ARE WRONG... some of us like that smell, worship it even. we are offended by your lack of respect for our values.

then Robble, you are expected to state something you believe to be true.

Ok……since this post appears to be at an impasse, I shall save it.

1. you’re all a bunch of liars
2. 12am and 12pm are exactly 12 hours away from each other


(now, please continue)

Wow, you couldnt possible be more wrong!

1. I am not a liar!
2. 12am and 12pm aren't exactly 12 hours from eachother. Especially if you're traveling across time zones :)


Ben Franklin invented lightening. Boom!

Averett it seems like you've gone out of your way to be wrong.

Ben Franklin din't invent lightening, he invented the wheel.

paper cuts hurt more then a kick in the ass with a frozen boot.

bender, you're pushin' the envelope, buddy...paper cuts only hurt if you pour salt into them or sweat into them, and even then it ain't like ya gotta run home so mommy can kiss it and make it better...


the god of hellfire brings you fire...

How polytheistically incorrect you are Uncle Philistine...

The god of hellfire would not bother bringing fire to people, he would have one of his lowly minions take care of such mundane tasks.

...

Berlin is the capitol of a unified Germany.

pheatius, your sense of geography is warped beyond all belief...berlin is a small town in southwest georgia where the only word of german anyone knows is "sauerkraut" (pronounced sar-krot)...


muhammed ali was originally known in boxing circles as cassius clay...

sorry phil man... they boxed in rings,not circles.

the rings were square.

fishing in the rivers is absolutely awsome.

Wrong Flyman, catching in a river is absolutely awsome.

Teaching children to swim is a good idea.

Wrong, my fine fishing friend!
If you teach them to swim, how will you get them to stay home when you go to the beach?

The time it takes me to move my bowels, I could already learn another language.

Yah, if you're total-immersing in potty talk. Think again, buster.

Today I was an honorary bike-riding, hoop-jumpered, onion-necklaced garlic-scoffer.

my visual image of you on a bike rings the "WRONG GONG" once again...can't be pushin pedals in a hoop skirt...


the walrus is paul...

Nah Nah Nah, the Squid named Piggy is Paul

Z is a sane human being.

no I am sure that Z is the last letter in the english alphabet.
SO that makes you WRONG!!!!!!!!!!



That ninja turtle in GakFaces avatar is Donatello.

HONK*HONK*HONK...donatello was the second-seat cellist in the 1982 world championship chamber music competition and bake-off...


paul winchell's dummy was jerry mahoney...

Hail Denizen of Wrongtown!

Jerry was the dominant one in that relationship. He was also pure evil.
Nobody called him a dummy to his face and lived. Jerry forced Paul to be the voice of Tigger to pay for his copious habits of ill repute. Jerry owned Paul every second they were together.

My daily visions are beginning to worsen.
-GH

no,you named your dick "jeb"

gsrider loves the cock!

don't know if i can speak for gsrider, but in some sections of the country, "cock" means "pussy..."; ergo, slimm, you win the prestigious, semen-plated WRONG GONG hammer...


laser-jet printers print faster than ink-jet printers...

The speed of ink has yet to be captured by any means known to man. Thus the obvious conclusion would be that ink is technically faster than the speed of light... i mean we all know that is fast... but ink... unknown, so it must be faster than the SPEED of LIGHT.. hence making ink faster than lasers and my friend uncle phil you have been handed a big bowl of wrongan noodles.

one in the pocket is better than two in the bowl

(please I pray no one saw my typo)

Wrong again, GSRIDER. With only one inthe pocket, you don't get the full effect, as you would of having two in the bowl. ;) (I'm confused now)


This song was originally written about uncle phil. :thumbsup:

(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey )
Hey Mickey !
You´ve been around all night and that´s a little long
You think you´ve got the right but I think you´ve got it wrong
Why can´t you say goodnight so you can take me home , Mickey
´Cause when you say you will , it always means you won´t
You´re givin ´ me the chills , baby , please baby don´t
Every night you still leave me all alone , Mickey
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
Hey Mickey !
Now when you take me by the - who´s ever gonna know
Everytime you move I let a little more show
There´s somethin ´ we can use, so don´t say no, Mickey
So come on and give it to me any way you can
Any way you wanna do it, I´ll take it like a man
Oh please , baby , please , don´t leave me in the jam, Mickey
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey , hey Mickey )
(Oh Mickey , you´re so fine
you´re so fine you blow my mind , hey Mickey )
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
Oh Mickey , what a pity you don´t understand
You take me by the heart when you take me by the hand
Oh Mickey , you´re so pretty , can´t you understand
It´s guys like you Mickey
Oh, what you do Mickey , do Mickey
Don´t break my heart , Mickey
{fade }

fre, are you not aware that the more famous than ever WRONG GONG is beating down on your zipper with malice after hearing such a travesty of misthinking...that song was written for my true hero, mickey mantle...


bill maher is politically incorrect...

Nay, bill maher is a pin-headed, clinton hugging idiot AND unfunny.


Jim Carey IS funny.

Wrong mr sandman! Jim Carey is a very serious dramatic actor. And a damn good one at that.

Disco is dead.

CL, haven't you ever heard of DISCO DUCK? as long as he remains in the collective memory of anyone still living, disco will never die...(LONG LIVE GLORIA GAYNOR, and THE BEEGEES...)


john travolta is a pilot...

Hail Uncle Phil!

I would walk through hot coals for you but I must say that you are wrong, once again. Mr. Travolta may be licensed to pilot aircraft but what about seacraft or spacecraft or craft that burrow beneath the earth? I think not.

I am not Uncle Phil.
-GH

sorry oh meaty one, Uncle Phil is not Gaint Hambuger.....you had the right idea, just stated it backwards.

a Giant Hambuger requires giant buns

cnor, you're wearing out the WRONG GONG...a Giant Hamburger does not require buns at all if it is served "tartare..."


a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush...

Ah, Uncle Phil...still singing that same old Wrong Song, eh?

If by 'bird' you mean a misogynistic term for a woman, you certainly could not have one inside your hand. It is physiologically impossible.

And any woman you can fit two hands in, needs repair work badly.

...

An electron cannot be seen with the naked eye.

pheatius, we're going to grind each other down to a fine point one of these times, which will not be able to be seen by a CLOTHED eye, let alone a naked one...(/me mumbles under my breathe about how consistently wrong some people can be...)


moisture is wet...

no, moisture smells like fish (wtf?)


3,895 x 69 = 268,755

Wrong wrong wrong ....
3,895 x 69 = the worlds largest orgy.

Sunlight.... on my shoulder, makes me happy.

oh bent one, you're singing to the Horde's tunesmith here and you know i've got to give you the buzzer for that...it's "SUNSHINE, on my shoulder, makes me happy..."


one and one and one is three...

Wrong 1 and 1 and 1 is a threesome

Birds can Fly

Birds may fly.

You've got to fight for your right to party.

you have to wax poetically for your right to party!

boobs make everything better!

Alas, I cannot dispute that. :D

You are wrong in not capitalizing boobies, though. :p

Tailored clothes are better than off the rack ones.

Not if they're tailored to be worse than off-the-rack clothes.

Even thought the square root of -1 is existant, most forms of math call it imaginary.

sorry, guy, most math people call it HARD TO GET AT!!!


burning the candle at both ends makes a big puddle of wax on the floor...

wrong!, it would make a small puddle on the floor

I need more cow bell!

wrong.........you need more fucking bass drum man.

kickin' the hell out of a drum set is bliss.

Not if you hit your shin on the side of the drum. Then it would really hurt and suck and you'd be really pissed off.

Light bulbs use electricity to heat up the filament and create light.

light bulbs do not CREATE light,they KILL dark!


nothing in this world feels as good as an orgasm!

If you ever saw the movie Half Baked you would know that weed intestifies everything..... so having an orgasm feels good... but having an orgasm when your high off weed would feel better. which makes your little statement WRONG!!!!!!





If you eat some corn, someday soon you'll have corn in your shit.

mid, what are you thinking? with hallowe'en just around the corner i find it difficult to grasp that candy corn won't be dissimilated, dispersed, and otherwise disseminated throughout the human body, ergo naver making it through the peristaltic process in its original form...


now pumpkinseeds, on the other hand...

Can be spit out before they're swallowed=P

Neo(The One) tells Smith(and not Agent Smith, cuz he's no longer an agent of that system)"And what reason is that?"

Now try and prove that wrong.

WRONG cause whatever you say has to make sence to me and if it doesn't then it's not right in my book.

I'm ugly

mikey, i've heard it said that you are WAY beyond ugly; so much so, in fact, that you have come around almost full circle and turned into voluptious...


a three dog night is colder than a well-digger's belt buckle...

a three dog night can get fairly heated at times expecialy on thier concert nights on the other hand a well digger is normaly below ground where it is much cooler.

phil is an uncle