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Old 10-26-2003, 01:49 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Questions about the Hymen

My girlfriend is a virgin but ive fingered her, and no sign of blood or anything. How far in is the hymen? She says that it might already be broken from general wear and tear since shes almost 18 by now. I fingered her, i didnt see or feel any signs of it, u guys still think its there? I just want to know for sure before we have sex, and want to know what to do in the situation....
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Old 10-26-2003, 01:55 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Well... go slow. If you break it, you break it, and she'll be a little sore. There will probably be blood, but most likely only a little. You can wipe it up easy enough, nothing huge.

And about not seeing blood or anything, you'll know when you break it- she will be quite vocal about it.
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Old 10-26-2003, 02:16 AM   #3 (permalink)
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it's also possible that she has no hymen at this point in life. Either due to vigorous exercise, masterbation, tampon use or many other reasons. The three virgins I've been with did not have one. Not unusual in this day and age. Women don't lead the type of life they used to. Additionally, If I remember correct, there are a significant amount of women that are born without one, but i could be wrong (I'll let a learned female answer that one)

As far as the situation, don't worry about it. You'll find out soon enough. Like analog says "go slow." Learn as much as you can about your woman, and don't be rushed. When it comes time, be gentle and listen to her (both vocal and body language).

Last edited by matt_mll; 10-26-2003 at 02:19 AM..
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Old 10-26-2003, 08:06 AM   #4 (permalink)
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As far as I know, I never had one. No sports, no tampons, and, at the time I lost my virginity, no mastrubation. My boyfriend thought that I really wasn't a virgin since I didn't have one, which led to many problems. So it is a huge possibility that she never had one, as well. My theory is- who cares? It isn't a big deal, so don't make one of it.
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Old 10-26-2003, 09:55 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rubyee
My theory is- who cares? It isn't a big deal, so don't make one of it.
True that. There are way more important things about a persons first sexual experiance than this.
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Old 10-26-2003, 10:20 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I've always wondered.

Assuming she has one, and you have to break through it... wouldn't it hurt like hell for both of you? I can't stand the thought of jabbing my penis into a solid structure. How easily does it give?
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Old 10-26-2003, 10:37 AM   #7 (permalink)
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The hymen gives rather easily. It's very common for it to be broken simply by tampons or fingering by the girl or her guy. I'm not sure about the subject of women just not having them - I don't know anything about that. It is rather permeable and fairly light. It does cause some bleeding but not a great amount. Personally when mine was broken it didn't really begin bleeding right away. I had some mild bleeding for about 2 or 3 days. For me it wasn't particularly painful. Slightly uncomfortable. Just go slow and be gentle and you'll be safe. She'll let you know if it's uncomfortable.
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Old 10-26-2003, 10:47 AM   #8 (permalink)
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phunktastic, it's not a concrete wall. It's more like....a damp fruit rollup. An easily teared membrane.
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Old 10-26-2003, 12:39 PM   #9 (permalink)
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haha,, ok thanks guys.

One less thing to worry about
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Old 10-26-2003, 12:50 PM   #10 (permalink)
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The Hymen is kinda like that seal on a Snapple Bottle. It it is broken then someone has tampered with it... lol.
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Old 10-26-2003, 01:04 PM   #11 (permalink)
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It is possible that she might have just broken it in everyday life... I didn't bleed my first time. I was active in dance, cheer, and a few other sports. Never masturbated-ever. We were taught in school that activities that are a part of everyday life can break it.
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Old 10-26-2003, 04:50 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I ve been with a couple of virgins and I found it pretty hard to break. Once broken it was easy to get mr Wiggly in but that firsst time with them it was very difficult. Maybe every girl is different
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Old 10-26-2003, 07:10 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lunchbox7
Maybe every girl is different
Maybe?
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Old 10-26-2003, 07:20 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I thought "The Hymen" was a Jewish holiday?
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Old 10-27-2003, 07:16 AM   #15 (permalink)
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lots of good advice up here ^___ . I'd reiterate this point: You've got lots of other things to think about besides the hymen when faced with a females first sexual experience.
 
Old 10-27-2003, 07:42 AM   #16 (permalink)
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I have been there for a girl's first time twice (one girlfriend and my wife on our wedding night). The experiences were completely different. On my girlfriend, it broke quickly, there was a little bleeding, and sex was pretty comfortable for her quickly. There was actually very little drama (but I really didn't know much about women at that time). With my wife, it was completely different. She had never been fingered before let alone having a penis inserted. There was actually a large amount of blood (happens to about 10% of women per the doctor in the hospital later that night). She was in pain and bleeding. That pretty much killed the honeymoon and helped her to associate sex with pain for a little time. It got better in a month or so. I remember being pretty sensitive to her that night, but given the situation, it was hard to be as good as I know I could have been. I had been celibate for a year, etc.
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Old 10-29-2003, 10:55 AM   #17 (permalink)
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yep, different for all women. i had a bleeder once and it scared the crap out of me. it was not just a little blood, it soaked her blue jeans and even the carpet pretty thoroughly.
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Old 10-29-2003, 11:49 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Count_Khocula
yep, different for all women. i had a bleeder once and it scared the crap out of me. it was not just a little blood, it soaked her blue jeans and even the carpet pretty thoroughly.
Woah, I would have freaked out. Plus people would think you were deflowering virgins or you were murdering someone!
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Old 10-29-2003, 12:12 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by raeanna74
The hymen gives rather easily. . . . Just go slow and be gentle and you'll be safe. She'll let you know if it's uncomfortable.
Different circumstances for different people.

Many years ago, I had a girlfriend who had an industrial strength hymen. We tried half a dozen times to have intercourse - with no luck. I didn't want to push too hard, as I didn't want to hurt her - perhaps I was being <i>too</i> cautious. When I went home for spring break, I suggested she see a doctor to have it surgically "broken."

Long story short - I didn't see her again until nearly twenty years later - in a town 100 miles away from where we'd met. The first thing she said to me while I was giving her a hug was "Don't we have some unfinished business to attend to?" Unfortunately, she was married (very unhappily) at the time, so, even though she was game - I declined (oh so reluctantly). <i>Sigh . . .</i>
That would have been a great reward for a 20-year wait.

Hope you're happier now, Tammi.
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Last edited by yournamehere; 10-29-2003 at 02:01 PM..
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Old 12-16-2003, 09:46 PM   #20 (permalink)
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I just wanna say thanks, I was curious on this subject, and was thinking of starting a thread (since search is down I couldn't just search) but I found it! Great info guys and gals!
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