hoobajoo

Funny Proverbs

A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each child in
her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading these keep in mind that these are 6-year-olds, because the last one is quite amazing.


1. Better to be safe than......punch a 5th grader.
2. Don't bite the hand that.....looks dirty.
3. It's always darkest before.........Daylight Saving Time.
4. A miss is as good as a...................Mr.
5. If you lie down with dogs, you'll......stink in the morning.
6. Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded.
7. If at first you don't succeed......get new batteries.
8. Don't put off till tomorrow what............you put on to go to bed.
9. When the blind lead the blind...get out of the way.
10. An idle mind is...........the best way to relax.
11. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and.......you have to blow your nose.
12. Happy the bride who.........gets all the presents.
13. A penny saved is........................not much.
14. Two's company, three's.................the Musketeers.
15. There are none so blind as.........Stevie Wonder.

And the favorite:

16. Better late than...........................pregnant

doodah

hahahahaha i like 16, 13 & 9.

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sometimes.. we all just gotta rock out with our cock out and hang out with our wang out... its just how it is....

TheJig

Those are really good, alot of them would make a damn good signature.

"There are none so blind as ... Stevie Wonder" lol

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"Jenny, tell me, do you still walk, do you still get into sandwiches in a big way?" - Flight of the Conchords

Delvid

Some new ones in there that are great. 15 & 16 are the best.

TexanAvenger

This is one of the biggest reasons I love kids. Just when you think they're cute and cuddly and dumb as a bag of rocks, they pull things like these out on you.

On a somewhat related note, I remember reading somewhere about a guy who's little brother had taken a test in his 1st or 2nd grade class on opposites. On the left column were the objects and you were to write your answers on the right. The list ran something like this, with the kid's answers written in:
Short - Tall
Wide - Thin
Fast - Slow
Hard- Soft
and last
Pro - Noob

The older brother was quite proud.

Pip

Huzzah for the young'uns learning about gender equality, and #8 is just brilliant.

Ilow

funny, but no 1st grader writes #16

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"Religion is the one area of our discourse in which it is considered noble to pretend to be certain about things no human being could possibly be certain about"
--Sam Harris

TexanAvenger

They might if said 1st grader has an older brother or sister....

Zephyr66

doubt it, i also doubt a 1st grader would know who stevie wonder is

small one

No.16 definately the best

Blackthorn

No 16 ... very funny!

Here's another one:

Women should be obscene and not heard.

/ducks and runs for cover

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