Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 09-08-2003, 03:29 AM   #1 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
uncle phil's Avatar
 
Super Moderator
Location: upstate
Kid Play v.2

KIDS ON MARRIAGE


HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHOM TO MARRY?

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming."
Alan, age 10

"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with."
Kirsten, age 10


WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then."
Camille, age 10

"No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married."
Freddie, age 6


HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

"Married people usually look happy to talk to other people."
Eddie, age 6

"You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids."
Derrick, age 8


WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

"Both don't want no more kids."
Lori, age 8


WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough."
Lynnette, age 8

"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date."
Martin, age 10


WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

"I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns."
Craig, age 9


WHEN IS IT OK TO KISS SOMEONE?

"When they're rich."
Pam, age 7

"The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that."
Curt, age 7

"The rule goes like this: if you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do."
Howard, age 8


IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

"I don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing. I'm never going to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed out."
Theodore, age 8

"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them."
Anita, age 9

"Single is better, for the simple reason that I wouldn't want to change no diapers. Of course, if I did get married, I'd just phone my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper-changing."
Kirsten, age 10


HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

"There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?"
Kelvin, age 8

"You can be sure of one thing - the boys would come chasing after us just the same as they do now."
Roberta, age 7


HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

"If you want to last with your man, you should wear a lot of sexy clothes, especially underwear that is red and maybe has a few diamonds on it."
Lori, age 8

"Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck."
Ricky, age 7
__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
uncle phil is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 03:38 AM   #2 (permalink)
Fast'n'Bulbous
 
Location: Australia, Perth
"Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck."

i think i like that one the best
Sleepyjack is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 04:23 PM   #3 (permalink)
Sarge of Blood Gulch Red Outpost Number One
 
archer2371's Avatar
 
Location: On the front lines against our very enemy
Kid's say the darndest things don't they?
__________________
"This ain't no Ice Cream Social!"

"Hey Grif, Chupathingy...how bout that? I like it...got a ring to it."

"I have no earthly idea what it is I just saw, or what this place is, or where in the hell O'Malley is! My only choice is to blame Grif for coming up with such a flawed plan. Stupid, stupid Grif."
archer2371 is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 04:31 PM   #4 (permalink)
Loser
 
damnit ricky age 7 just summed up how to make every relationship work...ever
goatse is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 05:34 PM   #5 (permalink)
Junkie
 
cchris's Avatar
 
Location: Sydney
That Ricky is gonna go far.

Top stuff
__________________
There's a fine line between participation and mockery
cchris is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 05:42 PM   #6 (permalink)
Insane
 
Great post. Loved the answers the kids could come up with. Some of them already know more about marriage than I ever will.
steelerz is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 06:53 PM   #7 (permalink)
Psycho
 
rofl, gg ricky
Flesh is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 07:13 PM   #8 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: A fuzzy cloud.
Thanks, that was cute.
Realizm is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 07:22 PM   #9 (permalink)
Sexy eh?
 
Location: Sweden
Hehehe! Man "out of the mouths of children comes the greatest wisdom"... Awesome post!
__________________
Life is shit,
Death is even worse,
So what's the point of killing yourself?
/Ignatius Camryn Paladine
Regziever is offline  
Old 09-08-2003, 07:44 PM   #10 (permalink)
Psycho
 
tommy thompson's Avatar
 
Those are PRICELESS...
__________________
...a wandering soul...
tommy thompson is offline  
Old 09-09-2003, 01:35 AM   #11 (permalink)
Crazy
 
I liked the "There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?"

And a lot of those kids used the word sex. When I was 8 and 9 I didn't know what sex was. Well, I knew the word but not the meaning. All I knew was it made babies.
microdot is offline  
 

Tags
kid, play

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 01:44 AM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 356 357 358 359 360