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Old 02-06-2005, 09:49 PM   #81 (permalink)
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Clairabelle in the back seat of a '39 Chevy----damn that girl was built like a G.I. can with both ends kicked out...
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Old 02-06-2005, 10:12 PM   #82 (permalink)
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Hmm, Weirdest thing was when I was little(er) I got about half into a extra large (by what i've seen usualy) spa bubble jet thing. Twas awsome .
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Old 02-07-2005, 12:25 AM   #83 (permalink)
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Hand.

Here's a little rule i go by "Don't put your dick where you wouldn't put your hands"

I read a post earlier in the thread about toilet paper rolls, And i have a vague memory of me trying that as a kid..It was only that one time, I figured..If i try to fuck this, It's gonna probably take some skin off.
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Old 02-18-2005, 02:17 PM   #84 (permalink)
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So I just read that "Guts" story, here at work.. closed it 2 times.. but couldnt go on without finishing.. I fnished.. I dont get grossed out by much of anything but all I have to say about that is ouchie and I dont know if there can be a strong enough disclaimer before people read it.
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Old 02-18-2005, 02:29 PM   #85 (permalink)
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There are some extremely creative people here... Lot's of good ideas here, ummmmmmmmmmmmm, gotsta go!
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Old 02-18-2005, 11:26 PM   #86 (permalink)
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In my younger days I would take one of those cheap blow up floaties, the kind that go around the arm, lube it up and put it between the mattress and the box springs.
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Old 06-03-2005, 08:45 AM   #87 (permalink)
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a sandwich baggie between the cushions of the couch ...
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Old 06-03-2005, 08:47 AM   #88 (permalink)
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A friend of mines sister.

God she was a nutcase.
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Old 06-03-2005, 09:52 AM   #89 (permalink)
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made a sex toy out of one of those computer wrist rest things, took the cloth outer part ogg, hollowed a bit of the gell stuff out and lubed up and went at it

worked surprisingly well exept for the size and the stickyness of the gell material :S
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Old 06-03-2005, 12:20 PM   #90 (permalink)
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Ive only ever used my hands as far as sticking my dick into anything goes. But I have kinda just held it infront of a jet in a fancy bath or hottub and its kinda like a water vibrator.

I also just finished reading that Guts story... Im a little sick right now, I am so thankfull as a kid I never stuck my dick anywhere but my hand. I also have to ask, was that Guts story true?
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Old 07-05-2005, 01:34 PM   #91 (permalink)
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inbetween the couch cushions. that actually hurt.
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Old 07-05-2005, 02:17 PM   #92 (permalink)
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My parents had on old glass half gallon milk bottle in their basement. I used to put vaseline inside the opening and fuck the bottle. It was great. Plus my load went right into the bottle. Nice, easy clean up!!!
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Old 07-06-2005, 03:54 PM   #93 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keist
Hmm, Weirdest thing was when I was little(er) I got about half into a extra large (by what i've seen usualy) spa bubble jet thing. Twas awsome .
When i was young i teid many things... hand, swimming pool jet (that was the best i remember), douche bag with lube (just the right size, and rubber too!), bottles (only once), Banana peel (works well), and of course.. my most recent addition .. the wife (By far my favorite)..

but i guess my experiemtal days are over (or are they just starting .. the wife and i are fairly creative).

hehe
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Old 07-06-2005, 07:45 PM   #94 (permalink)
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OMG.

i thought you were all exagerating...

that guts story is horrid...

i feel kinda sick now...

i might go throw up...
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Old 07-10-2005, 01:30 AM   #95 (permalink)
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Remember the pillow dolls that were wrestlers? They had Ultimate Warrior and Macho Man Randy Savage. I had a Hulk Hogan pillow doll and I cut a hole between the legs and made love. All positions too! I wasn't fantasizing about Hogan! I was thinking about my history teacher. I was thirteen and it lasted for about a month or so because I ruined it. It had a voice chip in it so when you wrestled it or twist the arms it would say something like "Ooooh, your breaking my arm!" I remember plugging away at it and hearing, "Ahhhh, pile driver!"


I feel a great weight has just been lifted off my chest!
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Old 07-10-2005, 05:50 PM   #96 (permalink)
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Sorry, but I don't buy the Guts story. Pool pumps are 400 PSI, isn't that what he said? Bullshit. If people died from them every year, there is no way they would be on the market. It would also be very difficult to get a seal around your asscrack as it's not nearly the same size nor flatness. A seal would never happen, and if it did, it would be easy to break.
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Old 07-10-2005, 08:27 PM   #97 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cedak
Sorry, but I don't buy the Guts story. Pool pumps are 400 PSI, isn't that what he said? Bullshit. If people died from them every year, there is no way they would be on the market. It would also be very difficult to get a seal around your asscrack as it's not nearly the same size nor flatness. A seal would never happen, and if it did, it would be easy to break.
There's really no need to debunk a story when there's no attempt made to claim it's true. I'm surprised that people had to ask, although maybe they just don't know who Palahniuk is (in which case they're very deprived.)
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Old 07-11-2005, 11:09 AM   #98 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by IC3
Here's a little rule i go by "Don't put your dick where you wouldn't put your hands"
Now there's sound advice!

This thread rocks.
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Old 07-11-2005, 01:59 PM   #99 (permalink)
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I have used couch cushions and between mattresses, also a folded pillow. Bought a latex vagina thing once was okay.
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Old 07-11-2005, 05:16 PM   #100 (permalink)
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Pillow and once stuck it in the opening of a humidifier, got real wet, but that was about it
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Old 07-14-2005, 02:59 PM   #101 (permalink)
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First off, the flies in the bathtub was freakin' weird.

I've been reaaaally experimental through the years since I figured out how things worked. Tried quite a few things mentioned already- water jets on pools, couch cushions (that rubbed off too much, got a scab, ouch!).

A couple of the best things I experimented with though:

1) Some of that packing foam wrap that's thin and smooth, rolled up in a sock then put on a plastic bottle, lubed up and had fun...

2) The newer foam that's used for hot water / AC pipe insulation. Really soft neoprene-like texture. Cut to length, duct tape the length of the split, wrap around the base a couple times for extra tightness. Nice.

Like so many also said, wife's vagina still better than even the best 'strange thing'.
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Old 07-14-2005, 03:45 PM   #102 (permalink)
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I don't know how strange it is, but it's nice to stick my cock in a pussy that's been well used, and is still soaked with cum. That's fun, really. I like to inject a little of me in to her.
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Old 07-14-2005, 07:40 PM   #103 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Wise
^ Just for shits n giggles last time I was at the grocery store I looked at all the banana's. Not a one of them looked big enough for me to actually fit my dick in it without it peeling open even if I wanted to. I don't see how guys can do that.

Asta!!
they are bigger then a banana and if i remember my produce correctly they are that good eaten like regular bananas...or maybe it was that its only for baking and such things as this
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Old 07-15-2005, 04:32 AM   #104 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DEI37
I don't know how strange it is, but it's nice to stick my cock in a pussy that's been well used, and is still soaked with cum. That's fun, really. I like to inject a little of me in to her.
Do you mean your own, or someone else's ?
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Old 07-15-2005, 04:55 AM   #105 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gh0ti
IIRC Playboy had a message in the forums ~ a year back about someone using a hollowed banana wrapped in tape and stuck in the microwave for a few seconds. That sounds like it might work out ok....
I'll admit to trying this one I was very bored at the time and read it somewhere on the net.. however it didn't really work all that great because it (the banana peel) was a bit small.

After that experience i've never really tried anything with any other strange objects
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Old 07-15-2005, 05:56 AM   #106 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Daniel_
Do you mean your own, or someone else's ?
Same thing i'd like to know..
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Old 07-18-2005, 12:02 PM   #107 (permalink)
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Doesn't matter does it? Sloppy seconds are alright in my book. Or thirds, fourths, fifths...whichever number she's serving at the time!
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Old 07-18-2005, 08:24 PM   #108 (permalink)
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Couch cussions, my hand, stuffed animal..
Shampoo bottle and a toilett paper roll.

I think that's about it.
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Old 07-18-2005, 09:37 PM   #109 (permalink)
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I remember when I was like 11 I had a big stuffed panda with a hole on the seem between the leg and the torso. Stuck it in and pumped away.
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Old 07-18-2005, 11:37 PM   #110 (permalink)
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There's really no need to debunk a story when there's no attempt made to claim it's true.
Well there you have it, then.
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Old 07-23-2005, 09:51 PM   #111 (permalink)
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Oh my god...that story is going to give me nightmares...
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Old 07-24-2005, 03:26 PM   #112 (permalink)
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Quote:
I am at work and honestly I think I am gonna throw up. I am turning all red and sweating trying not to.
I'm sweating bullets right now trying not to think about it at all...until I show my girlfriend.

Strangest things you've put your cock into eh...should be titled "Strangest things you HAVEN'T put your cock into", the list would be a lot shorter anyway.
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Old 07-26-2005, 10:00 AM   #113 (permalink)
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take a face cloth put it into warm water, and fold it into a pocket......than put it in between your couch cushions or matress / boxspring....give her a whirl....

haha
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Old 07-26-2005, 12:16 PM   #114 (permalink)
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Old 07-26-2005, 01:07 PM   #115 (permalink)
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When I was about 10 or 11 and just discovering how to pleasure myself I used to put it into the top end of a hot water bottle. the bit where the plug goes. the hwb would go at the foot of a pillow which would be my female substitute. I used to bring myself off this way until I discovered how to pull myself in the traditional way at about the age of 14 (to Donna Summer actually). Hang on I feel a new thread coming on.....first wank subject.
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Old 07-27-2005, 07:58 PM   #116 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IC3
Hand.

Here's a little rule i go by "Don't put your dick where you wouldn't put your hands"

I read a post earlier in the thread about toilet paper rolls, And i have a vague memory of me trying that as a kid..It was only that one time, I figured..If i try to fuck this, It's gonna probably take some skin off.

I second this one.... seems like a great rule to live by if you want the thing to still be useful when you come around to an actualy HUMAN BEING you want to bang.
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Old 07-28-2005, 10:21 AM   #117 (permalink)
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the best orgasm i had was putting it in festered that was the best fucking feeling ive ever had what i wouldnt do to have that festered rapped around my cock again.
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Old 07-28-2005, 10:31 AM   #118 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bobillydylan
the best orgasm i had was putting it in festered that was the best fucking feeling ive ever had what i wouldnt do to have that festered rapped around my cock again.
'Festered'? Are you sure about that word?
(eww...)
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Old 07-28-2005, 10:34 AM   #119 (permalink)
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I was thinking the same thing and two images came to mind

a) a very large infected boil
b) uncle fester

Either one is kind of.... eeeewwww
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Old 07-28-2005, 05:33 PM   #120 (permalink)
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