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Old 09-22-2006, 10:13 AM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
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Fresh from the presses

Just saw this today--it's not a joke, but it sure made me laugh. Can't swear that it's true, but it's weird enough to be.

Quote:
Ok, so some of you may remember that the other day I posted about my car being broken into. The theives broke out a small back window but there was still a bunch of shattered glass around the hole they punched through. I had these dirty boxers in my car and used them to cover my hand so i could knock out the rest of the glass and clean up the big pieces on the floor of the car.

Fast-forward to last night... i had a slight buzz going on and adjourned to the bedroom for a pre-sleep jackoff session. Obviously not thinking, I grabbed the pair of boxers off the top of my hamper as I usually do, not noticing that these were the boxers I used to clean up the glass. I then had a mediocre orgasm and used the glass-boxers as a cum rag

I didn't notice any pain last night, but today my dick kept itching and whenever it would brush against my boxers, i would get a sharp-ass pain. I didn't realize what had happened until I looked closely and saw a few slivers sticking out I was able to pull a few out but I can tell there are still a couple in the shaft, one in my nutsack, and one in the taint. This is a fucking nightmare, I am so uncomfortable and I can't see any of the slivers so I can't get them out. This is probably one of the worst things I've ever done.

Hold me.
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Old 09-22-2006, 10:32 AM   #2 (permalink)
We work alone
 
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Location: Cake Town
Dude...

Ugh...

*shudder*
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Old 09-22-2006, 10:47 AM   #3 (permalink)
Junkie
 
Shenanigans ...

Automobile glass does not break up into slivers. It "pebbles" to avoid problems similar to this. I suppose it might have been a very old car.

Since this is a joke I suppose some suspension of disbelief is required; but I can't really do that within the context of this joke for some reason.
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Old 09-22-2006, 11:07 AM   #4 (permalink)
Mistress of Mayhem
 
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Location: Canton, Ohio
Tee hee..... being a woman I find this giggle worthy but I also understand the pain part. Always be non buzzed when giving self pleasure. *Giggle*
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Old 09-22-2006, 02:03 PM   #5 (permalink)
Cunning Runt
 
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Location: Taking a mulligan
Quote:
Originally Posted by vanblah
Shenanigans ...

Automobile glass does not break up into slivers. It "pebbles" to avoid problems similar to this. I suppose it might have been a very old car.

Since this is a joke I suppose some suspension of disbelief is required; but I can't really do that within the context of this joke for some reason.
I had the same thought, but I suspended disbelief and gave him points for creative writing. I'll bet some of the suggested "remedies" from other people were, shall I say, "dubious."
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Old 09-22-2006, 02:07 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time
LOL!

I love it
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