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Old 07-11-2003, 12:18 PM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Comments in the report cards

Actual comments made by teachers on their students report cards as part of
their final narratives. All teachers were reprimanded, but these are
great!

1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to
dig.

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.

4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to
achieve them.

6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold
it
all together.

7. This child has been working with glue too much.

8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.

9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't
coming.

10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a
week.

11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out
1,000,000 others.
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Old 07-11-2003, 05:54 PM   #2 (permalink)
Junkie
 
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Location: Midwest
Very good. Thanks.
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Old 07-11-2003, 11:42 PM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: San Diego, CA
love the last one
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Old 07-12-2003, 12:52 AM   #4 (permalink)
MSD
The sky calls to us ...
 
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Super Moderator
Location: CT
I've seen this elsewhere as comments on performance reviews for jobs.
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Old 07-12-2003, 10:13 AM   #5 (permalink)
Crazy
 
2. I would not allow this student to breed. --If only that could be made into a law.
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Old 07-12-2003, 01:51 PM   #6 (permalink)
Know Where!
 
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lol
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Old 07-28-2003, 08:04 PM   #7 (permalink)
Hiding Out
 
I've known a few people who fit those descriptions...
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Old 07-28-2003, 08:07 PM   #8 (permalink)
Eccentric insomniac
 
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Location: North Carolina
I am thinking of teaching for a couple years so I can stay in town until my girlfriend gets out of college. I am going to use every single one of these.
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Old 07-29-2003, 07:26 AM   #9 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: MS
Dang they aren't holding back these days
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Old 07-29-2003, 10:42 AM   #10 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: East Tenn
lol
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Old 07-29-2003, 01:55 PM   #11 (permalink)
Upright
 
Those were great!
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Old 07-29-2003, 10:16 PM   #12 (permalink)
Eh?
 
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Location: Somewhere over the rainbow
yeah 11 is the best
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