Dear Ma & Pa
 

Dear Pa & Ma,

Am well, Hope you are too. Tell brother Walt and brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m., but am getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt & Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

Men got to shave but it is not so bad, they git warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings. Like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc..., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie, and other regular food. But tell Walt & Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus your holds you till noon, when you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route" marches which the Platoon Sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. The country is nice, but awful flat.

The Sergeant is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The Captain. is like the school board. Majors and Colonels just ride around & frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt & Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk and don't move. And it ain't shooting at you, like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Be sure to tell Walt & Elmer to hurry & join before other fellers get onto this setup & come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,

Gail

Absolute classic! Was laughing all the way through....then I got to the last line! Excellent!

great setup and punch line

the whole thing's good, but yeah, i like that last bit too:)

the last part is awesome, your loving daughter

Heh heh, funny. Thanks for the post!

Tina Turner said it "Simply the Best"

Eeexcellent. :D

Hehehe.... Dem crazy country folks...

Yeehaww that der was funny.

Plus, he can skin a buck and he can run a trout line. They can't starve him out and they can't make him run.