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Old 04-17-2004, 05:12 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Sydney
One day at Church.

Announcements from actual church bulletins.

Funny stuff.

.........................................................................................................

Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.

Don't let worry kill you - let the church help.

Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

The choir will meet at the Larsen house for fun and sinning.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It is a good chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone come for a fun time.

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so.


8 new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some of the older ones.
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Old 04-17-2004, 06:04 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Location: Amish-land, PA
Makes you wonder if anybody ever reads anything out loud...
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Old 04-17-2004, 07:23 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: too far from Texas
funny stuff!
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Old 04-17-2004, 07:24 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Pittsburgh
Helloooo misplaced modifier city!
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Old 04-17-2004, 07:25 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: Lubbock, TX
got to love the way words are interpeted when the writer knows what they want to say and it dont come out that way.
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Old 04-17-2004, 07:35 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: Canada
Hehehe...
More proof that proof reading is neccesary no matter what you're doing :P
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Old 04-17-2004, 07:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Location: Central Republic of Where-in-the-Hell
Quote:
Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.


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Old 04-18-2004, 01:50 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Where hockey pucks run rampant
This reminds me to go check my final essay to avoid such emarassments,
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Old 04-18-2004, 09:08 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Stillwater, OK
Oh man, that's funny stuff!
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Old 04-18-2004, 10:00 AM   #10 (permalink)
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This one had me laughing out loud:

"This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar. "
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Old 04-18-2004, 11:34 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Location: Home sweet home
Quote:
Originally posted by CinnamonGirl


Quote:
Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.
My thoughts exactly.
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Old 04-19-2004, 07:28 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Location: Flying over your house
I think it is written exactly as the thought comes out of their mouth, not giving any time to think about what they are really saying.

either that or they are illiterate
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Old 04-19-2004, 08:28 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: San Francisco
From a church near my house:

THIS WEEK'S SERMON: WHAT IS HELL LIKE?

COME IN AND HEAR OUR CHOIR!
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