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Old 07-30-2004, 10:56 PM   #1 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: South Florida
Little problem about hanfjobs

Hey, I got a little snag here. My girlfriend and I have been getting more intimate, we arn't having sex yet but we do want to give eachother some pleasure. I've been able to get her off, I'm pretty sure, using my hands although she doesnt want me under the panty yet. She aswell seems bent on making me have a good time by going for the handjob: Here lies the snag. We are in my bed and I'm still somewhat clothed. See it's simplier to get her off, there's no mess. But with a guy, obviously, theres more clean up involved. That's really made me wary of getting off to a handjob cause I dont want to be washing my sheet constantly or rush off to clean the cum outta my pants. I've talked to her about it before and she understands. But she really wants to give me the same feeling im giving her and she has gone back to doing it. I have to keep teling her to slow down or stop and sometimes holding it back can become a bear, not to mention the blueball effect. I want to cum but i don't know the best way to deal with the mess, plus I have no idea how shes going to react to getting cum on her. I know I have to talk to her again but I want to go in with some solutions. Really what i'm looking for is a way for me to cum and have it be as mess less as possible without it ruining the romance toomuch. How to I deal with a handjob?
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Old 07-30-2004, 10:59 PM   #2 (permalink)
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towel on your lap?
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Old 07-30-2004, 11:01 PM   #3 (permalink)
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or a condom?
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Old 07-30-2004, 11:01 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Grab a paper towel beforehand.

Just don't let your parents see you take a paper towel and then disappear in your room with your gf for 30 mins every time she comes over

Toilet paper isn't as good as a paper towel because paper towels have enough area to catch everything. A handful of toilet paper isn't as large as a paper towel.
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Old 07-30-2004, 11:08 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Location: South Florida
Seems that's what I must do, kills the spontenaity of it but if she's serious enough about doing it, we will have to be serious enough to talk about it more. Looks like I'll have to bring it up and see what she thinks.
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Old 07-30-2004, 11:26 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Keep a roll in one of you drawers. Once things start getting hot and heavy, bust one out.
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Old 07-30-2004, 11:45 PM   #7 (permalink)
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How bout pulling up your shirt and let it hit your chest...then wipe down later.
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Old 07-31-2004, 12:11 AM   #8 (permalink)
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go for the condom - be sure to but a little lub inside before you put it on.
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Old 07-31-2004, 09:56 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Handkerchef, tissues, or towels work well.

My question is, how old are you and how long have you been going out? I mean, sexually speaking, if you're over 16, then this girl seems to have some personal comfort/acceptance issues. Also, if you are older and live alone / with a roommate, then why are you worried about a mess?
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Old 07-31-2004, 12:06 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Isn't the mess worth it?
Cleanup would be the last thing i'd be thinking about the whole while.
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Old 07-31-2004, 12:17 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Last edited by insidious_machinae; 03-20-2010 at 10:51 AM..
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Old 07-31-2004, 12:31 PM   #12 (permalink)
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One of the best things about sex is the mess.

Sounds to me like you two shouldn't be having sex. People are different but if you're worried about the clean up more than the act then it seems as if you two lack a certain level of maturity that a couple should have before they engage in such acts. Couple that with the cum fear and the fact that she isn't comfortable enough to offer you more than through the panty sexual stimulation and you've got a relationship going places it isn't ready to be going.

I understand you aren't going to go straight from a first kiss to anal fisting but it sounds like you guys might need to slow it down a few notches. More importantly than anything else, talk it out.

(Nothing I've said was meant in an offensive manner. Good luck.)
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Old 07-31-2004, 01:06 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by MEAD
I've been able to get her off, I'm pretty sure,

See it's simplier to get her off, there's no mess. \
If you were truly "getting her off",( that expression shows such caring) then you wouldn't be sure, you'd know for certain, and it's not "simple" to get a woman off - you sure she's not faking?
Quote:
Originally posted by TM875
if you're over 16, then this girl seems to have some personal comfort/acceptance issues.
16 is not the magic age when all girls/women are ready for sexual situations. It doesn't mean that she's got any issues at all.
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Old 07-31-2004, 02:42 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Seems simple enough to me

I have not done this is a long time but..

Way back when I used to go see a porn flick..in a theather..I would make a pad out of Tolite Paper --placed in my underware to asorb the mess.

You may find that this interferes with her rubbing. ...So the next time you talk to her about this...Just let her know you have that wad of TP inside your underware and , well just get your hand down in the underware just the moment before you go off.

As to making a mess on the sheets...I suspect that a wet dream or three will do that for you anyway.
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Old 07-31-2004, 05:10 PM   #15 (permalink)
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i would say keep a roll of toilet paper or box of kleenex. when you're ready, just have her or you keep your hand over the head and keep it all in your palm and use the kleenex.

or condom ...
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Old 07-31-2004, 06:13 PM   #16 (permalink)
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When you get yourself off, what do you do with the come then? Isn't it the same thing? You give yourself a handjob, she gives you a handjob, it's the same thing. However you deal with the come when it's just you, do the same when it's with her.

I say have an old t-shirt by the bed, a towel, some tissues, or anything everyone's suggested. Make it land on your chest or stomach, like someone else suggested, then just relax for a few minutes to calm down and enjoy that post-orgasm feeling, then just wipe it up. Easy.

If your girlfriend's worried about getting come on her hands then I might tend to agree with Manic_Skafe, that she shouldn't be doing this. Come isn't dirty, it may be sticky but that's half the fun of sex. If she's too weirded out by it to just wash her hands, then perhaps you guys should slow it down.
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Old 07-31-2004, 06:14 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by maleficent

16 is not the magic age when all girls/women are ready for sexual situations. It doesn't mean that she's got any issues at all.
I'm not saying that there's a magic halo around 16 - I was using it as an example of maturity. I do truly believe that once a person reaches a decent age (somewhere near the cusp of adulthood), that they need to get over the whole "omg i can't let him touch me or else that means i'm a slut!!1one" or the "he wants to put his hands WHERE?! that's icky and i'm not ready for it!!11" stage. If she isn't comfortable with A) herself and her body and B) you touching that body, then this relationship has defineable problems.

Just a thought, but maybe you should work on those, first...
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Old 07-31-2004, 06:30 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Quote:
See it's simplier to get her off, there's no mess.
If you ever get to experience female ejaculation you'd change your tune.

I think the answer really is that if you two can't handle the mess, then you aren't ready for it at this point in your relationship. Because, really, a mess is just a mess, there is no meaning behind it and messes are easily cleaned up. It is definitely an intimacy issue... and the more intimate you get, the messier it should be. It is nice to read you consideration for her, now take that consideration and communicate with her. As much as we say to you, it all comes down to you two and what you're comfortable with.
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Old 07-31-2004, 07:48 PM   #19 (permalink)
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i'm all for taking it slow, but just out of curiosity how old are you and your gf?

if you're really worried about the cleanup, just keep a box of tissues handy, and either come in the tissue or make sure you aim at something you can easily clean up, like your stomach.
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Old 07-31-2004, 08:42 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Location: Don't worry about it.
While I don't share the opinion of telling you what you shoulden't be doing, or judging you by saying you aren't ready for what your doing, I'd just like to chime in.

Keep somthing near you, kleenex, somthing. Understand, at some point in your life, sexual activities will be messy.
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Old 07-31-2004, 09:10 PM   #21 (permalink)
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You need the after sex towel laying somewhere around your bed. Always have an after sex towel around.

Wash weekly or so or it will get stiff as a board.
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Old 08-01-2004, 04:33 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Some women reach the age of sexual matuity later, TM875. I just have to say that, because it peeves me that some guys just expect girls at a particular age to rip off their pants and yell something along the lines of "Touch me!"

First sexual expirences it can be a little strange for a girl. Espeically one that's shy. Now I'm not saying that it's the root of the problem here, but it could be something along those lines. Maybe she's not totally comfortable with herself naked - thus the panties. Maybe she's not totally comfortable with someone else seeing her naked - thus the panties. There's tons of reasons she could be doing what she's doing.

As far as clean up, do as the others suggest and keep a towel, shirt or something near by.

But do figure out what's going on with your girlfriend, have a heart to heart talk about where this relationship is going sexually and otherwise.
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Old 08-01-2004, 08:58 PM   #23 (permalink)
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I posted a similar thread a couple of months ago titled "Where to ejaculate?" There might be some things in there that can help you out.

http://tfproject.org/tfp/showthread....e+to+ejaculate
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Old 08-02-2004, 02:10 PM   #24 (permalink)
Upright
 
A sock. Thats my advice. While I've abstained from masturbation, I did get tired of cleanup when I did it, and I found that when your ready, put a sock over the end.

Make sure you do your own wash though
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Old 08-02-2004, 02:45 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Go for the condom. It would be good practice for the real thing and it feels better than a sock! lol
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Old 08-02-2004, 04:34 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Location: Toronto
Quote:
Originally posted by nwlinkvxd
Sorry, but I have my doubts.
LOL,

Yep, I guarantee she isn't getting off either.

No offense kid. You just keep going on the path you are on and you will figure it out.

Someday, you too will laugh with us.
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Old 08-02-2004, 04:37 PM   #27 (permalink)
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Location: Toronto
Quote:
Originally posted by Meier_Link
You need the after sex towel laying somewhere around your bed. Always have an after sex towel around.

Wash weekly or so or it will get stiff as a board.
ugh,

How bout wash after every use.
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Old 08-02-2004, 07:12 PM   #28 (permalink)
Upright
 
Do you want to wash the same towel three times a day?
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Old 08-02-2004, 07:23 PM   #29 (permalink)
Upright
 
Just blow it dude, seriously.. Figure it out later.
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Old 08-02-2004, 07:32 PM   #30 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: South Florida
Hmm, thanks for all that help guys, I talked to her again, and everything is A Okay. About her not being mature enough, she has had sex before, it wasnt her who wasnt mature enough, it was me. I had problems getting close to people, really she really helped me break those walls down, I was the one who told her I wanted to take the sex thing slow, But after the talk we got it straight that I wasnt hung up on that stuff anymore. Thanks for the concern guys, My biggest problem was finding out if I was ready yet and some time with her showed me I am.

Last edited by MEAD; 08-03-2004 at 12:36 PM..
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Old 08-02-2004, 07:38 PM   #31 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: South Florida
Quote:
Originally posted by james t kirk
LOL,

Yep, I guarantee she isn't getting off either.

No offense kid. You just keep going on the path you are on and you will figure it out.

Someday, you too will laugh with us.
Ha Im not taking any offense to that, though she does seem to enjoy it , if her making satisfied noises, heavy breathing, writhing around, pulling me closer, and seeming drained afterwards is any indication. Of course I'm happy to work harder, I know I can do better I didnt expect that to be the most satisfying thing ever.
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Old 08-02-2004, 08:41 PM   #32 (permalink)
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garbage can next to the bed....
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Old 08-03-2004, 09:51 AM   #33 (permalink)
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Location: Athens, OH
A guy who didn't want to rush into sex?

Now I've seen everything
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Old 08-03-2004, 12:49 PM   #34 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by Spicy McHaggis
A guy who didn't want to rush into sex?
Perhaps he's learned from past experience.
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