BCD

Some of my best sex "moves" I've learned from simply asking female friends for tips (almost always asked and answered after several cocktails). For example, when I just started having sex as a foolish teenager, a platonic friend told me about how a boyfriend of hers would do her doggie-style, while reaching around and rubbing her clit. That was a pretty good move for me to add to my repetoire, given that I was very inexperienced at the time. Another hot little chicka from college told me that she loved it when one guy she dated would get her lips and clit massively engourged and then give firm, fast, repetitive two-finger "taps" (increasing in intensity to hard enough to be considered a "slap") on her lips and clit, provided that things remained lubricated by rubbing her juices on the surface being tapped. Would love to hear some other great moves from the ladies.

bing bing

wear a condom.

lurkette

Do everything half as fast and half as hard as you think you should, unless we ask otherwise.

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SabrinaFair

My best advice is more from an emotional standpoint than a physical one...make sure your partner knows you are sharing this experience with her, not just doing something to her. If that makes any sense. Make eye contact, smile, say something other than, "Wow, that feels good." Make sure she knows its HER your making love to, not just her bodily orrafice.

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-Anders

Ask the woman you're sleeping with, you wont find any better advise to get her going than asking her.

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Paq

Definitely ask, my current gf was shocked that i took so much interest and asked so many questions about what pleases her. Turns out, i found out quite a few things i would never have guessed, like lightly stroking her stomach/pelvic area is a real turnon...I had no clue...I lightly stroke areas of skin, but it would never occur to me that her stomach was so sensitive

unless it's a one night stand, just ask. if it's a one night stand, she'll tell you

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ratbastid

And if you do that right, it's not "unless", it's "until".

I'm not a girl, but I play one on TV.

Oh.. No I don't... sorry.

anti fishstick

so true.

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skysooner

Yes, the same things that worked on old girlfriends left my wife cold (mainly because she is so ticklish). You have to ask and then ask again what turns her on. She might now know exactly or she may feel too embarassed to tell you. It took awhile before I convinced my wife that I actually enjoy giving oral sex to her. She used to orgasm with it and then went a long time without. It was mainly a mental block as she thought that I couldn't possibly enjoy it. Now she is back to getting off almost every time.

BCD

Thanks for all the great replies. The only problem is that when I ask her what she likes or what I can do differently, she remarks that she likes everything exactly the way I do it. As with every clueless guy, I think I'm good at sex, but I know that I can improve. I think her response is more the result of her being shy / self-concious when in comes to talking about sex. Maybe I should pump her full of champagne or tequilla some night to get her true thoughts...

magua

Some women either won't be able to tell you, or won't want to.

I think it's one of those gender gaps. A guy thinks, "Well, if I do this, and that, and then do the other thing, we're off TO THE MOON!", and the girl thinks, "What am I? Some list to be checked off?"

Or, to be balanced and phrase it from the other point of view, the guy wants to know what he can do to make it better for the girl, but the girl wants him to know without having to ask. One of those, "Are you paying attention to me?" deals.

My advice:
1) Ask the first few times, but don't pester. If she doesn't say, don't keep bringing it up.
2) After you've settled into a grove, experiment every once in awhile and do something new. If she likes it, keep it, if not, toss it.

If she's really shy, it may be easier for her to express it during a game or dream or fantasy of some sort. Just don't laugh. =P

motdakasha

As my teacher says, "It's all about the clit." Usually.
Don't forget the breasts and neck, though!

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ratbastid

You're really enjoying this class, aren't you?

Parkhurst

Getting someone drunk to get into their head rather than their pants. What a novel idea, it may just catch on.

motdakasha

Maybe.

Also, don't forget to remind us how sexy we are!

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vveronica

Well two things I would add... 1) forget this tapping idea, where the hell does that comes from...... 2) A point no one mentioned here "Plan on using your tongue!"

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BCD

vveronica, thanks for the response. Just goes to show you that everyone is different. My current girl LUUUVVVS that tapping thing It is the first thing she begs for when she is really horny. Have you ever tried it?

Hopefully everyone just assumed that the need to use the tongue was a given, at least it was for me. Got any suggestions on a particular use for the tongue?

onionmon

I like how there are WAAYYYYY more viewers of this topic than repliers. the ratio just boasts the other topix

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Guy Spenzz

Very rarely has other peoples advice worked on my girlfriend. For instance, she loves it when I nibble on her clit or suck hard on it. But ive heard many times from many people "never use your teeth" or "dont suck on the clit". I think its best to get to know your partners fantasies by asking. or through experementation, also my girlfriend likes it hard and fast.

Lebell

"What's wrong with a kiss, boy?? Why all this leaping straight to the clitoris??"

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sexymama

I still believe the best sex tip is to make love to her all day long. In other words, call her just to say you care; snuggle just because; passionately kiss her goodbye (don't just peck her); tell her how attractive you find her; praise her for more than her looks; write her "love notes;" touch her, touch her, touch her -- did I mention touch her?

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flamingdog

If I'd have done that with my ex she would have told me to fuck right off and leave her alone.

Incidentally, that's not why she's my ex.

Paq

ahha, some women would love the "touch her touch her touch her" all day long idea, others would bitchslap you for being a little weenie...

i've been with both and yeah, just experiment, play, ask, etc with your current flame and you'll be much better off

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Ace_O_Spades

Its all about trying new things if you're taking other people's advice

No two women like EXACTLY the same thing, so if you just go off what people here are saying you're missing out.

But i guess it's the only option you have if she's brushing off the topic.

Try asking her when she's really horny, she wont lie

gabshu

Dude, I love the tapping.

Don´t be too tough with the clit, it hurts if you are

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*Nikki*

Yeah definately don't leave out the foreplay!! That is the most importent part!

fhqwhgads

"She comes twice before she even sees my penis."

Good advice from an old friend.

Ace_O_Spades

thats pretty bold, what if you have a woman who takes a while to cum

the unselfish approach will be a new thing for many guys

Myself, I try to warm up the oven a little... working eachother along at an equal pace, seems to have worked in the past.

Its like conducting a professional orchestra

fhqwhgads

What's the hurry?

Ace_O_Spades

good point

but by a while, im sayin like a good 45 minutes of serious attention to reach orgasm, my girlfriend usually takes a while to get there, but has one extremely powerful one, which requires her to have some recuperation time afterwards

i dont think that im a bad lover, she even said her previous boyfriends took her even longer to get off... its just the kind of girl she is

motdakasha

Right. And women never have to wait for men to recuperate, that is, if the man even goes back to business. At least women are willing to have another go the majority of the time (warning: overgeneralization).

Statistically speaking, women aren't ready for sex when their partner initiates it *more than* 50% of the time.

I'm not bitter!

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Ace_O_Spades

that was extremely bitter!

and that was an extreme overgeneralization, but i'll let it slide cuz im such a nice guy

why do you think i wasn't complaining about it? because it is a two way street!

pules

You are so correct on what you're saying. Sometimes I get so frustrated with my gf because she just won't come out and tell me what she likes or wants. With her it's like pulling teeth, even though I really want to make her feel good. I've been working on this issue for couple of years now, and I'm making some head way. The stories my friends have told me just make me so frustrated. Don’t get me wrong, I love my gf. Compared to the stories I’ve heard and some stuff I’ve seen, she is by far the best Girlfriend a guy could have. She is beautiful, smart and hella sexy, but sometimes she can be pretty typical girlish. I’m really happy I have her in my life

InTeGrA77

that's probably the best one that I can think of too...

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Prince

I've only one advice to give:

Listen.

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omega2K4

Snuggling rocks.

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PorscheBunny

You want general tips? How about 40 of them?

http://www.evilgoddess.com/men.html

(Thanks to ktthequeen for pointing this one out for us in the Ladies Lounge.)

RIP Sam Kinnison

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aphex140

lol good link



Loved the comment about socks, was very concious oif this and try and remove them with the trousers, which can cause problems.


My advise everyone is an individual - talk in a frank manner. But the clit rubbing while doing it doggie style is an old gem.

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ariekitten

ask the girl since all are different. foreplay is good. letting her know that SHE is special to you and not just her CUNT...that's important. other than that, i would say it varies from person to person.

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Andy

You could ask.. but I think a lot of girls would be more turned on if you surprised them with something they liked.

It would be cool to see more tips on this thread if anyone has some.. Then each of us can personally sort through and decide which ones we feel comfortable trying.

Here's a couple that worked differently on different girls:

One liked having the lower corners of her back licked/sucked.

One liked having bout 1/3 of a finger in her ass during sex.

Um, yeah and that 2nd one surprised me.