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Old 02-24-2009, 12:50 AM   #1 (permalink)
Depression Warriors

Just wondering if there is anybody else out there who is fighting depression or is living with someone who is.

I'm currently fighting depression... when I say fighting I really mean fighting in the sense that it's an emotional battlefield with depression. Suicide is thought about everyday and though I don't consider myself a cutter anymore, I still cut at least twice a year for random stressors.

I take medication for my depression: Effexor XR and Abilify (though I swear Abilify is some type of placebo because it does little to nothing when it really needs to matters).

I used to slit my wrists everyday when I was in high school, but not anymore.

I still think about committing suicide everyday. My psychiatrist is aware of this but assures me that medication and therapy will help that go away along with time.

Who else out there is suffering? What're your experiences/advice?
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Old 02-24-2009, 05:13 AM   #2 (permalink)
Living in a Warmer Insanity
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Location: Yucatan, Mexico
Yes, I lived with a depressed person for years Effexor, Wellbutrin, Zoloft etc... I honestly think the Effexor works best for her. That exercise and sun light. Without all those things working at once she would spend days in a darken room sleeping 12-16 hrs at a time. She also would claim there's nothing wrong, just tried. At least your confronting it head on it sounds. Denial only makes it worse.

Do you have people in your life you can talk openly with about this problem?
I used to drink to drown my sorrows, but the damned things have learned how to swim- Frida Kahlo

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Old 02-24-2009, 08:46 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Oregon
I was able to resolve my depression with better eating habits, more outside time, and exercise. Exercise makes an enormous difference. My doctor recommended I supplement my medication with exercise a couple of years ago, and I was able to wean myself off of meds a year later (under his supervision, of course). I had been on meds for 8 years at that point. I like to switch it up between intense activity (such as sprinting on my bicycle) and restorative, relaxing activity (yoga). Yoga has helped sooo much. I can't even begin to capture the difference it has made in my life via mere words. I'm serious. It has really developed my mind-body connection, and that is incredibly valuable in dealing with depression.

Managing depression is about developing good personal habits--routines, making sure you do one pleasurable activity a day, making sure you're getting all the shit you need to get done done. For me, the latter used to be a very difficult thing. Because I have changed my habits, this is no longer the case.

Try exercising and eating better--all those endorphins will help tremendously.
If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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Old 02-24-2009, 08:51 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: The Cosmos
Yes to both. If I find something that works, I'll let you know. It really sucks.
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Old 02-24-2009, 01:35 PM   #5 (permalink)
I've tried exercise, but it doesn't seem to work too much for me. I get a little more joyful, but not enough to stop the random feelings of depersonalization.

I've been trying homeopathic and all-natural drugs lately along with my Rx drugs and I haven't noticed much of a difference in my behavior except maybe I'm eating in a healthier manner, better appetite and such, and better complexion.

Perhaps it could be something to do with my hormones? I'm still pretty young (19) so maybe my hormones are still acting up. My older sister didn't get out of her teenage angst until she was 23, so maybe time is just the cure.
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Old 02-24-2009, 10:11 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I've been dealing with depression for most of the past 18 years. Initially I thought it was just normal teen angst, but when I got to college and felt the same way while everyone else was having a great time, I went and got help. I was on Paxil for about a year, which didn't do much. Withdrawl was a bitch, but at least I did my own research and knew about that beforehand. I haven't been getting professional help since I graduated several years ago.

I think the most useful thing for me was the therapy, which was much more effective at giving me motivation and reducing my symptoms than drugs. After a couple of years it even gave me an episode of a few hours where I wasn't feeling unhappy.

I've tried the diet and exercise thing (I'm currently trying to stick to it) and it's about as effective as the Paxil was.
And you believe Bush and the liberals and divorced parents and gays and blacks and the Christian right and fossil fuels and Xbox are all to blame, meanwhile you yourselves create an ad where your kid hits you in the head with a baseball and you don't understand the message that the problem is you.
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Old 02-24-2009, 10:13 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I was a real waste of flesh until I crawled out of my teen years. I think a lot of kids are depressed because they have so much lumped onto them... school, work, social pressures, etc. Hard to shift from being a kid to being an adult in the course of a year or two, as it seems most high school victims experience. You're out with your friends one minute and then having to decide the rest of your life the next.

Once you've busted out of the start-up phase and hit your stride... you may find yourself in a better spot.
Whatever you can carry.

"You should not drink... and bake."
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Old 02-24-2009, 11:25 PM   #8 (permalink)
change is hard.
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Location: the green room.
I'm bi-polar. Suffered from general depression and anxiety in high school (or that's what they mislabeled it as). I'm generally numb and detached everyday. My girlfriend suffers from anxiety and depression.

I deal with it by breathing and continuing. It's there and I've learned that I can't wish it away. In fact, it helps my acting a lot; being this detached. It lets me step back in my life.
EX: Whats new?
ME: I officially love coffee more then you now.
EX: uh...
ME: So, not much.
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Old 02-24-2009, 11:59 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: Ottawa
I suffer from SAD (seasonal affective disorder) to varying degrees so I know what its like - never medicated though, always self-medicated with more time outside, exercise and honestly the odd tanning session. Vit-D pills don't cut it.
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Old 02-25-2009, 02:37 AM   #10 (permalink)
Leaning against the -Sun-
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Location: on the other side
I've always wondered whether I had some form of depression, SAD, or otherwise, because I tend to feel sad or unhappy even when everything is going quite well in my life.

I have quite a dominating mother and she has always made me get up and face the world, not really taking my quitting for a final answer. So I have learned to be strong and to push myself.

Some days I'd still rather stay in bed.

But with age, and a few hard life experiences, I have learned to appreciate life a lot more, I have gained a certain inner peace I did not have before, and am less anxious. I used to say I was a pessimist, but now I tend to think that I look at the positives first. I can't be cheerful and skipping all the time, but I have found that trying harder to feel happy makes the happiness come around eventually.

I also think that getting outside, getting some sun and nature and fresh air, exercise, and healthier eating (with the odd juicy steak thrown in!) make a huge difference to general mood, energy and motivation.

I have never self-harmed, so I think that's a bigger hurdle to get over. I wish you the best of luck dealing with it.
Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.

Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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Old 02-25-2009, 04:04 PM   #11 (permalink)
another passenger
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Location: Youngstown, Ohio
I too went through big depressive bouts last year (up to the audio hallucinogenic phase) Five days in the mental lock up in Reno, NV and being put on wellbutrin and abilify. I was told it was a chemical imbalance from years of drug abuse and it would rectify itself since I had stopped doing drugs months before. maybe, but there are still times I am heavily depressed and think maybe the voices were right (although I would never admit it to them) I moved away to another state and tried to start a new life. They tell you its a process and you just have to learn to deal with it one bout at a time. I have stopped taking the antidepressants and haven't had a severe bout as of yet. One can only go about it day by day. Good luck to you
Never try to teach a pig to whistle
it wastes your time,
and annoys the pig.....
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Old 02-25-2009, 04:10 PM   #12 (permalink)
immoral minority
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Location: Back in Ohio
Originally Posted by Crompsin View Post
Once you've busted out of the start-up phase and hit your stride... you may find yourself in a better spot.
This is what happened to me. Things will get better, because they can't get much worse. I was also worried about making the wrong choices and how taking a job in some small far away town would impact my life. Everything in my life had been controlled and planned for me, and then I was suddenly on my own having to make major decisions that would affect my life. All my friends had left and were doing ok with their lives. Plus I had no money, and the job market wasn't too good for someone with no experience a few years ago either.

Part of it was figuring out what I want to do with my life, and actually working on accomplishing some simple goals. Things like eating healthy foods three times a day, exercising three times a week, getting up by 10am, going to bed by midnight, and a long-term goal of traveling to far away places. Go to the library and read up on someplace you have always wanted to go to. And if you mess up one day, just work at it the next day.

The other part was changing the way I thought, and not assuming the worst. CBT with a therapist worked for me. There is also an on-line version you can try out.
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Old 03-11-2009, 10:40 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Location: Northern CA
i know how you feel because i was once battling depression for a whole year straight during my high school years. but here are some things which helped me get out of it. and i am pretty young too (just turned 20) so i hope i can reach out to you somehow.

- idk if this will work for you (it kinda worked for me a bit) but think about other people out there that have it worse and be thankful about what you have. be thankful that you have a roof over your head and have other things that you have,
- another thing i found helpful is to find an outlet. maybe learn something totally new? something that you think you might find interesting. like: learning a new instrument, learn more about how your car works, learn a new sport. and its even better if you are out of the house and/or with new people. basically it keeps your mind off things and you wont think about it as much as time goes by.
-try not to stay alone for long periods of time. its ok that you can have solitude even now and then but try not to do it too much. the more you are out of the house, the better chance you will forget that you are depressed.
- and as i said before, meet new people. join a group or something of the same interest. and since high school is over, youll be able to do what you want without have the pressure from cliques or w/e.

but really as you grow older, youll realize some things. life is tough and there are some challenges that you have to do by yourself. youll find it easier to get over depression as time goes on by overcoming these challenges.

and lastly, just dont resort to suicide. your gonna end up hurting your loved ones along with yourself.
hope that helps =]
looking young can be fun at times in some situations. but many older people do not take you so seriously.
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Old 03-12-2009, 07:27 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Location: Greater Boston area
Stay away from alcohol.
Booze and depression are a bad mix. It makes things worse.

The other suggestions already made are good ones.
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