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Old 04-19-2003, 03:45 AM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: Shoe (the one owned by the lady with lots of kids)
Kids say the darndest things... (these kids can't be human)!!!

The following questions and answers were collated from a test given in 2001 in Springdale, Arkansas to 16 year old students!

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g. abdomen.)
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O and U.

Q: What is the Fibula
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section."
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.

Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is its characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs




Hope all you people enjoy - its not some of my best stuff - but it is just stuff that i can remember off the top of my head and as more comes up - i'll whap it down.
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Old 04-19-2003, 04:03 AM   #2 (permalink)
Delicious
 
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Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs

muhaha they say 16 is when most kids start using drugs...
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Old 04-19-2003, 04:41 AM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
Wow I loved question 2. They all seemed pretty fake but that didn't make them less funny. dead sheep and canoeists?! That's so goofy it's great.
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Old 04-19-2003, 07:39 AM   #4 (permalink)
Fly
see the links to my music?
 
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Location: Beautiful British Columbia
funny as all hell

kids eh.........
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Old 04-19-2003, 08:45 AM   #5 (permalink)
Psycho
 
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Now it makes me wonder...were some serious, and some being smart-alacs? :P
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Old 04-19-2003, 09:01 AM   #6 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Dallas, TX
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Hahahahaha
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Old 04-19-2003, 09:15 AM   #7 (permalink)
RaZ
Crazy
 
Q: What is the Fibula
A: A small lie.

Good stuff
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Old 04-19-2003, 10:26 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: back home again...
the five bowels....

hilarious!
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Old 04-20-2003, 02:25 AM   #9 (permalink)
Yo dawg, I herd u like...
 
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Location: memes.
I live in ark,and yeah,most of the people were being smart asses
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Old 04-20-2003, 02:48 AM   #10 (permalink)
Sky Piercer
 
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Location: Ireland
I agree....can't be taken seriously, but that doesn't stop it being any less funny!

-C.S. Flim
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Old 05-10-2003, 01:45 PM   #11 (permalink)
Junkie
 
those kids should stop sleeping in class
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Old 05-10-2003, 02:10 PM   #12 (permalink)
Hiding Out
 
Note the kids were from Arkansas!!!!

Good list !
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Old 05-10-2003, 03:10 PM   #13 (permalink)
Insane
 
love those
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