orangemonkeyee

This story was written for my creative writing class back in high school and I came across it today on the computer. I still think it's funny. Our teacher gave us the assignment to write a short story on a person who has a reaction to medication in an unusual way.

Big Bob’s Last Conundrum Undersea

After a two hour descent in their tiny submarine named “Woopteefriggindoo” Bart, Bill, and Bob finally thudded against the ocean floor. They were stuck down at the bottom of the ocean for a mere three-hour exploration. Everyone was doing well except Bob. He was the one who had earlier eaten a few pounds of oysters and lobster and washed it all down with a few beers for lunch. Shortly after his feast he took down a cocktail of goodies to combat the indigestion and gas a few shots of Peptol Bismol, and a few anti-gas tablets. And to obliterate his bone splitting migraine, he gobbled down half a dozen extra strength aspirin tablets. “Yo Bob… you uh, okay man? You look a little off today man.” Bill asked.
“Yeah, I’m uh, yah know, a bit full from lunch still” Bob replied as he precariously leaned left in his captains chair to noisily relieve some pressure from his system.
“Dude, Bob. Not down here. You can’t pollute our enclosed air system, seriously, don’t do it again, please, and holy crap you smell. Raunchy.” Yelled Bill. A mind-blowing odor that burned the nasal cavity pervaded every last corner of the small sub was emitted from the bowels of Bob. A low gurgling sound followed by a rumble came bellowing from Bob’s stomach. “Is that normal for you Bob?” questioned Bart
Bob nodded, and groaned as he suddenly began gasping for air. Bill opened a small drawer and handed Bob his inhaler. Bob took a couple hits and returned to breathing normal. A few quiet minutes went by as the team entered data in their computers. “Hey Bob, your face is uh, orange.” Bob didn’t realize that his inhalers medication was about to make some serious implications. “ Guys, Code three… something is wrong with me” Bob sputtered as he began wildly farting and belching uncontrollably. “Bob what…too much beer?” Bill asked with a confused tweak to his eyebrows.
By now Bob’s skin had turned a bright orange, his tongue was a deep green color and his eyes were bleeding a strange yellow foamy substance. “ Guys, are we ascending yet?” Bob screamed as he waved his now gigantically bloated hands. “ Haha, Bob has those doctors office glove inflated hands, hahaha,” laughed Bill jokingly. Soon Bob’s shirt buttons popped off one by one as he inflated into a giant circuitous balloon. And moments later, Bob ripped one last amazing earth shaking, glass breaking, ground shattering fart. He then continued to explode into a dense white gassy cloud, never to be seen again.

Let me know what you think of this, entertainment.

msh58

i'm on meds. i took cold medicine on top of them and headed somewhere strange recently. I liked your story, could see just taking all these meds for every different problem that comes by and finally something just gives out, hopefully in as amusing a way as this. fade out in a white cloud, just gone.

Nice.