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Old 05-03-2004, 03:56 PM   #1 (permalink)
Tilted
 
Location: Manhattan Island
Does your SO know about and/or surf the TFP?

I was just thinking about what in incredibly great place this is today. It is rare that you can find such a wealth of information on the internet and find answers to almost any question. I love to browse and occasionally post in the 'Tilted Sexuality' section as well as many of the others. Being as this is such a great place and has so much information about human relations and sex and so on I would naturally like to be able to share this with my girlfriend. However, I'm not sure I would want to turn her on to this site. I would love for her to be able to read and contribute here but that would pretty much mean that I would be restricted from asking questions about our sex-life or relationship on this board. Now I haven't come across ANYTHING that we couldn't talk about with each other - and I really do love her more than I could possibly imagine - but the thought of giving up my ability to post freely and anonymously is what stops me from giving her the address.

The more I think about it the more I come to realize that I really can talk to her about anything at all so it wouldnt really matter if I gave up my ability to talk about our relationship to others without her knowing. Weve been together for a little more than 3 months now so it is still sort of new for both of us. Im sure Ill be able to let her in on this so we can explore the TFP together but I just dont think Im quite ready yet.

So what is your situation? Does your SO know about this site? Do they know that you post here? Do both of you share the experience and post together?

Just curious

Thanks!
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Old 05-03-2004, 04:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
soaring
 
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Location: near the water
Umm, i first learned about TFP through my SO, because he's a regular here. You can always tell her about it, but just not let her know what your username is. Sometimes you will find out more about her that way because she might be more honest if she would ever reply to one of your posts.

Be warned though, if you use TFP as a place to openly express yourself, be sure that you are comfortable with her knowing who you are. Good luck
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Old 05-03-2004, 04:11 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Location: Manhattan Island
hehe - I would never want us to both be on here and not know who each other are. I don't know, that just seems sort of sneaky or something. I'm confident that we have enough communication with each other and that she really does know who I am. So like I said I'm sure I will be letting her in on it, just not right now as things are still new. :-)
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Old 05-03-2004, 04:40 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: California
Nwlinkxvd introduced me to the TFP, and now I'm hooked. AAAHHHHHHH!

It's fun and in some ways, it can help you learn about each other through something other than blunt speech.

Anyway my opinion on posting here is if you can't express your opinion on the TFP, then you should really start communicating more.
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Old 05-03-2004, 05:43 PM   #5 (permalink)
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she is the one who keeps going back to the titty board (we peruse it together)
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Old 05-03-2004, 06:31 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Location: Somewhere just beyond the realm of sanity...
ha don't do it the second she learns how to use the search function by name you're jewed. First she read about me and my EX and got all sad. Then she posted about what she named my penis or something and my buddy learned how to use the search function.

Great times. I don't really care, but girls get diaries and stuff guys get TFP, you don't want her reading your "diary" do you?
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Old 05-03-2004, 06:41 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I told my gf about the board but I never told her where it is!

She has her Cosmo for sex ideas and I have the board! Thanks TFP!
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Old 05-03-2004, 07:05 PM   #8 (permalink)
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My boyfriend told me about TFP actually. And he volunteered his name. So I registered and was just messing around to see what all I could do..and discovered that you can see everyones posts! Bad idea..don't recommend reading SO's posts. Other then that its a great tool for information. I really like getting other people's opinions on certain questions.
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Old 05-03-2004, 07:12 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Location: There's no place like home..
a friend told me about tfp but wouldn't tell me what it was. so i checked it out and was hooked. And from there I got a few friends and my boyfriend hooked. Although i can't remember if we were dating at that time or not. Either way we are dating now and we both use tfp! I don't think it should be an issue of not telling her/him. If you can't tell them, then maybe the lines of communication aren't open all the way.
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Old 05-03-2004, 08:25 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: Yonder
Know about TFP!? My wife moderates TFP!!

We're extremely open with each other anyway. We pretty much know what's going on with each other enough that there aren't many surprises left to find on the forums. Though there have been times I've been a little surprised that some personal conversation or thought would end up here.
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Old 05-03-2004, 08:35 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Location: Denver
I think it's really sad if you have something to say that you'd keep from your SO. As long as you're clear with each other on what's ok and what's not beforehand, it shouldn't be a problem... or so I'd think...
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Old 05-03-2004, 08:46 PM   #12 (permalink)
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ya, moonstrucksoul found the site first, through another site.
I followed right behind him.
 
Old 05-04-2004, 12:13 AM   #13 (permalink)
The one that got away
 
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Location: Over the hill and far away
My SO does not now about the site. She has some, to me, weird ideas about the internet, she thinks everybody who chats and writes on message boards like this one are either sexually deviant or weirdos. This is of course couldn't be farther from the truth, I'm doing it!
She has a very very hard time with porn, and she would instantly view this board as a Porn Mothership, which it isn't! Well, not mainly, anyway.
She knows I'm reading usenet newsgroups, and that's okay with her, as long as she can see the names of the groups, because she can see they don't have the word 'sex' in them...
Yes, it's annoying, but that's just the way it is. I love her, and I'd love to share this place with her and for her to post her thoughts and ideas, but she's just not that kind of person.
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Old 05-04-2004, 01:18 AM   #14 (permalink)
/nɑndəsˈkrɪpt/
 
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Location: LV-426
No, she doesn't. She's not much into the Internet thing, anyway, aside from email. She doesn't care one way or the other, and I visit many discussion boards... Although none of them as enticing and intelligent as the TFP.

I wouldn't mind sharing, but perhaps I'd feel less inclined to discuss our arguments or something.
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Old 05-04-2004, 01:32 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Location: everywhere else
Me and my girl discuss about the topics that are discussed here and I encourage her surf the tfp, but she just won't. She is just not curious. I have to admit I haven't told her about the exhibition place.
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Old 05-04-2004, 01:48 AM   #16 (permalink)
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My GF knows I go here. She has no issues.
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Old 05-04-2004, 03:59 AM   #17 (permalink)
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My gf just know i'm on a different forum becuase it's a different color. She doesn't like the net at all and really doesn't like porn, so I turn off imgs when she's home. hahaaha I need a NSFHome tag.
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Old 05-04-2004, 04:37 AM   #18 (permalink)
will always be an Alyson Hanniganite
 
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Location: In the dust of the archives
She knows about it, but doesn't come on. This is my space. I do, however, regale her, at times, with tales of your antics.
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Old 05-04-2004, 06:15 AM   #19 (permalink)
Runt
 
Location: Denver
She knows I frequent forums and is not interested in them. I guess the answer is no and she doesn't care.
Her thing is online gaming.
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Old 05-04-2004, 06:37 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Location: New England
This is the only thing that my wife doesn't know about me. I wouldn't be ashamed for her to know about anything that I've posted here... the only issue is that I spend a bunch of work time perusing this board. I'm ashamed about that, and because of that, I haven't told her about TFP.
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Old 05-04-2004, 06:38 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Location: Princeton, NJ
I think its got to be a balanceing act between your desire to share everything with her and the need everyone has to have their "space," be it a group of friends that are more yours then hers, a diary, a message board. If this is the your only space where you exist without her, i'd move very cautiously. But maybe that's just me .
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Old 05-04-2004, 08:37 AM   #22 (permalink)
Runt
 
Location: Denver
True.
That's one thing my wife and I have learned over the last 8 years. Everyone needs their space. Hence the reason I don't online game with her friends and she avoids my forums. Plus, her friends are her friends and my friends are....well...imaginary but we won't get into that.
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Old 05-04-2004, 09:26 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Location: The Netherlands
My SO knows about this board and is even a member here.
I actively recruited Marie here to share in the fun / discussions here, but she rarely visits. She's just not that interested in online discussions.

So, she knows I visit and I discuss topics that appear on this board with her, and she's fine with it.
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Old 05-04-2004, 10:35 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Location: Dallas, Texas
Interesting question. I often tell my SO about things I've read or posted on TFP and finally she got curious and asked for the address. I gave it to her and (much like the feeling you get when you realize you left your keys in the car just as the door slams shut) realized she was a bright little internet girl and would pick up on the username/search function post haste. I have at times written things here that might give her pause so yes fear did ripple through me for a moment but I decided what the hell, the damage is done and how mad could she possibly get? Well I was right. She IMMEDIATELY found the search function and pulled up all my posts. She just read a few and then said to me that she wouldn't go to the site anymore because it felt like she was reading my diary or something and didn't want to infringe on my privacy. I told her I didn't mind and go ahead (in for a penny in for a pound!) but she declined. I don't know what posts she read but they must have been some of the more personal ones. I admit I do feel I can be more open knowing she is not reading my posts but if she decided to thats ok too. Damn I love that woman!
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Old 05-04-2004, 11:09 AM   #25 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Oklahoma City
I told my wife about the site after I'd been on for a couple weeks. Now she out posts me 5 to 1. We're pretty honest in our relationship so I don't think either of us are going to read the others posts and be suprised about anything. I think we might even learn some new things about each other because the topics on these forums are so different than the ones that come up in real life.
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Old 05-04-2004, 11:21 AM   #26 (permalink)
I'm not a blonde! I'm knot! I'm knot! I'm knot!
 
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Location: Upper Michigan
Hubby introduced me to TFP. We both post - not at the same time. We both read each other's posts. Though I don't read as many of his cause he posts in cars and computers lots. Cars, I don't know much about and computers, I'm really rusty with computers. I post in the more general sections and he reads and sometimes replies even to my posts.

Might be something fun that you can share with each other about. Hubby and I alert each other to a particularly fetching lady in Exhibition or to some interesting article in sexuality or general discussion very often.
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Old 05-04-2004, 12:13 PM   #27 (permalink)
Insane
 
hu-man, I think you're mistaken. You're supposed to answer regarding YOUR wife...not mine.

/sounds like they're sisters. "That's sick, you're probably into that sick crap, aren't you????"
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Old 05-04-2004, 12:39 PM   #28 (permalink)
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Location: oregon
yes. i told Will about this place.
we post every now and then,
but it's become a way for us to bring up subjects or issues to ourselves more so than actually participating on the boards.
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Old 05-04-2004, 01:34 PM   #29 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: ...We have a problem.
Quote:
Originally posted by StephenSa
Interesting question. I often tell my SO about things I've read or posted on TFP and finally she got curious and asked for the address. I gave it to her and (much like the feeling you get when you realize you left your keys in the car just as the door slams shut) realized she was a bright little internet girl and would pick up on the username/search function post haste. I have at times written things here that might give her pause so yes fear did ripple through me for a moment but I decided what the hell, the damage is done and how mad could she possibly get? Well I was right. She IMMEDIATELY found the search function and pulled up all my posts. She just read a few and then said to me that she wouldn't go to the site anymore because it felt like she was reading my diary or something and didn't want to infringe on my privacy. I told her I didn't mind and go ahead (in for a penny in for a pound!) but she declined. I don't know what posts she read but they must have been some of the more personal ones. I admit I do feel I can be more open knowing she is not reading my posts but if she decided to thats ok too. Damn I love that woman!
This is the way it ought to be, methinks... My SO knows I post, I know he posts, but do we discuss it? Nope. Would I rather him look at free porn instead of pay for it? Yep, if he's going to look at porn that is...
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Old 05-04-2004, 07:05 PM   #30 (permalink)
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My SO was a member here first. He kept it a secret and then one night I caught him surfing the titty boards. Then he told me about this place. A few days later I went in and checked it out and also his posts. Have to say I was not the slightest bit happy with his posts but we got over and past it. I enjoy this very much. I like to listen to other people's troubles and think...oh wow I am not the only one? Or look at others photography, ect....And then sometimes I find an interesting article and ask my SO to read it so we could compare thoughts.
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Old 05-05-2004, 12:08 AM   #31 (permalink)
The one that got away
 
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Location: Over the hill and far away
Quote:
Originally posted by PDOUBLEOP
hu-man, I think you're mistaken. You're supposed to answer regarding YOUR wife...not mine.

/sounds like they're sisters. "That's sick, you're probably into that sick crap, aren't you????"
Hah, glad to know I'm not the only one. Let's start a club!
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Old 05-05-2004, 12:48 AM   #32 (permalink)
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Location: Sexymama's arms...
My SO is sexymama and she was interested in the site before she was my SO.
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