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Old 02-09-2004, 09:36 PM   #1 (permalink)
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The Official "Ask Stiltzkin" thread (jumping on the bandwagon)

Feel free to ask me anything. I do have an answer to ALL of your questions!
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Old 02-09-2004, 09:43 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Will you have sex with me if I give you a McGriddle?
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Old 02-09-2004, 10:04 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Munku:
Most likely. Can I have a McGriddle with lots of extra cheese?
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Old 02-09-2004, 10:16 PM   #4 (permalink)
* * *
 
How should I relieve my stress tonight?
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Innominate.
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Old 02-09-2004, 10:23 PM   #5 (permalink)
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wilbjammin:
Couple of suggestions
1.) Furious masturbation
2.) Gaze at the stars for a while
3.) Get wasted (actually, I don't think this *really* relieves stress)
4.) Sleep

Hope this helps
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Old 02-09-2004, 10:26 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: this ain't kansas, toto
are you really jumping? or do you just need to go pee real badly?
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Old 02-09-2004, 10:33 PM   #7 (permalink)
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bernadette:
I'm jumping? Whoa. ::notices that he is jumping:: ::runs to the restroom::
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Old 02-09-2004, 11:21 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: this ain't kansas, toto
The Official "Ask Stiltzkin" thread (<b>jumping</b> on the bandwagon)

ahem. jumping.

so... um... did everything come out okay?
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Old 02-09-2004, 11:21 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Who's your daddy?
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Old 02-09-2004, 11:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
.
 
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Location: Tokyo
who's sexier... Astrocloud or Munky?
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Old 02-10-2004, 07:57 AM   #11 (permalink)
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bernadette:
Yes, everything came out just fine. Thanks

Astrocloud:
The man who I call dad

bundy:
Why would you choose one over the other? They're both sexay beasts!
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Old 02-10-2004, 08:18 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Why do my robots inspire fear?
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Old 02-10-2004, 08:23 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: Ohio! yay!
I'll ask this here because it seems like Halx is swamped...

How would I start out in the "Porn Star Business"? BTW I am hung like a spider...
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Old 02-10-2004, 12:02 PM   #14 (permalink)
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How long is Halx's penis (since he won't answer)?
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Old 02-10-2004, 08:48 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Astrocloud:
Your robots inspire fear because they are just that: the most fearsome robots evar~!


crackprogram:
I don't know how reliable this is, but here ya go!
http://www.getinstarjobbusiness.com/job8.htm


redlemon:
Halx's penis is as long as you want it to be, redlemon
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Last edited by Stiltzkin; 02-10-2004 at 10:22 PM..
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Old 02-10-2004, 09:09 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Location: this ain't kansas, toto
why do men care about another man's penis size?
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Old 02-10-2004, 10:21 PM   #17 (permalink)
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bernadette:
Because we are insecure about our own penis size... which is why we drive sports cars (now if only I had enough cash to buy a sports car...)
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Old 02-10-2004, 10:38 PM   #18 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
Why is it so hard to pry a peanut-butter and whitebread sandwich off the roof of your mouth with your tongue?
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:21 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Fremen:
Because both peanut-butter and whitebread are super absorbent and they suck all the moisture out of yer mouth, which is bad...
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:08 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Why do you rule so much, Stiltzkin?
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:13 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Location: this ain't kansas, toto
OMG can you legally ask yourself a question this thread?

and... what should i have for dinner tonight?
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:16 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Stiltzkin:
I went to the University of Pwnology, and got a degree in pwning major ass. Glad that you noticed

bernadette:
Yes, I can legally ask myself questions in this thread. Totally awesome huh?
And for dinner... how about some pizza? If you're not into eating meat... how about a vegetarian pizza?
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Last edited by Stiltzkin; 02-11-2004 at 06:20 PM..
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:25 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: this ain't kansas, toto
where is the university of pwnology located? how long did it take you to complete a degree in pwning major ass? is that a 4 yr program?

awesome? oui mon cher. totally!

pizza? hrmm perhaps... perhaps.....

omg... i am also allowed to answer questions in this thread? ...uh cuz i kinda did... a little. kinda sorta anyway.
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:31 PM   #24 (permalink)
.
 
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Location: Tokyo
Stiltzy, how come you didn't win a grammy this year?
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:35 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Was denken sie über dem Deutschish problem?
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Old 02-11-2004, 06:53 PM   #26 (permalink)
.
 
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stiltzy, are you really Enya's lovechild?
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Old 02-11-2004, 07:51 PM   #27 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
If you strapped a buttered slice of bread to the back of a cat, and dropped them off of a building, what would happen?
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Old 02-11-2004, 07:55 PM   #28 (permalink)
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bernadette:
The University of Pwnology is located in Utah, the place on this Earth that pwns the least...
which is why they intentionally built the college there (ya know, to make it extremely ironic )

It did indeed take me four years to graduate and become a pwnz0r in practice.

Also, yes, you are allowed to answer any question in this thread! I will still answer all questions though, regardless if someone else has answered it before me

bundy:
I did not win a grammy this year because I have given up such childish pursuits since I won my last grammy

Astrocloud:
Can you rephrase the question? I was not able to pick any meaning out of that babble.
If it was just that, babble, then my answer is: battle fish

bundy:
Thank you for asking two questions.
Yes, I am really Enya's love child. I am her child and she loves me.

Fremen:
Buttered toast has a 50/50 chance of landing on either side. However... a cat has almost 100% of landing on its own feet, so the cat would land safely on it's feet and the bread... would lose
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:21 PM   #29 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
Who said buttered toast?

It's a known fact buttered bread, once dropped, ALWAYS lands buttered side down.
Now, if you strap it buttered side up on the back of a cat and dropped them from a considerable height, the laws of butterology and felineology would try to come into play.
Since we know they're both trying to act within their own respective laws, it's safe to say that the two laws effectively cancel each other out, thereby causing the cat and the bread to hover, or 'float' if you will, in mid-air.

It's the same with jam or jelly.

Any questions?
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:27 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Fremen:
I see that you are well-versed in the sciences of buttered bread, and felineology. If in fact the rules of butterology and felineology are true, then may it also be possible to assume that the fabric of time and space would be torn like a pair of scissors through mud? (that made no sense) I would like to speculate that half of the toast and half of the cat would then be warped into the fifth dimension! There, the cat could land on its feet and the toast could lay butter-side-down, while strapped to eachother facing opposite, and co-exist peacefully. Who knew?
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:35 PM   #31 (permalink)
With a mustache, the cool factor would be too much
 
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Location: left side of my couch, East Texas
It's possible, it's possible.
I guess this dimension fabric-ripping keeps turning the bread into toast, too.


Okay, next question:
Is it possible for Saturday Night Live to still be funny?
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:37 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Fremen:
D'oh! Yes... yes actually it does turn bread into toast. Heh.

It is possible for SNL to be funny on rare occasions when you are feeling sick, and are therefore particularly vulnerable to situations which would not otherwise be humorous.
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Last edited by Stiltzkin; 02-11-2004 at 08:41 PM..
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:39 PM   #33 (permalink)
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Was ist sien "Battle Fish"?
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Old 02-11-2004, 08:45 PM   #34 (permalink)
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Astrocloud:
Hai! ::bows::
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Old 02-12-2004, 07:46 PM   #35 (permalink)
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Nobody wants to ask me questions anymore
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Old 02-12-2004, 09:02 PM   #36 (permalink)
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Location: Tokyo
why do you think that?
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Old 02-13-2004, 09:42 AM   #37 (permalink)
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bundy:
Because my thread disappeared into the abysses of the Nonsense forum, until I saved it
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Old 02-13-2004, 10:51 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Are boogers salty?
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Old 02-13-2004, 11:30 AM   #39 (permalink)
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Location: Boston
Why are there people like Frank?
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Old 02-13-2004, 09:24 PM   #40 (permalink)
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Astrocloud:
Yes, boogers are highly salty. They are in fact a rich source of salt

monkeydriven:
There are people like Frank because there are Frank like people
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