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Old 05-04-2003, 04:42 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Location: the 'Ville
Too much drama...help?

This has been a fucked up weekend, and I'm at about wits end on what to do. Tell me what yall think.

Last August my ex-gf Laur and I broke up after dating for 3 years. She was about to enter college and I had already been here for a year. We are from a small town and became best friends while we dated. After we broke up, we were still best friends. we fooled around a few times after we broke up but cut that off after a couple of times. We're still best friends. I love the girl to death as my best friend, but shes a mental case. She needs to be in therapy and probably needs some prozac(her family has problems with mental illness). After we broke up, I was an emotional wreck for a while and she moved on. After I moved on, she dated a guy but then came calling back to me. I told her we couldnt get back together now. We progressed as friends. Last Thursday we ended up fucking because she jumped my balls, and I cant turn down sex.

Friday I go to see my sister who lives an hour away. I hung out with her and her roomie for a while, and eventually one of her friends who I have been "talking" with comes over and we go hang out for a while. While we were out, Kate(my sisters friend that I'm interested in) and I joke that we should go back to my place. Kate wants to go, so we leave that nite and drive back to my place where we just watch movies and cuddle all night. My sister tells Laur that me and Kate are coming back to my place for the night, and Laur goes into fits. Laur calls me crying and ranting about how she hates Kate and cant believe that I am doing all of this. Laur spends the rest of the night on the edge, and the next day calls saying shes going to my sisters. I was taking Kate home and ended up going to my sisters(they live in the same town) and waiting on Laur so we can have a talk about whats gone on.

Laur eventually gets there and goes on about how she had fallen back in love with me and wants to date again. She has known for almost 3 months that Ive liked Kate but had hangups about having a relationship with her(Age and Distance). I eventually drove back home last nite while Laur stayed with my sister. Kate ended up coming over to see my sister and it just made things worse. Its been a bad weekend for all parties involved.

My sister things Kate is crazy, and ended up telling her that. Laur has gone into another depression cycle. Kate feels bad for causing things. And I'm torn between all of the people. I havent decided if I'm gonna pursue dating Kate yet because of the distance(1 hour). I feel bad for leading her on though. I guess its my problem for being too nice a guy. What should I do?
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Old 05-04-2003, 06:18 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Once a relationship ends, don't start it over again. Trust me, you will regret it one day, and you'll be really pissed off at yourself for getting back with the same crazy chic that caused you so much grief the first time.
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Old 05-04-2003, 06:37 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Northern Virginia
Leave Laur be. Tell her you have moved and don't look back. You are not responsible for healing her. You are doing more damage sending her wrong signals(aka "fucking") amd then date someone else. You'd fuck up any woman's emotions and feelings by doing that. If you know her mental status ain't so good, then don't play with it. She has difficulty with coping with her feelings and you aren't helping by sending her crossed signals. In terms of Kate, if you feel something is there, then pursue her and leave Laur alone. If Kate knows what you did with Laur, she is getting crossed signals too. If you don't stop this, you will lose everyone. Get some control over your dick,man. Also, your relationships will never work well when your sister talks too much and gets this involved. Whatever you decide do it on your own. Good Luck And if you decide to pass on both of them, go become a writer for a soap opera, you're a natural. Phew!
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Old 05-04-2003, 07:19 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: South of the border
Does Kate know that you screwer Laur? Does Laur know that you're not interested in her? Cuz they should. Probably you dont mean it, but you're messing with their feelings dude...
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Old 05-05-2003, 02:45 AM   #5 (permalink)
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tell laur you don't want her that way anymore. you'll have to make sure you can turn down sex from her too.
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Old 05-06-2003, 09:26 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
originally posted by wraithhibn
I guess its my problem for being too nice a guy. What should I do?
Exactly how did you come to this conclusion? It seems to me that you're the cause, center of, and instigator of the problem, buddy boy.

You continue to keep sleeping with the ex-girlfriend, even though she might be mentally unstable and need help......hmmm.

You brought this 'Kate' girl into the soap opera of your life, even though you have 'distance issues' with her......hmmmm

Now everybody's mad at one another and dealing drama because
1- you can't keep it in your pants and show self-restraint (even in your own best interests, mind you)
2- because your such a 'nice guy'

I don't understand. You've caused all this. You've got to fix it.
If you were serious about 'Kate' I'd tell you to hang in there and try to get the ex-girlfriend some help, but as it stands the best thing you could do is leave both of them alone and run far far away.
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