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Old 08-30-2009, 03:39 AM   #1 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Love Is Blind

Ed and Dorothy met while on a singles cruise and Ed fell head over heels for her. When they discovered they lived in the same city only a few miles apart Ed was ecstatic. He immediately started asking her out when they got home.

Within a couple of weeks, Ed had taken Dorothy to dance clubs, restaurants, concerts, movies, and museums. Ed became convinced that Dorothy was indeed his soul mate and true love. Every date seemed better than the last.

On the one-month anniversary of their first dinner on the cruise ship, Ed took Dorothy to a fine restaurant. While having cocktails and waiting for their salad, Ed said, "I guess you can tell I'm very much in love with you. I'd like a little serious talk before our relationship continues to the next stage. So, before I get a box out of my jacket and ask you a life changing question, it's only fair to warn you, I'm a total golf nut. I play golf. I read about golf. I watch golf on TV. In short, I eat, sleep, and breathe golf. If that's going to be a problem, for us, you'd better say so now!"

Dorothy took a deep breath and responded, "Ed, that certainly won't be a problem. I love you as you are and I love golf too; but, since we're being totally honest with each other, you need to know that about the last five years I've been a hooker."

"Oh wow! I see," Ed replied. He looked down at the table, and was quiet for a moment, deep in thought then he added.

"You know, it's probably just because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you tee off."
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you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Last edited by uncle phil; 08-30-2009 at 03:44 AM..
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Old 08-30-2009, 04:45 AM   #2 (permalink)
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
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Location: Southern England
Very good.
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╔═════════════════════════════════════════╗
Overhead, the Albatross hangs motionless upon the air,
And deep beneath the rolling waves,
In labyrinths of Coral Caves,
The Echo of a distant time
Comes willowing across the sand;
And everthing is Green and Submarine

╚═════════════════════════════════════════╝
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Old 08-30-2009, 10:22 AM   #3 (permalink)
Found my way back
 
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I chuckled, but mandy didn't get it.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The_Jazz
Ok - can I edit my posts to read "what healer said"?
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Old 08-30-2009, 10:43 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: My head.
**chortle**
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Old 08-30-2009, 10:55 AM   #5 (permalink)
Master Thief. Master Criminal. Masturbator.
 
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Location: Windiwana
nice

a golf joke that i enjoyed.
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Then they came for the communists and I did not speak out because I was not a communist.
Then they came for the trade unionists and I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for me And there was no one left to speak out for me.
-Pastor Martin Niemoller
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Old 08-31-2009, 06:26 AM   #6 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Golf clap for the golf joke.
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Old 09-02-2009, 02:30 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Location: Above you
That's so awesome, I love golf stories and I don't even play golf.
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