We Really Can't Win! - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

rmarshall · 11-30-2003, 09:46 AM

A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die."
As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms.
While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?"
"No!" she shrieked, aghast.
So, he dropped her.
As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked.
"Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself.
He dropped her, too.
The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic.
"Slut!" he said, and dropped her.

Laladien · 12-02-2003, 12:14 AM

Heh, I've heard that one before, but it is still pretty funny!

moose · 12-02-2003, 12:26 AM

hahaha... ive never heard this one... i liked it though

Lloyd · 12-02-2003, 06:34 AM

Evil Milkman · 12-02-2003, 06:45 AM

Very cute, I like!

bravo49 · 12-03-2003, 02:32 AM

New one on me and very good

RotEx · 12-03-2003, 06:29 AM

HAhahaha nice job!

well done

uffjohn · 12-03-2003, 06:54 AM

hehe havent heard that one before

thanks

Bobdoler · 12-03-2003, 09:46 AM

damned if you do, damned if you dont!

Keg-o-Grog · 12-03-2003, 01:39 PM

aahaahaa

!!! great one, havent heard it before

microdot · 12-03-2003, 04:21 PM

One of the best I've read on this board.

gar1976 · 12-03-2003, 05:54 PM

God must hate her.

duckduck · 12-04-2003, 12:14 AM

Never heard that one before.

tritium · 12-04-2003, 10:53 AM

hahahaha! Good one.

hawkeye · 12-08-2003, 09:27 AM

oh, that's just gotta suck, getting screwed over like that
{prepares to dodge rotton fruit.}

thedrake · 12-08-2003, 12:02 PM

good joke

manias · 12-08-2003, 08:07 PM

hahaha! ive never heard this one before!

herostar · 12-08-2003, 09:57 PM

never heard it... that's funny

Akira · 12-13-2003, 08:16 PM

good one, should have gone with the first guy.

MexicanOnABike · 12-13-2003, 09:47 PM

nice! i eard a simmilar one but with a guy:

a guy falls in quick sand and is sinking. its up to his nees when a guy comes buy and tells him "i'll help you if u give me a blow job"
"Hell NO!" says the guy in the quick sand. so the other guy leave.
He's sinking up to his waist when another man comes by and tells him "i'll help you if u give me a blow job"
"I dont think so!" says the guy in the quick sand. So the other guy leaves. He's sinking up to his neck just about to drown when another man shows up. Before he can say anything, the guy in the quick sand yells "I"LL SUCK YOU!"
The other man man says "fucking fag! and steps on his head.

11-30-2003, 09:46 AM	#1 (permalink)
rmarshall Addict Location: Kingston,Ontario	We Really Can't Win! A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. "Damn, that was stupid," she thought as she fell. "What a way to die." As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her in his arms. While she looked at him in disbelieving gratitude, he asked, "Do you suck?" "No!" she shrieked, aghast. So, he dropped her. As she passed the 12th floor, another man reached out and caught her. "Do you screw?" he asked. "Of course not!" she exclaimed before she could stop herself. He dropped her, too. The poor woman prayed to God for one more chance. As luck would have it, she was caught a third time, by a man on the eighth floor. "I suck! I screw!" she screamed in panic. "Slut!" he said, and dropped her.

12-02-2003, 12:14 AM	#2 (permalink)
Laladien Tilted Location: WI	Heh, I've heard that one before, but it is still pretty funny! __________________ http://www.deeko.com/images/articles/LOTRBANNER.jpg

12-03-2003, 06:29 AM	#7 (permalink)
RotEx Crazy	HAhahaha nice job! well done __________________ everytime i turn around it is an illusion.

12-03-2003, 09:46 AM	#9 (permalink)
Bobdoler Crazy	damned if you do, damned if you dont! __________________ woot

12-03-2003, 01:39 PM	#10 (permalink)
Keg-o-Grog Insane Location: Foregin student in Texas atm.	aahaahaa !!! great one, havent heard it before __________________ I stand alone without beliefs, the only truth i know is you.

12-02-2003, 12:26 AM	#3 (permalink)
moose Crazy	hahaha... ive never heard this one... i liked it though

12-02-2003, 06:45 AM	#5 (permalink)
Evil Milkman Addict Location: Illinois	Very cute, I like!

12-03-2003, 02:32 AM	#6 (permalink)
bravo49 Junkie Location: chocolate city	New one on me and very good

12-03-2003, 06:54 AM	#8 (permalink)
uffjohn Crazy	hehe havent heard that one before thanks

12-03-2003, 04:21 PM	#11 (permalink)
microdot Crazy	One of the best I've read on this board.

12-03-2003, 05:54 PM	#12 (permalink)
gar1976 Custom User Title Location: Lurking. Under the desk.	God must hate her.

12-04-2003, 12:14 AM	#13 (permalink)
duckduck Psycho Location: Where hockey pucks run rampant	Never heard that one before. __________________ Lead me, follow me, or get out of my way!

12-04-2003, 10:53 AM	#14 (permalink)
tritium Professor of Drinkology	hahahaha! Good one. __________________ Blah.

12-08-2003, 09:27 AM	#15 (permalink)
hawkeye back from sabbatical Location: Mosptopia	oh, that's just gotta suck, getting screwed over like that {prepares to dodge rotton fruit.} __________________ You're not fat, You're just a giant ball of love, covered in anger.

12-08-2003, 12:02 PM	#16 (permalink)
thedrake Banned Location: Iowa	good joke

12-08-2003, 08:07 PM	#17 (permalink)
manias Tilted Location: Canada	hahaha! ive never heard this one before!

12-08-2003, 09:57 PM	#18 (permalink)
herostar Psycho Location: South Dakota	never heard it... that's funny __________________ Got time to chill?

12-13-2003, 08:16 PM	#19 (permalink)
Akira Crazy	good one, should have gone with the first guy. __________________ -signature

12-13-2003, 09:47 PM	#20 (permalink)
MexicanOnABike Location: up north	nice! i eard a simmilar one but with a guy: a guy falls in quick sand and is sinking. its up to his nees when a guy comes buy and tells him "i'll help you if u give me a blow job" "Hell NO!" says the guy in the quick sand. so the other guy leave. He's sinking up to his waist when another man comes by and tells him "i'll help you if u give me a blow job" "I dont think so!" says the guy in the quick sand. So the other guy leaves. He's sinking up to his neck just about to drown when another man shows up. Before he can say anything, the guy in the quick sand yells "I"LL SUCK YOU!" The other man man says "fucking fag! and steps on his head. __________________ - Movie Reviews - Ratings-