Weight gain Expectations?? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

raeanna74 · 05-12-2004, 11:33 AM

Only reason I think this came to my attention is that I've run into or visited people that I haven't seen in a long time. Actually a couple years in some cases. I'm now 30 and have a 3 yr old daughter. Perhaps it's because baby weight can be hard to loose or because there is so much problem with weight gain in the U.S. Maybe it's because of all the diet crazes. The result though actually kindof disturbs me. Don't get me wrong I like how I look and am proud of it but when people seem to expect me to be bigger - well it's weird. For example: On at least 4 occaisions in the past week I've had people say something to the effect "Wow you have stayed so thin, you must diet all the time." or "Wow did you even gain any babyweight, you are so thin."

Now I gained 60lbs of baby weight. MOSTLY water retention. I lost about 50 lbs of that in 6 months and the remaining 10 in the next 3 months. I nursed my daughter solely for the first 6 months and that's on big reason for the rapid weight loss to begin with. Also I babysit toddlers on a daily basis and can have up to 4 toddlers/babies here in one afternoon. That keeps you running. I try not to snack on their leftover food as that's my biggest temptation but I don't skip on meals or regular foods. I try to go easy on the sweets but that's about the limit of my "Diet" plan.

I'm also NOT skinny - I am about 5'6" and weight about 140-145 depending on the day. Not skinny - just within my healthy weight range is all. I just take care of myself, try to get the necessary sleep, eat right most of the time, and stay active.

Why is it that I keep getting these comments? Do people actually expect you to gain weight when you hit your 30's? or have a kid? Many of my friends from college are now must less fit and a bit chubby is many cases. Most of them have multiple children as well. It's practically a status symbol to have as many children as possible at my old college. Creepy.

Is this part of the reason some people may gain weight? Because it's expected of them? Not conciously of course but maybe subconciously they think that if they put on a couple pounds it's no big deal and it just snowballs? I'm surprised and a little confused by these comments. Has anyone else here experienced things like this?

miko · 05-12-2004, 11:42 AM

I think (looking at those around me, and myself honestly) that it is very common for one to gain weight as one ages. Slowing metabolism, less activity, more eating out, are all just some of the things that contribute to weight gain as one increases in age. Only those that stay physically active and conscientous(sp?) about their weight seem to stay on top of it. And i think a lot of the comments are out of jealousy.

You should be flattered.

apeman · 05-13-2004, 01:21 AM

I agree, it's probably jealousy. Being fat used to be a status symbol, so there may be an element of that in the collective subconscious. They say your metabolism slows down as you get older, so it must require some adjustment in eating and exercise not to put on weight. I expect the fat thing kind of creeps up on you when you're worrying about other stuff. Mind you, these days a lot of people are fat to start with...

05-12-2004, 11:33 AM	#1 (permalink)
raeanna74 I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot! Location: Upper Michigan	Weight gain Expectations?? Only reason I think this came to my attention is that I've run into or visited people that I haven't seen in a long time. Actually a couple years in some cases. I'm now 30 and have a 3 yr old daughter. Perhaps it's because baby weight can be hard to loose or because there is so much problem with weight gain in the U.S. Maybe it's because of all the diet crazes. The result though actually kindof disturbs me. Don't get me wrong I like how I look and am proud of it but when people seem to expect me to be bigger - well it's weird. For example: On at least 4 occaisions in the past week I've had people say something to the effect "Wow you have stayed so thin, you must diet all the time." or "Wow did you even gain any babyweight, you are so thin." Now I gained 60lbs of baby weight. MOSTLY water retention. I lost about 50 lbs of that in 6 months and the remaining 10 in the next 3 months. I nursed my daughter solely for the first 6 months and that's on big reason for the rapid weight loss to begin with. Also I babysit toddlers on a daily basis and can have up to 4 toddlers/babies here in one afternoon. That keeps you running. I try not to snack on their leftover food as that's my biggest temptation but I don't skip on meals or regular foods. I try to go easy on the sweets but that's about the limit of my "Diet" plan. I'm also NOT skinny - I am about 5'6" and weight about 140-145 depending on the day. Not skinny - just within my healthy weight range is all. I just take care of myself, try to get the necessary sleep, eat right most of the time, and stay active. Why is it that I keep getting these comments? Do people actually expect you to gain weight when you hit your 30's? or have a kid? Many of my friends from college are now must less fit and a bit chubby is many cases. Most of them have multiple children as well. It's practically a status symbol to have as many children as possible at my old college. Creepy. Is this part of the reason some people may gain weight? Because it's expected of them? Not conciously of course but maybe subconciously they think that if they put on a couple pounds it's no big deal and it just snowballs? I'm surprised and a little confused by these comments. Has anyone else here experienced things like this? __________________ "Always learn the rules so that you can break them properly." Dalai Lama My Karma just ran over your Dogma.

05-13-2004, 01:21 AM	#3 (permalink)
apeman Wah Location: NZ	I agree, it's probably jealousy. Being fat used to be a status symbol, so there may be an element of that in the collective subconscious. They say your metabolism slows down as you get older, so it must require some adjustment in eating and exercise not to put on weight. I expect the fat thing kind of creeps up on you when you're worrying about other stuff. Mind you, these days a lot of people are fat to start with... __________________ pain is inevitable but misery is optional - stick a geranium in your hat and be happy

05-12-2004, 11:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
miko Insane	I think (looking at those around me, and myself honestly) that it is very common for one to gain weight as one ages. Slowing metabolism, less activity, more eating out, are all just some of the things that contribute to weight gain as one increases in age. Only those that stay physically active and conscientous(sp?) about their weight seem to stay on top of it. And i think a lot of the comments are out of jealousy. You should be flattered.