The Amazing Wisdom of Marion Barry - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

SirLance · 10-31-2005, 03:58 PM

Marion Barry was the mayor of Washington D.C. from 1979 to 1991. His term ended abruptly when the FBI, acting on a tip, got video of Barry using crack cocaine.

Which of course led to one of his most famous quotes: of the FBI informant who set up the sting operation, he complained: "Goddamn bitch set me up!"

He was charged with 3 felonies and 11 misdemeanors, but managed to get all but one charge dismissed; he was sentenced to six months in prison.

Once he was released from prison, he proved the adage that voters "get the politicians they deserve" -- he was elected to the Washington City Council and, two years later, again elected as mayor of the District.

With that background, it is my pleasure to present quotes by the duly elected mayor himself.

"If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very very low crime rate."

"I am clearly more popular than Reagan. I am in my third term. Where's Reagan? Gone after two! Defeated by George Bush and Michael Dukakis no less."

"The contagious people of Washington have stood firm against diversity during this long period of increment weather."

"I promise you a police car on every sidewalk."

"First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic club. And second, what can I say? I'm a night owl."

"The laws in this city are clearly racist. All laws are racist. The law of gravity is racist."

"I am making this trip to Africa because Washington is an international city, just like Tokyo, Nigeria or Israel. As mayor, I am an international symbol. Can you deny that to Africa?"

"People have criticized me because my security detail is larger than the president's. But you must ask yourself: are there more people who want to kill me than who want to kill the president? I can assure you there are."

"The brave men who died in Vietnam, more than 100% of which were black, were the ultimate sacrifice."

"People blame me because these water mains break, but I ask you, if the water mains didn't break, would it be my responsibility to fix them then? Would it!?!"

"I read a funny story about how the Republicans freed the slaves. The Republicans are the ones who created slavery by law in the 1600's. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves and he was not a Republican."

"What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary?"

"I am a great mayor; I am an upstanding Christian man; I am an intelligent man; I am a deeply educated man; I am a humble man."

Vizzini · 10-31-2005, 06:24 PM

lol, is this actually for real?

cj2112 · 10-31-2005, 07:02 PM

I blame Bush.

pandafaye · 10-31-2005, 07:23 PM

I can't believe anyone would say such things. Definitely a great read. Thanks for making me laugh!

SirLance · 10-31-2005, 09:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vizzini

lol, is this actually for real?

Well, it came from a usually reliable friend...

Don't know for sure, but probably...

feelgood · 10-31-2005, 10:40 PM

It's gotta be fuckin' real!

Man...I gotta lay off the weed...

Rangsk · 11-01-2005, 02:29 AM

Mostly untrue.

http://www.snopes.com/quotes/barry.htm

But then again, things don't need to be true to be funny

Zeraph · 11-01-2005, 02:30 PM

Lol, Reminds me of the chapelle show.

10-31-2005, 03:58 PM	#1 (permalink)
SirLance Junkie Location: In the middle of the desert.	The Amazing Wisdom of Marion Barry Marion Barry was the mayor of Washington D.C. from 1979 to 1991. His term ended abruptly when the FBI, acting on a tip, got video of Barry using crack cocaine. Which of course led to one of his most famous quotes: of the FBI informant who set up the sting operation, he complained: "Goddamn bitch set me up!" He was charged with 3 felonies and 11 misdemeanors, but managed to get all but one charge dismissed; he was sentenced to six months in prison. Once he was released from prison, he proved the adage that voters "get the politicians they deserve" -- he was elected to the Washington City Council and, two years later, again elected as mayor of the District. With that background, it is my pleasure to present quotes by the duly elected mayor himself. "If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very very low crime rate." "I am clearly more popular than Reagan. I am in my third term. Where's Reagan? Gone after two! Defeated by George Bush and Michael Dukakis no less." "The contagious people of Washington have stood firm against diversity during this long period of increment weather." "I promise you a police car on every sidewalk." "First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic club. And second, what can I say? I'm a night owl." "The laws in this city are clearly racist. All laws are racist. The law of gravity is racist." "I am making this trip to Africa because Washington is an international city, just like Tokyo, Nigeria or Israel. As mayor, I am an international symbol. Can you deny that to Africa?" "People have criticized me because my security detail is larger than the president's. But you must ask yourself: are there more people who want to kill me than who want to kill the president? I can assure you there are." "The brave men who died in Vietnam, more than 100% of which were black, were the ultimate sacrifice." "People blame me because these water mains break, but I ask you, if the water mains didn't break, would it be my responsibility to fix them then? Would it!?!" "I read a funny story about how the Republicans freed the slaves. The Republicans are the ones who created slavery by law in the 1600's. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves and he was not a Republican." "What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary?" "I am a great mayor; I am an upstanding Christian man; I am an intelligent man; I am a deeply educated man; I am a humble man." __________________ DEMOCRACY is where your vote counts, FEUDALISM is where your count votes.

10-31-2005, 06:24 PM	#2 (permalink)
Vizzini Addict Location: Vancouver, BC	lol, is this actually for real? __________________ Inconceivable!

10-31-2005, 10:40 PM	#6 (permalink)
feelgood Free Mars! Location: I dunno, there's white people around me saying "eh" all the time	It's gotta be fuckin' real! Man...I gotta lay off the weed... __________________ Looking out the window, that's an act of war. Staring at my shoes, that's an act of war. Committing an act of war? Oh you better believe that's an act of war

11-01-2005, 02:29 AM	#7 (permalink)
Rangsk Crazy Location: San Diego, CA	Mostly untrue. http://www.snopes.com/quotes/barry.htm But then again, things don't need to be true to be funny __________________ "Don't believe everything you read on the internet. Except this. Well, including this, I suppose." -- Douglas Adams

10-31-2005, 07:02 PM	#3 (permalink)
cj2112 Unbelievable Location: Grants Pass OR	I blame Bush.

10-31-2005, 07:23 PM	#4 (permalink)
pandafaye Tilted Location: Maine	I can't believe anyone would say such things. Definitely a great read. Thanks for making me laugh!

11-01-2005, 02:30 PM	#8 (permalink)
Zeraph Banned Location: The Cosmos	Lol, Reminds me of the chapelle show.