Jesus = dead? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

KWSN · 10-30-2003, 09:59 PM

OK.... I heard something rather odd the other day and I thought almost immediately that this would be a perfect place for it. So here goes.

According to where I heard it from, Jesus actually ALREADY CAME for a second time, during a firefight in some war (I don't remember which) but was killed upon appearence by artillery. The source (a friend of mine) said that soldiers in that battle remember seeing a bright flash for a split second that disappeared, but nothing that a mine or shell would produce. Also he said that when Jesus returned to Heaven, he told God that it was time to give up on our race if this was what we had degenerated to. Since then, we've been in constant decline.

Odd, I know. My personal opinion: it's complete bullshit. Makes no sense whatsoever. I don't know, maybe someone else has heard about this? Maybe someone can give something valid to back this up? Just in my opinion it's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard.

Discuss.

Reese · 10-31-2003, 12:04 AM

Haha Total BS. He wouldn't have to come to earth to see what was going on. Therefore he wouldn't have got shot. He's the son of God, I think he'd have better sense than to drop down in a middle of a battlefield, He probably couldn't be killed by it anyway.

phredgreen · 10-31-2003, 12:59 AM

yeah... i'm gonna agree with cybermike here... the son of god, in all his infinite wisdom, would probably pick a better place to return than the (very near) future site of an artillery crater. i'm sure the messiah has some kind of foresight into this type of thing.

phukraut · 10-31-2003, 05:19 AM

how would your friend know about the conversation jesus had with god?

Artsemis · 10-31-2003, 05:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by phukraut
how would your friend know about the conversation jesus had with god?

You beat me to it.

Macheath · 10-31-2003, 08:53 AM

So what, now Jesus is gone for good and we're suddenly free from all of that cross-your-fingers-follow-the-rules-and-wait-stuff that people use to manipulate each other?

I don't think so.

glytch · 10-31-2003, 09:51 AM

I tend to really like theories like this, but this one kind of sounds like something some kid made up while on the john. I have a friend who is completely convinced that Jesus did came back, and we killed him. His theory, however, was that Jesus was really David Koresh (sp?) and he died in Waco. Kinda makes you think about all the money that's gone to waste on feeding people like this, huh?

Gun · 10-31-2003, 01:58 PM

Don't believe it all. Only witnesses were soldiers under fire in an environment where bright flashes and other such phenomena are frequent and expected? That's not too stable if you ask me.

GakFace · 10-31-2003, 04:01 PM

great points already made. Aside from that no one stated out, that the bible says Judgement day. The last day is Judgement day right? So why give up the the race when you get to condemn them all!

(yes I'm a christian, but hey if you created a race and they pissed you off, wouldn't you rather wanna have a judgement day and condemn them all rather then just forget about them?)

glytch · 10-31-2003, 07:02 PM

Well, maybe forgetting about us is the same as condemning us, if you look at it from a Christian point of view (which I don't pretend to understand).

nefarious · 10-31-2003, 09:24 PM

it sounds very unlikely that the all knowing omnipresent JC would make a mistake like that ..

where was the source of the information? quite a funny thing to hear. according to the church i had to attend while living with parents, jesus will be returning after this:

the U.S. goes into deep debt. the catholic church pays the debt. now everything becomes owned by the catholic church, which begins to prosecute all non-catholic christians. christians leave in the rapture. california sinks into the ocean. somehow war breaks out and russia bombs out U.S. leaving nothing but a smoldering nuclear heap. the lord appears in the sky. end of world and white throne judgment.

Hows that ? ^_^

Spinach_Indeed · 11-01-2003, 08:15 AM

...When everything becomes owned by the Catholic Church, I'll finally break down and lay naked on the Street and wait for Jesus. I hope he'll wear a Hat. A Top Hat

tecoyah · 11-09-2003, 07:36 PM

Many learned people consider jesus to be an avatar(one who recalls all past lives) and if this is the case, there have been many returns....the buddah included. actualy I guess that would make jesus a return of buddah. anyway...some say sai baba in india is a living avatar right now as he does many of the miracles attributed to jesus and such....would be amazing if true

glytch · 11-10-2003, 05:45 AM

The Avatar theory is very interesting. Is there anywhere I can go to read up on it?

nz_TonTo · 11-10-2003, 11:36 PM

Someone else has touched on this a few posts up, but im going to post anyway.

If Jesus did indeed say something along the lines of "give up on these humans", then we wouldn't be here right now. If God agreed and said "yeah, lets pull the plug on the whole operation" that would mean only one thing...The end of the world.

that is of course if Jesus/God exist(ed)

muckluck · 11-11-2003, 04:03 PM

I say the bright flash was a secret weapon and the highly religious enemy thought it was Jesus. Either that or Some drunk guy in a bar said it and someone there thought it was cool,and I think Jesus would be invulnerable to any attack.

anti fishstick · 11-11-2003, 04:14 PM

i dont think hearsay is a good source of evidence at all.

wannabenakid247 · 11-12-2003, 04:22 AM

I don't think theres much truth in that. It would be horrible if there was though and we were all doomed.

Jay Francis · 11-12-2003, 05:39 PM

So much of the New Testament is based on older works, I suspect that Yeshua (Jesus) never existed.

nefarious · 11-12-2003, 06:28 PM

if god gave up on us humans here one planet earth .. is there perchance an alternate universe in which things dont go wrong? ..

the bible dates back more than 2000 years .. wouldnt that be a monstrous waste if after that long it all goes to shit?

although "a day with god is a thousand years for man," and vice versa.

tecoyah · 11-14-2003, 08:58 AM

Understood that"the bible" goes back 2000 yrs. but many religious texts predate it by centuries. no mention of jesus in these...buddah and others though...perhaps it all goes back to the avatar theory, maybe they are all correct in ways and inaccurate in others...hmmmm, sounds like a book written by humans if you ask me. It would certainly make for a more pleasant world if fundimentalists of all sects, just opened the mind for a few minutes each day and accepted the differences inherent in humanity.

There is no GOD, that would be to easy.
But there is something.

taliendo · 11-23-2003, 11:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinach_Indeed
...When everything becomes owned by the Catholic Church, I'll finally break down and lay naked on the Street and wait for Jesus. I hope he'll wear a Hat. A Top Hat

sooooo funny. . .

If you've ever read Cayce, you'll see that Christ (a soul) did come as Jesus of Nazereth, but had entertained the flesh many times over ie. Adam, Joseph, Enoch, etc. I'm not sure if I believe the Christ has been incarnate since the man Jesus, but what do I know?

merkerguitars · 11-30-2003, 03:28 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cybermike
Haha Total BS. He wouldn't have to come to earth to see what was going on. Therefore he wouldn't have got shot. He's the son of God, I think he'd have better sense than to drop down in a middle of a battlefield, He probably couldn't be killed by it anyway.

it he hit the nail right on the head...

Spire · 12-05-2003, 09:59 PM

jesus woulda learned his lesson about what happens when he comes here acting better than us
story is bullshit made up for kicks

ChrisJericho · 12-06-2003, 02:08 AM

Sorry, that story is incorrect. Jesus the historical figure died thousands of years ago.

geodaro · 12-08-2003, 09:59 AM

ONe thing is for sure, if Jesus did come to Earth and check out the current state of "humanity", then he would high-tail it back to heaven and give up on all us infidels!

P.S. The world in general, not just human civilization, has been in a state of decline since the beginning....it's called the second law of thermodynamics (Entropy) and it is an unavoidible reality. Sorry.

10-30-2003, 09:59 PM	#1 (permalink)
KWSN green	Jesus = dead? OK.... I heard something rather odd the other day and I thought almost immediately that this would be a perfect place for it. So here goes. According to where I heard it from, Jesus actually ALREADY CAME for a second time, during a firefight in some war (I don't remember which) but was killed upon appearence by artillery. The source (a friend of mine) said that soldiers in that battle remember seeing a bright flash for a split second that disappeared, but nothing that a mine or shell would produce. Also he said that when Jesus returned to Heaven, he told God that it was time to give up on our race if this was what we had degenerated to. Since then, we've been in constant decline. Odd, I know. My personal opinion: it's complete bullshit. Makes no sense whatsoever. I don't know, maybe someone else has heard about this? Maybe someone can give something valid to back this up? Just in my opinion it's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard. Discuss. __________________ Your arms are broken!

10-31-2003, 12:04 AM	#2 (permalink)
Reese Delicious	Haha Total BS. He wouldn't have to come to earth to see what was going on. Therefore he wouldn't have got shot. He's the son of God, I think he'd have better sense than to drop down in a middle of a battlefield, He probably couldn't be killed by it anyway. __________________ “It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry

10-31-2003, 12:59 AM	#3 (permalink)
phredgreen who? Location: the phoenix metro	yeah... i'm gonna agree with cybermike here... the son of god, in all his infinite wisdom, would probably pick a better place to return than the (very near) future site of an artillery crater. i'm sure the messiah has some kind of foresight into this type of thing. __________________ My country is the world, and my religion is to do good. - Thomas Paine

10-31-2003, 09:51 AM	#7 (permalink)
glytch I am not permanent. Location: Tennessee	I tend to really like theories like this, but this one kind of sounds like something some kid made up while on the john. I have a friend who is completely convinced that Jesus did came back, and we killed him. His theory, however, was that Jesus was really David Koresh (sp?) and he died in Waco. Kinda makes you think about all the money that's gone to waste on feeding people like this, huh? __________________ If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg

10-31-2003, 04:01 PM	#9 (permalink)
GakFace Go Ninja, Go Ninja Go!! Location: IN, USA	great points already made. Aside from that no one stated out, that the bible says Judgement day. The last day is Judgement day right? So why give up the the race when you get to condemn them all! (yes I'm a christian, but hey if you created a race and they pissed you off, wouldn't you rather wanna have a judgement day and condemn them all rather then just forget about them?) __________________ RoboBlaster: Welcome to the club! Not that I'm in the club. And there really isn'a a club in the first place. But if there was a club and if I was in it, I would definitely welcome you to it.

10-31-2003, 05:19 AM	#4 (permalink)
phukraut Addict	how would your friend know about the conversation jesus had with god?

10-31-2003, 08:53 AM	#6 (permalink)
Macheath Junkie Location: Sydney, Australia	So what, now Jesus is gone for good and we're suddenly free from all of that cross-your-fingers-follow-the-rules-and-wait-stuff that people use to manipulate each other? I don't think so.

10-31-2003, 01:58 PM	#8 (permalink)
Gun Banned Location: Long Island	Don't believe it all. Only witnesses were soldiers under fire in an environment where bright flashes and other such phenomena are frequent and expected? That's not too stable if you ask me.

10-31-2003, 07:02 PM	#10 (permalink)
glytch I am not permanent. Location: Tennessee	Well, maybe forgetting about us is the same as condemning us, if you look at it from a Christian point of view (which I don't pretend to understand). __________________ If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg

10-31-2003, 09:24 PM	#11 (permalink)
nefarious Insane Location: Tucson, AZ	it sounds very unlikely that the all knowing omnipresent JC would make a mistake like that .. where was the source of the information? quite a funny thing to hear. according to the church i had to attend while living with parents, jesus will be returning after this: the U.S. goes into deep debt. the catholic church pays the debt. now everything becomes owned by the catholic church, which begins to prosecute all non-catholic christians. christians leave in the rapture. california sinks into the ocean. somehow war breaks out and russia bombs out U.S. leaving nothing but a smoldering nuclear heap. the lord appears in the sky. end of world and white throne judgment. Hows that ? ^_^ __________________ Si vis pacem, para bellum. - Vegetius "Do Re Mil.3, Prol.

11-01-2003, 08:15 AM	#12 (permalink)
Spinach_Indeed Banned? Location: Artic Tundra	...When everything becomes owned by the Catholic Church, I'll finally break down and lay naked on the Street and wait for Jesus. I hope he'll wear a Hat. A Top Hat __________________ Spinach in Need is Spinach Indeed

11-09-2003, 07:36 PM	#13 (permalink)
tecoyah Illusionary	Many learned people consider jesus to be an avatar(one who recalls all past lives) and if this is the case, there have been many returns....the buddah included. actualy I guess that would make jesus a return of buddah. anyway...some say sai baba in india is a living avatar right now as he does many of the miracles attributed to jesus and such....would be amazing if true __________________ Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

11-10-2003, 05:45 AM	#14 (permalink)
glytch I am not permanent. Location: Tennessee	The Avatar theory is very interesting. Is there anywhere I can go to read up on it? __________________ If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. - Mitch Hedberg

11-10-2003, 11:36 PM	#15 (permalink)
nz_TonTo Upright Location: New Zealand	Someone else has touched on this a few posts up, but im going to post anyway. If Jesus did indeed say something along the lines of "give up on these humans", then we wouldn't be here right now. If God agreed and said "yeah, lets pull the plug on the whole operation" that would mean only one thing...The end of the world. that is of course if Jesus/God exist(ed)

11-11-2003, 04:03 PM	#16 (permalink)
muckluck Psycho	I say the bright flash was a secret weapon and the highly religious enemy thought it was Jesus. Either that or Some drunk guy in a bar said it and someone there thought it was cool,and I think Jesus would be invulnerable to any attack. __________________

11-11-2003, 04:14 PM	#17 (permalink)
anti fishstick Post-modernism meets Individualism AKA the Clash Location: oregon	i dont think hearsay is a good source of evidence at all. __________________ And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom. ~Anais Nin

12-06-2003, 02:08 AM	#25 (permalink)
ChrisJericho eat more fruit Location: Seattle	Sorry, that story is incorrect. Jesus the historical figure died thousands of years ago. __________________ "A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows us that faith proves nothing." - Friedrich Nietzsche

11-12-2003, 04:22 AM	#18 (permalink)
wannabenakid247 Registered User Location: Wales, UK	I don't think theres much truth in that. It would be horrible if there was though and we were all doomed.

11-12-2003, 05:39 PM	#19 (permalink)
Jay Francis Psycho Location: Houston, Texas	So much of the New Testament is based on older works, I suspect that Yeshua (Jesus) never existed.

11-12-2003, 06:28 PM	#20 (permalink)
nefarious Insane Location: Tucson, AZ	if god gave up on us humans here one planet earth .. is there perchance an alternate universe in which things dont go wrong? .. the bible dates back more than 2000 years .. wouldnt that be a monstrous waste if after that long it all goes to shit? although "a day with god is a thousand years for man," and vice versa. __________________ Si vis pacem, para bellum. - Vegetius "Do Re Mil.3, Prol.

11-14-2003, 08:58 AM	#21 (permalink)
tecoyah Illusionary	Understood that"the bible" goes back 2000 yrs. but many religious texts predate it by centuries. no mention of jesus in these...buddah and others though...perhaps it all goes back to the avatar theory, maybe they are all correct in ways and inaccurate in others...hmmmm, sounds like a book written by humans if you ask me. It would certainly make for a more pleasant world if fundimentalists of all sects, just opened the mind for a few minutes each day and accepted the differences inherent in humanity. There is no GOD, that would be to easy. But there is something. __________________ Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

12-05-2003, 09:59 PM	#24 (permalink)
Spire Tilted	jesus woulda learned his lesson about what happens when he comes here acting better than us story is bullshit made up for kicks

12-08-2003, 09:59 AM	#26 (permalink)
geodaro Psycho	ONe thing is for sure, if Jesus did come to Earth and check out the current state of "humanity", then he would high-tail it back to heaven and give up on all us infidels! P.S. The world in general, not just human civilization, has been in a state of decline since the beginning....it's called the second law of thermodynamics (Entropy) and it is an unavoidible reality. Sorry.