and you must live in antarctica...


clouds are made of vapor...

suspended particles bring the rain.

Water is life.

But you can drown in it, so water is deadly.

Where there's smoke, there's a fire.

Sometimes where there's smoke there is no flame.

Imagination burns.

To burn you must have carbon compounds in the presence of oxygen. The imagination is not made up of carbon, but is rather an emergent property of the interaction of neurons. YOU'RE WRONG.

I'm right.

not enough information; you could be left or, worse yet, a centrist...too wishy-washy to be right...

rainwater is wet...

If one is small enough to fit between the water droplets, then one will not become wet. Which means that you're wrong.


If you drink too much blue Kool-Aid, after a meal, you will shit green.

"Too much" is subjective. I'm allergic to blue kool-aid, so I would have "too much" long before my shit turning green.

I have a penis.

and queen victoria has a vagina...

trees leave...

Only the Honduran Wandering Tree is proven to migrate. Every other one is stationary.

I have five fingers (Including the thumb) on my right hand.

You have four fingers, and a thumb. Unless you're extradextrous.

Money is made out of cloth in America.

well, american "paper" money is made out of approximately 75% denim. so it's not entirely made of cloth.


Boobies are great.

You are wrong. If boobies get to big, they can cause back problems. They also give you cancer and kill you.

The Cubs suck.

au contraire, mon frere...

the cubs blow...

one and one and one are three...

(Why does the wind always blow in the Dakotas?)

Sometimes "one" is a multitude, misguided. You can't ever tell what it adds up to.

Change always happens.

Change is nothing but a loose form of currency. It has not always existed, and will probably cease to exist in the future. Thus it will not always happen.

Jesus was white.

Wrong! Jesus was not white, as I will prove to you.

1) Jesus was killed and came back to life from the dead. (According to the Christian faith)

2) Those who die and come back from the dead are zombies.

3) Jesus was a zombie.

4) Zombies are composed of rotting flesh.

5) Rotting flesh is black.

6) Jesus was black.


I have severe mental problems.

uh-oh.
I've been forced to wonder about you.

Is severious a word?

Chlorophyll is green.

Chlorophyll isn't green. See it in the dark, and it will appear in a different colour altogether.

Yeti exists.

Well, of course you exist!

Advertising tries to be compelling.

Unless it's annoying.

Black is dark.

Black is a color; it can be dark, but that is suffice to say it depends on one's meaning of dark. I personally think Dr. No is dark, yet at last check, he was not also black. So there you have it.


The Simpsons, an animated primetime feature show aired regularly on Fox broadcasting, was the brainchild and ultimate creation of cartoonist, Matt Groening.

I dunno. I'm afraid of the dark, but I'm not afraid of black.

Milk does a body good.

Arg, two questions?! Must pick one...

Sure, Milk is good for you, but those are just annoying advertisements trying to compel you into buying milk. You'll be better off with some dark green veggies and water. Less fat, and more fiber (but not as tasty)

Sleeping is restful.

Unless you have dreams of being chased down by a crazy man. :D

African twigs are as effective as toothbrushes.

yeah, right, if you're a freakin' gorilla...

stormy weather precludes rain...

not always the case, mon frere... stromy weather could be classified as fire and brimstone as well, not the usual water.

Albert Einstein was a German Jew, as well as a proclaimed genius.

And it took a long time for him to learn to tie his shoes.

Small dogs are yappy at strangers

Unless the stranger eats them.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

And sometimes, dynamite can be found in sandwitches.

Sugar is sweet.

Except to those who can't taste it.

Glass is not a solid.

Glass is an amorphous solid of indeterminate phase, but leaning strongly towards the solid side of the spectrum. In other words, glass is difficult to class as a solid purely because it does not form a crystal lattice; on the other hand, it has no demonstrable viscosity and does not evaporate, meaning it is clearly not a liquid. It would be proper to place glass in it's own phase between solid and liquid, however if we insist on using the three traditional forms of matter (solid, liquid, gas) then glass can be classified as a solid on the basis of exclusion, as it is clearly neither liquid nor gas. Compare and contrast with pitch, which appears to be a solid but is in actuality a highly viscous fluid.

Radio waves are a form of energy.

Utilized energy? If I could use them to run my car I could go the speed of light. Or thereabouts...

Someone's been fiddling with the dates of posting.

Do you have such proof to substantiate these alleged claims?

Though, I wonder... :surprised:


Potassium is highly reactive and flammable

Unless it's in a banana. :D

The United States only developed three atom bombs. One was used as a test and the other two were dropped on Japan.

wrong, the United States is inanimate and a man made point of reference, therefore it is only an illusion. moreso, there are cd and song titles "Atom Bomb" from within and without that point of reference.

Racists suck.

Yes, but the Gay ones are far better at it.

The ancestors of Whales were land animals.

Couldn't be more wrong. Everyone knows that whales, as with all life on earth, came from Mars on a meteor-like chunk of debri. Meteor-like chunks of debri could hardly be called land animals *pfft*.


The pyramids were supposed to be cubes.

the pyramids would be but, alas, they buried the lower half so all we see are four sides...

debris is a six-letter word...

Actually, debris would be more accurately defined as the scattered remains of rubble or wreckage.

Everyone loves a Slinky.

I don't.

We are all different.

There are differences in people but we all have 2 eyes, 2 ears, 1 nose, 2 hands ,2 feet , 10 toes , 10 fingers etc etc. So maybe we are more the same than different.......

I think therefore I am

I'm pretty sure one can be even without thinking.

Everyone has the same amount of time to use.

while the finite amount of time in a day is equal for all, the level of free time in one's day is a far more accurate way to measure one's ability to accomplish desires.

wants and desires are the same thing.

not when they involve small farm animals...


relativity is a theory...

Yeah, except that we can observe that everything is relative.

The only constant in life is change.

Living is a constant in life as well, because if we ceased to live we wouldn't live so it wouldn't be living anymore? You get it.

The only one in control of yourself is you.

not when you're in handcuffs...


one and one and one is three...

Heh-the number of hairy legs I have.

People are mean to each other.

I try not to be.

skunks stink.

Except when they don't feel threatened. They smell like roses then.

Pi is the only real number.

Pi isn't even the only irrational number, let alone the only real number.

Water is non-toxic.

au contrere, mon frere:

http://www.nbc11.com/news/10762819/detail.html

paper is made from wood pulp...

And a cosiderable variety of other substances.

There is a water cycle.

Not unless your girl's really, really anemic.

Snakes have no armpits.

Then how is that they created an entire style of Kung Fu that fully utilizes the powerful and deadly-quick strikes of the fore limbs without actual use of them?

They didn't because they did, and vice-versa.



An apple a day keeps the doctor away.

Actaully, that's a rounding error. One apple will keep 22 doctors away for one hour, so an apple a day keeps 0.9167 doctors away.

The speed of light is invariant regardless of the motion of the observer relative to the light source.

Um, you're leaving out such variables as the speed of light as it travels through rice paper, and the like, which reduces the speed of light by varying degrees based on factors such as paper translucency, number of sheets between point A and point B, the angle of the sheets, etc.


Geoffrey Chaucer (1343 - 1400), author of The Canterbury Tales, is considered the Father of English Poetry.

Geoffrey Chaucer failed as a bugger.

You might wonder more.

This might be true if life were infinitely prolonged, however, while 10% of the human brain attends to daily life and only wonders occasionally, a further 10% wonders all day and all night throughout our lives, and the remaining 80% of the brain functions to keep one from noticing this. If one did, one would wander round all day with a face splitting smile saying, "Wow, man, like, just, wow," every 15 minutes or so, like a devoted cannabis enthusiast.

I don't trust you any farther than I can sling a piano.

The statement doesn't make sense so is negated

E=MC2

nonononononononononono, it was wayne kramer and the mc5...

I will return to E = MC (squared)
Once it is thus, so the energy dissipates, cubing was his next baby.
His wife was onto it.

Mayans dance to algorithms keeping a sense of circular irony.

That turns out not to be the case. While the aboriginal terpsichorean impulse of Mesoamerica was both prescriptive and self referential, it was and remains quite sincere. Any irony there is brought to it with the observer and leaves the same way.

Rudy Giuliani has carnal knowledge of farm animals.

The jury is still out on that one, we can't get the cow to spill the milk if ya know what I mean.


Fog and hoarfrost are first cousins.

False - Hoarfrost is the Child of Fog by Cold

Area = Pi R Squared

True in circles.

Life is spherical.

False, of course. That is a very limited perspective since a sphere is three dimensional and life is at least five.

Time is on my side.

Wrong! Time is only a construct, which means it won't be on your side because it belongs in the hands of everyone and no one!

Castles that fall from the sky always land on all four dungeons.

false - castles falling from the sky tend more to land on the tallest tower, in which a princess is usually being held captive

I am legend

true ...in your own mind.

A trebuchet would make a fun new kids' ride.

False, I believe parents would obtain more pleasure flinging their
offspring to another county, ( fantasy only)

Somone explained to you what Farenheit 451 meant before you read the book.

True, since I will never read it.

History is much different than herstory.

true, her story never matches mine

love is a many splendored thing

It gets better if you let it.

We became, uncreated.

Absolutely incorrect. We were not uncreated.

We created God so that She could create us.

/ And bother me not with such trifles as causality
/ Why create a time bound God?
/ Don't you already have a mother who travels the fourth dimension in one direction only?

no, my mom likes to stay home and cook

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven...

Oh so very wrong. Some counter examples:
Fran Drescher as Carmen at the Met.
Paris Hilton, the new Emily Post.
Tofu Pizza.
President Coulter.
Breast Reduction Surgery.

The incidence of suicide bombing as a tactic in Islamic insurrectionary conflicts stems from the sequestration of Muslim women and the practice of plural marriage among well-to-do Muslim men.

True, with a peculiar bluishness.

Green means go.

>BUZZ< Incorrect. Money is the root of all evil and and therefore how can you support an evil concept like greenbacks? This philosophy is rightly applied in China where red lights means go, green lights means stop.

The sun will rise tomorrow.

Wrong! The sun doesn't "rise," the earth revolves around it!


Water is the essence of life.

Then why is it that too many other lifeforms, including human beings, drown and die in the water if it is originally meant to sustain our living status? Contradictory point. (in addition to knowing that saltwater actually makes us sick, and we have no earthly tolerances to retrieve freshwater from the icecaps without substantiable reinforcements in technology and aid to do so, but we go about filtering the bad from good to spare us that trouble).


"Nature abhors a vacuum"

Wrong. That's the pathetic fallacy right there. Nature doesn't abhor anything. It does, however, tend to fill a vacuum.

The human eye can distinguish up to approximately 256 shades of grey between white and black.

false ...to my own surprise.
At best the human eye can only distinguish about 50 scales of gray between black and white: ...why does this link about vision have "fuck you eye" phonetically in the address?
http://faculty-web.at.northwestern.e...eeing%20is.pdf


The typical human ear is sensitive to pressure variations less than one billionth of atmospheric pressure. (ps: my wife must speak quieter than that)

Capability and likelihood are too opposing concepts. Although it is true the human eardrums are capable of such feats, in all likelihood, the typical human possesses less apt resources to fully-realize such an epitome because of external influences factored in since birth. At best, the average adult (aged 26, living in a town/city resembling Topeka, Kansas) has a threshhold for hearing slight disimilitudes of about one par near 825 millionths atms (sepacles rounded to existing conditions throughout). With such conditions involved, I am inclined to insist that your previous statement is incorrect, whilst substituing my own for the affirmation. :surprised:



A lion's lungs are not filled with air.

It is most wearisome to say incorrect.
The self integration concept of Chi-Kung and Tigers Breath
is all that comes to focus.


Spending too much time in a sensory deprivation tank will drive you insane.

How often can one be wrong in this place?

When properly prepared for (meaning, you know you are going into the tank), sensory deprivation experiences are quite enlightening as to the inner working of your mind. Only when abused and forced on unsuspecting people can it cause ill-effects as the mind is unaware of what has happened to the normal buzz of stimuli. The movie Altered States will drive you stark-raving-mad, regardless.

Gravity is a fictitious force.

What the hell's a matter with all you people! This whole place is just "wrong"!!! I've spent plenty good money on my car just so I could feel more fictitious forces, so don't tell me they're not real!


Space-time would be so nice and smooth if all this crap wasn't in the universe.

This sounds like a dark-matter problem, easily remedied by factoring out the inherent emotional worm-holes that will keep us tethered unto and under
umbillicals, not to skirt however, smooth yes...but nice and smooth does not
offer interest...resistance may be futile but alas necessary for contrast
and comparison. You may be right, but do you want to be?


With enough patience you could teach Edward Scissor Hands, the fine art
of back scratching.

No no no no no no no.
Edward Scissorhands is imaginary, a fiction, a fant'sy and figment, he cannot be taught because he cannot learn, because he does not exist except in the minds of topiary fetishists.

Negotiation is the is the art of interchanging mountains and molehills.

au contraire, mon frere, negotiation is the art of selling a person a ticket to hell while ensuring that he looks forward to the trip...

ice is frozen water...

No, water is mearly melted ice.

Fire is hot.

Pfft, hot to what? Where do you even base such accusations? Just because you think fire is hot, fire is hot to other things too? How egocentric.

The Earth goes around the Sun.

That massively oversimplifies the issue. As all celestial bodies are constantly in motion, the Earth's 'orbit' (such as it is) is actually a very complex movement. Thus, while it's not entirely inaccurate to state that the Earth performs a solar revolution on an annual basis, that doesn't even begin to tell the full story and could be therefore deemed a lie of omission.

Life is what you make it.

Wrong, life is what it is.

You are responsible for your own perceptions.

Pfft, tell that to the last person you slipped a mickey.

Do onto others as you would have done unto you.

so, you would jerk other people off?

it's important to eat well and exercise

You said onto not unto, and any jail-house lawyer could and probably
would tear and twist your sincere statement into an untold
amount of shreds, leaving you shaken and witless.


We learn from our mistakes.

we have a doubly bubbly here, how to fix?

Well, by learning from our mistakes, of course.

The horse became domesticated only after it was large enough to be useful.

Eohippus was somewhat larger than a rabbit. If being an ingredient in hasenpfeffer isn't useful, I don't know what useful means. (Garcon, two Belmont Steaks, medium-rare, with peppercorn sauce, please.)

Tiny slugs keep ones eyelashes more or less free of debris.

You are confusing slugs with 'Demodex Folliculorum'
common mistake.

The rattlesnakes are tired of tasting like chickens.