mortius

A guy boards a train bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He immediately notices that the guy next to him has a deeply bruised, black eye. "Heck, what a coincidence! We both have black eyes! Mind if I ask how you got yours?"

"Well," explains the man, "I was at the ticket counter and this gorgeous blonde with beautiful breasts was behind the counter. When I asked to purchase a ticket to Pittsburgh, I accidentally blurted out 'I'd like a picket to Tittsburgh' and so she sucker-punched me!" The man continues, "What's your story?"

The other guy explains, "I was at the breakfast table and I meant to say to my wife, 'Please pour me a bowl of Wheaties,' but I accidentally said, 'You ruined my life you stupid bitch.'"

LaZy

heh, good one.

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Ideas pull the trigger, but instinct loads the gun.

I know who you are!

ssander9

Hey Hey....Good one

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I never said you had to.

Regziever

Hehe.. oldie but goldie!!

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Life is shit,
Death is even worse,
So what's the point of killing yourself?
/Ignatius Camryn Paladine

-Anders

Hahahah, pure gold

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Signature 101

tfpfreak

Dont you hate that when that happens!!!

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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be.

~ Clementine Paddleford

fester

heh, funny one!