Classified Ads
 

Actually Taken From Classified Ads In Newspapers:

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG. BITES.

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG.

FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD, PART STUPID DOG.

GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.

FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. LOOKS LIKE A RAT... BEEN OUT AWHILE... BETTER BE A REWARD.

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE... ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY.

GEORGIA PEACHES, CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.
NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE.

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 -- $9 PER HOUR.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS -$175.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.

ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER.

OPEN HOUSE: BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON. FREE COFFEE & DONUTS.

FOR SALE BY OWNER: COMPLETE SET OF ENCYCLOPEDIA BRITTANICA. 45 VOLUMES.EXCELLENT CONDITION. $1,000.00 OR BEST OFFER. NO LONGER NEEDED. GOT MARRIED LAST MONTH...WIFE KNOWS EVERYTHING.

Re: Classified Ads
 

Now that one cracked me up :)

Um... WTF??

Das ARF! Voof! Achtung: Bark!

Aaron A. Aardvark - Builders. Not very good, but first in the book.

hehehehe

Great stuff :)

Wife knows everything....funny stuff. True, but funny

free german speaking dog huh.

He He

good stuff, Bill!

ratbastid

I had a dog like that, he was trained for security and only took commands in German

those were good...love the bull one!

lol good stuff

Good ones...loved the sneaky neighbors dog