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Old 07-12-2008, 06:55 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
Worst Lyrics in History

I searched on "Worst Lyrics" and didn't get anything like this.

Pop music is and has always been characterized by a certain level of insipidity, and Rock has it's share too, but some songs really set the bar low.

So what are some of the worst lyrics ever?

Some of my choices:

"...But if this ever changing world in which we live in..." (Sir Paul - Live & Let Die)
"Pink as the sheets that we lay on./Pink is my favorite crayon." (Aerosmith - Pink)
"Here is my heart/ waiting for you./ Here is my soul./ I eat at chez noux." (Yes - Love Will Find a Way)
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:10 AM   #2 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
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Location: Florida
I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Watch you weave
Then breathe your story lines
And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Keep track of the visions in my eyes

While she's deceiving me
It cuts my security
Has she got control of me
I turn to her and say

Don't switch the blade
On the guy in shades, oh-no
Don't masquerade
With the guy in shades, oh-no
I can't believe it
'Cause you got it made
With the guy in shades, oh-no

And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
Forget my name while you collect your claim
And I wear my sunglasses at night
So I can, so I can
See the light that's right before my eyes

While she's deceiving me
She cuts my security
Has she got control of me
I turn to her and say

Don't switch the blade
On the guy in shades, oh-no
Don't masquerade
With the guy in shades, oh-no
I can't believe it
Don't be afraid
Of the guy in shades, oh-no
It kinda scared you
'Cause you got it made
With the guy in shades, oh-no

Oh, I say I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night
I say it to you now
I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night
I cry to you
I wear my sunglasses at night
I wear my sunglasses at night
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:22 AM   #3 (permalink)
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mixedmedia, it's bad enough we Canadians have to apologize for Bryan Adams.... now Corey Hart?

*sighs*

clue number one was when you knocked on my door
clue number two was the look that you wore
n' that's when i knew it was a pretty good sign
that something was wrong up on cloud number nine

well it's a long way up and we won't come down tonight
well it may be wrong but baby it sure feels right

and the moon is out and the stars are bright
and whatever comes s'gonna be alright
cause tonight you will be mine - up on cloud number nine
and there ain't no place that i'd rather be
and we can't go back but you're here with me
yeah, the weather is really fine - up on cloud number nine

now he hurt you and you hurt me
and that wasn't the way it was supposed to be
so baby tonight let's leave the world behind
and spend some time up on cloud number nine

well it's a long way up and we won't come down tonight
well it may be wrong but baby it sure feels right

well we won't come down tonight
ya we won't come down tonight
no we won't come down tonight

we can watch the world go by - up on cloud number nine
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:36 AM   #4 (permalink)
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skogafoss hates this

Savage Garden - Truly Madly Deeply

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

always she has to correct the grammar error, each and every time we hear it...
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:40 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
skogafoss hates this

Savage Garden - Truly Madly Deeply

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me...

always she has to correct the grammar error, each and every time we hear it...

What grammar error?
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:46 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Heh... let sleeping dies lie.... not lay.

You lay something; you don't lay down.
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Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot

Last edited by Baraka_Guru; 07-12-2008 at 07:49 AM..
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:51 AM   #7 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
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Location: Florida
Don't sweat it, Baraka, Canada's hardly got a monopoly on insipid lyrics:

I'm bringing sexy back (yeah)
Them other boys don't know how to act (yeah)
I think you're special what's behind your back (yeah)
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack. (yeah)

Take em' to the bridge

Dirty babe (uh huh)
You see these shackles baby I'm your slave (uh huh)
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave (uh huh)
It's just that no one makes me feel this way (uh huh)

Take 'em to the chorus

Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're twerkin' with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it

Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
[X6]

Get your sexy on

I'm bringing sexy back (yeah)
Them other fuckers don't know how to act (yeah)
Come let me make up for the things you lack (yeah)
'Cause your burning up I gotta get it fast (yeah)

Take 'em to the bridge

Dirty babe (uh huh)
You see these shackles baby I'm your slave (uh huh)
I'll let you whip me if I misbehave (uh huh)
It's just that no one makes me feel this way (uh huh)

Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're twerkin' with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it

Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
[X6]

Get your sexy on

You ready? [x3]

I'm bringing sexy back (yeah)
The mothers fuckers watch how I attack (yeah)
If that's your girl better watch your back (yeah)
Cause she'll burn it up for me and that's a fact (yeah)

Take em' to the chorus

Come here girl
Go ahead, be gone with it
Come to the back
Go ahead, be gone with it
VIP
Go ahead, be gone with it
Drinks on me
Go ahead, be gone with it
Let me see what you're twerkin' with
Go ahead, be gone with it
Look at those hips
Go ahead, be gone with it
You make me smile
Go ahead, be gone with it
Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it

Get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it
[X6]

Get your sexy on

You ready? [x4]

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PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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Old 07-12-2008, 07:59 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Location: Manhattan, NY
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru
Heh... let sleeping dies lie.... not lay.

You lay something; you don't lay down.
I was waiting for you to answer that one... most people have no clue that it's grammatically incorrect and it grates her each and every time we hear the song. She can't hear the endearment of the song at all, just the grammatical error.
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Old 07-12-2008, 08:02 AM   #9 (permalink)
Submit to me, you know you want to
 
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Location: Lilburn, Ga
worst song ever

You can tell the world you never was my girl
You can burn my clothes when I'm gone
Or you can tell your friends just what a fool I've been
And laugh and joke about me on the phone

You can tell my arms to go back onto the phone
You can tell my feet to hit the floor
Or you can tell my lilps to tell my fingertips
They won't be reaching out for you no more

But don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
I just don't think it'd understand
And if you tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
He might blow up and kill this man
Ooo

You can tell your ma I moved to Arkansas
Or you can tell your dog to bite my leg
Or tell your brother Cliff who's fist can tell my lips
He never really liked me anyway

Oh tell your Aunt Louise, tell anything you please
Myself already knows that I'm okay
Oh you can tell my eyes to watch out for my mind
It might be walking out on me today

But don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
I just don't think it'd understand
And if you tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
He might blow up and kill this man
Ooo

But don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
I just don't think it'd understand
And if you tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
He might blow up and kill this man
Ooo

Don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
He might blow up and kill this man
Ooo

Don't tell my heart, my achy breaky heart
He might blow up and kill this man
Ooo
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Old 07-12-2008, 08:52 AM   #10 (permalink)
 
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Location: ❤
"now I lay me down to sleep."
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Old 07-12-2008, 09:05 AM   #11 (permalink)
More Than You Expect
 
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Location: Queens
It's almost embarrassing how every freestyle song ever created is fit for this thread.

Corina - Temptation

We've been together so long
I never meant to do you wrong
But I've found someone new
Theirs nothing you can say or do
To try and change my mind
Would be a waste of time
Lets go our seperate ways
Theirs nothing more to say
Just try to ease your mind
'Cause I don't mean to hurt you
It's just he's knows to treat me like a special lady
It's time you look away
He's knows just how to touch me
Maybe someday you'll understand

Chorus:
Temptation is a part of life
It doesn't matter if its wrong or right
Temptation is a part of life
It doesn't matter if its wrong or right
It makes you do what you love

He's knows I can't resist
Ooh, his perfect lips
When he looks in my eyes
I feel like I've been hypnotized
I've wanted him for so long
What I felt was oh so strong

...


http://youtube.com/watch?v=xXeLNXnJ17M
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Old 07-12-2008, 09:35 AM   #12 (permalink)
follower of the child's crusade?
 
The worst

Cheeky girls .

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

never ever ask
where do you go

never ever ask
what do you do

never ever ask
whats in your mind

never ever ask
if you'l be mine

don't ask why
don't be shy
touch my bum
this is life

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boys
you are the cheeky boys

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy's

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy's

mmm cheeky cheeky

che che che che che

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

(oo) boy's cheeky girls
(oo) girl's cheeky boys

never ever ask
where do you go

never ever ask
what do you do

never ever ask
whats in your mind

never ever ask
if you'l be mine

don't ask why
don't be shy
touch my bum
this is life

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boys
you are the cheeky boys

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy's

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy'

come and join the cheeky club
this is what you want
come and sing the cheeky song
our cheeky cheeky song ( oo )

come and join the cheeky club
this is what you want
come and sing the cheeky song
our cheeky cheeky song ( oo )


don't ask why
don't be shy
touch my bum
this is life

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boys
you are the cheeky boys

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy's

we are the cheeky girls
we are the cheeky girls

you are the cheeky boy's
you are the cheeky boy's

cheeky cheeky
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Old 07-12-2008, 01:25 PM   #13 (permalink)
Crazy
 
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"Only time will tell if we stand the test of time"

Sammy Hagar while part of Van Halen, the name of the song escapes me but that insipid line lives with me forever
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Old 07-12-2008, 01:42 PM   #14 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
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Location: Florida
Quote:
Originally Posted by Strange Famous
cheeky cheeky
Yes. I think these might just be the worst lyrics in history.
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PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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Old 07-12-2008, 01:44 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Location: Yonder
The single worst pop lyric of all time comes from the backing vocals of Michael Jackson's "Bad"

They go:

Bad, Bad.
Really, really bad.
Bad, bad.
Really, really bad.
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Old 07-12-2008, 02:31 PM   #16 (permalink)
Friend
 
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Location: New Mexico
Finger Eleven - Paralyzer (i hate them so much and the lyrics to this song are just terrible)

hold on so nervously
To me and my drink
I wish it was cooling me
But so far, has not been good
It’s been shitty
And I feel awkward, as I should
This club has got to be
The most pretentious thing
Since I thought you and me
Well I am imagining
A dark lit place
Or your place or my place

Well I’m not paralyzed
But, I seem to be struck by you
I want to make you move
Because you’re standing still
If your body matches
What your eyes can do
You’ll probably move right through
Me on my way to you

I hold out for one more drink
Before I think
I’m looking too desperately
But so far has not been fun
I should just stay home
If one thing really means one
This club will hopefully
Be closed in three weeks
That would be cool with me
Well I’m still imagining
A dark lit place
Or your place or my place

I’m not paralyzed
But, I seem to be struck by you
I want to make you move
Because you’re standing still
If your body matches
What your eyes can do
You’ll probably move right through
Me on my way to you

We’ll I’m not paralyzed
But, I seem to be struck by you
I want to make you move
Because you’re standing still
If your body matches
What your eyes can do
You’ll probably move right through
Me on my way to you
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Old 07-12-2008, 02:37 PM   #17 (permalink)
 
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for some reason, i have remember this particularly miserable lyrical excursion inflicted on us by emerson lake and palmer since high school.

it contains the worst couplet ever penned, which is in bold:

Still....You Turn Me On

Do you want to be an angel,
Do you want to be a star,
Do you want to play some magic on my guitar?
Do you want to be a poet,
Do you want to be my string?
You could be anything.
Do you want to be the lover of another
Undercover? You could even be the man on the moon.

Do you want to be the player,
Do you want to be the string?
Let me just tell you something,
It just don't mean a thing.
You see it really doesn't matter
when you're buried in disguise
by the dark glass on your eyes,
though your flesh has crystalised;
Still .... you turn me on.

Do you want to be the pillow where I lay my head,
Do you want to be the feathers lying in my bed?
Do you want to be a colour cover magazine;
create a scene.
Every day a little sadder,
A little madder,
Someone get me a ladder.


Do you want to be the singer,
Do you want to be the song?
Let me tell you something
you just couldn't be more wrong.
You see I really have to tell you
that it all gets so intense.
>From my experience
It just doesn't seem to make sense,
Still .... you turn me on
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Old 07-12-2008, 02:46 PM   #18 (permalink)
zomgomgomgomgomgomg
 
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Location: Fauxenix, Azerona
Are we talking worst like lamest or grossest?

Mindless Self Indulgence: Panty Shot

Five year old pantyshot
oh,I can see between her legs
Five year old pantyshot
Oh Yeah Yeah Yeah
Five year old mother fuckin

pantyshot
Can't complain
I didn't even touch her so I can't be blamed
5 year old pantyshot in my brain
My life has meaning when she spreads her legs

5 year old pantyshot
oh,I can see between her legs
5 year old pantyshot oh
cock, bomb shock,you muthafuckas missed a spot
mother fuckin

pantyshot
I can't complain
I didn't even touch her so I can't be blamed
Five year old pantyshot hit my brain
My life has meaning when she spreads her legs

Five year old panty shot
shot
shot
shot
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twisted no more
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Old 07-12-2008, 04:11 PM   #19 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
"I've been watching you for hours/ it's been years since we were born..."
Counting Crows - Murder of One

Quote:
Originally Posted by Byrnison
"Only time will tell if we stand the test of time"

Sammy Hagar while part of Van Halen, the name of the song escapes me but that insipid line lives with me forever
Why can't this be love.
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Old 07-12-2008, 04:20 PM   #20 (permalink)
comfortably numb...
 
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Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's busy"
"Too busy to come to the phone"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's tryin'"
"To start a new life of her own"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's happy"
"So why don't you leave her alone?"

CHORUS
And the operator says "40 cents more for the next 3 minutes"
Ple-ease Mrs. Avery, I just gotta talk to her
I'll only keep her a while
Please Mrs. Avery, I just wanna tell 'er goodbye

Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's packin'"
"She's gonna be leavin' today"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's marryin' "
"A fella down Galveston way"
Sylvia's mother says "Please don't say nothin'"
"To make her start cryin' and stay"

CHORUS

Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's hurryin' "
"She's catchin' the nine o'clock train"
Sylvia's mother says "Take your umbrella"
"cause Sylvie, it's startin' to rain"
And Sylvia's mother says "thank you for callin'"
"And, sir, won't you call back again?"
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Old 07-12-2008, 04:33 PM   #21 (permalink)
Laid back
 
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Location: Jayhawkland
Ladies and gentleman, I present to you

Natalie Portman's Shaved Head - Beard Lust

Look at my facial hair
Oh man hot damn it's everywhere
Where'd you get that beard?

I grew it
How you keep it so clean?
I shampoo it
YEAH
I really wish I could grow a mustache
Why don't ya?
Well frankly I don't have the cash
You gotta take care of your facial hair
Otherwise it gets scruffy and bare

The elements of style
For the beard (something)
The essential manual
For owners of beards

Trim it
Cut it
Comb it
Style it
Clean it and scent with violet
Love it but don't get violent
Rub it but not in public
Eat with it but don't get messy
The only rule is keep it classy

........

If you want to hear this bit of awesomeness, go to their myspace. I downloaded it for someone at work, but just had to listen to it beforehand. Super-duper is all I can say about it.
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Old 07-12-2008, 04:52 PM   #22 (permalink)
Functionally Appropriate
 
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Location: Toronto
Weezer's El Scorcho is a fun, catchy pop tune but the lyrics are pretty clunky:

I went to the Green Day concert.
You said you never heard of them (How cool is that?)
so I went in to your room, and read your dia-ree-hee...


The Five Man Electrical Band's song Signs is just about a perfect song: It's catchy and the upbeat tone matches its earnest message well. It's also structured quite neatly in its rhyming and phrasing. Because of this, the one line that fails to rhyme and fit the phrasing sticks out like a sore thumb:

And the sign said anybody caught trespassing would be shot on sight
So I jumped on the fence and yelled at the house, Hey! what gives you the right
To put up a fence to keep me out or to keep mother nature in
If God was here, he'd tell you to your face, man you're some kinda sinner


You just know they agonized over a way use "sin" instead of "sinner" but couldn't quite get it. I shake my head every time I hear it.
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Old 07-12-2008, 05:52 PM   #23 (permalink)
Submit to me, you know you want to
 
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Location: Lilburn, Ga
Quote:
Originally Posted by uncle phil
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's busy"
"Too busy to come to the phone"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's tryin'"
"To start a new life of her own"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's happy"
"So why don't you leave her alone?"

CHORUS
And the operator says "40 cents more for the next 3 minutes"
Ple-ease Mrs. Avery, I just gotta talk to her
I'll only keep her a while
Please Mrs. Avery, I just wanna tell 'er goodbye

Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's packin'"
"She's gonna be leavin' today"
Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's marryin' "
"A fella down Galveston way"
Sylvia's mother says "Please don't say nothin'"
"To make her start cryin' and stay"

CHORUS

Sylvia's mother says "Sylvia's hurryin' "
"She's catchin' the nine o'clock train"
Sylvia's mother says "Take your umbrella"
"cause Sylvie, it's startin' to rain"
And Sylvia's mother says "thank you for callin'"
"And, sir, won't you call back again?"
oh man how can you knock Dr. Hook!!!
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Old 07-12-2008, 06:26 PM   #24 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Anything by the artificial rap industry would count in my book.
Quote:
Now... what yall wanna do?
Wanna be ballers? shot-callers?
Brawlers -- who be dippin in the benz wit the spoilers
On the low from the jake in the taurus
Tryin to get my hands on some grants like horace
Yeah livin the raw deal, three course meals
Spaghetti, fettucini, and veal
But still, everythings real in the field
And what you cant have now, leave in your will
But dont knock me for tryin to bury
Seven zeros, over in rio dijanery
Aint nobodys hero, but I wanna be heard
On your hot 9-7 everyday, thats my word
Swimmin in women wit they own condominiums
Five plus fives, who drive millineums
Its all about the benjamins, what?
I get a fifty pound bag of ooh for the mutts
Five carats on my hands wit the cuts
And swim in european figures
Fuck bein a broke nigga
http://www.lyricsfreak.com/p/puff+da..._20112073.html
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Old 07-12-2008, 06:28 PM   #25 (permalink)
Leaning against the -Sun-
 
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Location: on the other side
I actually like these guys, but this song when I first heard it, really put me off:

Summer stretching on the grass
Summer dresses pass
In the shade of the willow tree
Creeps a crawling over me
Over me and over you
Stuck together with god's glue
It's gonna' get stickier, too
It's been a long, hot summer
Lets get undercover
Don't try to hard to think, don't think at all

I'm not the only one,
Staring at the sun.
Afraid of what you'd find
If you took a look inside
I'm not just deaf and dumb
Staring at the sun
Not the only one
Who's happy to go blind

There's an insect in your ear
If you scratch it won't disappear
It's gonna itch and burn and sting
You want to see what the scratching brings
Waves that leave me out of reach
Breaking on your back like a beach
Will we ever live in peace?

'Cause those that can't do
Often have to
And those that can't do
Often have to preach

To the ones
Staring at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find
If you took a look inside
Not just deaf and dumb
I'm staring at the sun
I'm not the only one
Who'd rather go blind

Intransigence is all around
Military still in town
Armour plated suits and ties
Daddy just won't say goodbye
Referee won't blow the whistle
God is good but will He listen
I'm nearly great
But there's something missing

I left it in the duty free area
But you never really belonged to me

You're not the only one
Staring at the sun
Afraid of what you'd find
You step back inside
Not sucking on my thumb
I'm staring at the sun
I'm not the only one
Who's happy to go blind

.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.


Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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Old 07-13-2008, 02:42 AM   #26 (permalink)
Eponymous
 
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Location: Central Central Florida
This came to mind first:

Yo, Ill tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
Ill tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna zigazig ha.

If you want my future forget my past,
If you wanna get with me better make it fast,
Now dont go wasting my precious time,
Get your act together we could be just fine

Ill tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna zigazig ha.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but thats the way it is.

What do you think about that now you know how I feel,
Say you can handle my love are you for real,
I wont be hasty, Ill give you a try
If you really bug me then Ill say goodbye.

Yo Ill tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna zigazig ha.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but thats the way it is.

So heres a story from a to z, you wanna get with me
You gotta listen carefully,
We got em in the place who likes it in your face,
We got g like mc who likes it on an
Easy v doesnt come for free, shes a real lady,
And as for me youll see,
Slam your body down and wind it all around
Slam your body down and wind it all around.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,
Make it last forever friendship never ends,
If you wanna be my lover, you have got to give,
Taking is too easy, but thats the way it is.

If you wanna be my lover, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta,
You gotta, you gotta, slam, slam, slam, slam
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down and wind it all around.
Slam your body down zigazig ah
If you wanna be my lover.

-Spice Girls
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Old 07-13-2008, 03:36 AM   #27 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
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Location: Florida
that
...if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends...
always puzzled me
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PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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Old 07-13-2008, 04:15 AM   #28 (permalink)
Husband of Seamaiden
 
Lucifer's Avatar
 
Location: Nova Scotia
Even though I am a huge (closet) Duran Duran fan, the lyrics (and the accompanying vid) always struck me as a little too silly, even for Duran Duran:

"New Moon On Monday"

Shake up the picture the lizard mixture
With your dance on the eventide
You got me coming up with answers
All of which I deny
I said it again
Could I please rephrase it
Maybe I can catch a ride
I couldn't really put it much plainer
But I'll wait till you decide
Send me your warning siren
As if I could ever hide
Last time La Luna

[CHORUS]

I light my torch and wave it for the
New moon on Monday
And a firedance through the night
I stayed the cold day with a lonely satellite

Breaking away with the best of both worlds
A smile that you can't disguise
Every minute I keep finding
Clues that you leave behind
Save me from these reminders
As if I'd forget tonight
This time La Luna

[CHORUS]
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Old 07-13-2008, 06:12 AM   #29 (permalink)
Devoted
 
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Donor
Location: New England
The award for total inability to craft rhymes goes to Steve Miller for Take The Money & Run.


This heres a story about billy joe and bobbie sue
Two young lovers with nothin better to do
Than sit around the house, get high, and watch the tube
And here is what happened when they decided to cut loose

They headed down to, ooh, old el paso
Thats where they ran into a great big hassle
Billy joe shot a man while robbing his castle
Bobbie sue took the money and run

Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run

Billy mack is a detective down in texas
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is
He aint gonna let those two escape justice
He makes his livin off of the peoples taxes

Bobbie sue, whoa, whoa, she slipped away
Billy joe caught up to her the very next day
They got the money, hey
You know they got away
They headed down south and theyre still running today
Singin go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
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Old 07-13-2008, 08:54 AM   #30 (permalink)
sufferable
 
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Baby Im a want you
Baby Im a need you
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:11 AM   #31 (permalink)
We work alone
 
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Location: Cake Town
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedmedia
that
...if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends...
always puzzled me
If you want to be her lover, her friends need to accept you and vice-versa. I like that song.

Akon - I Wanna Fuck You


[Chorus (Akon):]
I see you winding and grinding up on that pole,
I know you see me lookin' at you and you already know
I wanna fuck you, you already know
I wanna fuck you, you already know

[Snoop Dogg:]
Money in the air as more feel grab you by your coat tail take you to the motel, hoe sale,
don't tell, won't tell, baby said I don't talk Dogg but she told on me, oh well,
take a picture with me, what the flick gonna do, baby stick to me & I'mma stick on you,
if you pick me then I'mma pick on you, d-o-double g and I'm here to put this dick on you,
I'm stuck on pussy and yours is right, wrip riding them poles and them doors is tight
and I'mma get me a shot for the end of the night 'cause pussy is pussy and baby you're pussy for life.

[Chorus (Akon)]

[Akon:]
Shorty I can see you ain't lonely handful of niggas and they all got cheese,
so you looking at me now what's it gonna be just another tease far as I can see,
trying get you up out this club if it means spendin' a couple dubs,
throwing bout 30 stacks in the back make it rain like that cause I'm far from a scrub,
you know my pedigree, ex-dealer use to move phetamines,
girl I spend money like it don't mean nothing and besides I got a thing for you.

[Chorus (Akon)]

[Snoop Dogg:]
Mobbin' through club in low pressing I'm sitting in the back in the smokers section (just smoking),
birds eye, I got a clear view, you cant see me but I can see you (baby I see you),
it's cool we jet the mood is set,
your pussy is wet you rubbing your back and touching your neck,
your body is movin' you humpin' and jumpin' your titties is bouncin' you smilin' and grinin' and looking at me.

[Akon:]
Girl and while you're looking at me I'm ready to hit the caddy right up on the patio move the patty to the caddy,
baby you got a phatty the type I like to marry wanting to just give you everything and that's kinda scary,
cause I'm loving the way you shake your ass, bouncin', got me tippin' my glass,
Normally don't get caught up too fast but I got a thing for you.

[Chorus (Akon) x2]
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:24 AM   #32 (permalink)
Living in a Warmer Insanity
 
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Super Moderator
Location: Yucatan, Mexico
Quote:
Originally Posted by mixedmedia
that
...if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends...
always puzzled me
Seems pretty straight forward to me.

As for worst lyrics? I vote for:

Well I run through the kitchen looked in the paper
Said, oh God almighty, mama, there it says a gator, come on, come on
Every other day I got a gator on my lawn
Well you dropped your groceries in the kitchen sink
Went to work and made the bathroom stink, come on, come on
Every other day I got a gator on my lawn

Get with it mike!

Well I jumped out of bed run across the street
Asked my neighbor said, wheres my meat?
I had a red raw steak cant find it anywhere
He looked at me and said, what the hell do I care? come on
Every other day I got a gator on my lawn

Yeah I run in the kitchen looked in the paper
Said, oh God almighty, mama, there it says a gator, come on, come on
Every other day I got a gator on my lawn
Well every other day I got a gator on my lawn
Every other day I got a gator on my lawn
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:42 AM   #33 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
mixedmedia's Avatar
 
Location: Florida
well, you see, I don't even have to know how Tully interprets it to know that we read it the same way
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PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:51 AM   #34 (permalink)
Living in a Warmer Insanity
 
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Super Moderator
Location: Yucatan, Mexico
Well, obviously we went to different schools together.
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:51 AM   #35 (permalink)
Minion of the scaléd ones
 
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Location: Northeast Jesusland
"... In the desert, you can remember your name/
'cause there ain't no one for to give you no shame."
- America - Horse with no name.

Not necessarily the worst lyric ever, but the biggest drop-off in quality in a song: last line of Springsteen's Thunder Road:
"It's a town full of losers. I'm pullin' outta here on a wiiiiiiing."

An exploration of the trancendentally sublime in the quotidian to that point, and then smack down back into the mundane. I've always wished he would write a different line for that.
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Old 07-13-2008, 09:52 AM   #36 (permalink)
has all her shots.
 
mixedmedia's Avatar
 
Location: Florida
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tully Mars
Well, obviously we went to different schools together.


*******************

America reminded me of Bread


Baby, im-a want you
Baby, im-a need you
You the only one I care enough to hurt about
Maybe im-a crazy
But I just cant live without...

Your lovin and affection
Givin me direction
Like a guiding light to help me through a darkest hour
Lately Im a-prayin
That youll always be a-stayin beside me

Used to be my life was just emotions passing by
Feeling all the while and never really knowing why...

Lately Im a-prayin
That youll always be a-stayin beside me.

Used to be my life was just emotions passing by
Then you came along and made me laugh
And made me cry...
You taught me why...

Baby, im-a want you
Baby, im-a need you

Oh, it took so long to find you, baby

Baby, im-a want you
Baby, im-a need you
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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce

Last edited by mixedmedia; 07-13-2008 at 09:56 AM.. Reason: Automerged Doublepost
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Old 07-13-2008, 10:12 AM   #37 (permalink)
 
MexicanOnABike's Avatar
 
Location: up north
"
...
Let me hear you say this shit is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
(This shit is bananas)
(B-A-N-A-N-A-S)
...
"

i want to kill myself whenever I head Gwen Stephani.

"Woohoo, Yeehoo"
repeat x10000000

ears are bleeding at this point.
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Old 07-13-2008, 04:34 PM   #38 (permalink)
Registered User
 
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Location: Texas
pearl jam - bugs

All these...

I got bugs
I got bugs in my room
Bugs in my bed
Bugs in my ears
Their eggs in my head
Bugs in my pockets
Bugs in my shoes
Bugs in the way I feel about you

Bugs on my window
Trying to get in
They dont go nowhere
Waiting, waiting...
Bugs on my ceiling
Crowded the floor
Standing, sitting, kneeling...
A few block the door

And now the questions:
Do I kill them?
Become their friend?
Do I eat them?
Raw or well done?
Do I trick them?
I dont think theyre that dumb
Do I join them?
Looks like thats the one

I got bugs on my skin
Tickle my nausea I let it happen again
Theyre always takin over
I see they surround me, I see...
See them deciding my fate
Oh, that which was once...was once up to me...
Now its too late

I got bugs in my room...one on one
Thats when I had a chance
Ill just stop now
Ill become naked and with the...
Ill become one
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Old 07-13-2008, 08:22 PM   #39 (permalink)
Addict
 
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Location: Cottage Grove, Wisconsin
Quote:
"Ride the snake, ride the snake
To the lake, the ancient lake, baby
The snake is long, seven miles
Ride the snake...he's old, and his skin is cold

The west is the best
The west is the best
Get here, and we'll do the rest

[...]

The killer awoke before dawn, he put his boots on"
Parts of The End are OK, but these bits always make me chortle. Jimbo couldn't do better than old & cold, snake/lake? If i'm going to give it to Mama, i'm not putting my boots on.

Speaking of bad lyrics, did people see the Germaine Greer article on Bob Dylan in the Guardian. I quote:

Quote:
It's not verse, not even doggerel. Nor is it prose, because it doesn't make sense. Its combination of pretentiousness and illiteracy isn't surprising, which would be something; it's just annoying.
I tend to agree with GG, but when she uses phrases like "Fustian of this ilk", you have to wonder about her aesthetic sensibilities.

See the whole article here.
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Old 07-13-2008, 08:25 PM   #40 (permalink)
Who You Crappin?
 
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Location: Everywhere and Nowhere
anything by KISS
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