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Old 12-18-2005, 06:54 PM   #1 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Regina, sk, Canada
Talk about Messed up Relatioships!!!

Alright, so I spent 3 years, 3 months in one relationship that ended when she returned to work and decided to start dating my friend and dump me after they started dating. Make matters worse, we had had a child together. However that is something dealt wiht and not an issue in my life anymore.

2 weeks after that, The rebound relationship. That lasted all of a month. Then there were several random girls that I was dating on an open relationship basis. Once again not the messed up part.

Currently I have been seing this girl for 5 weeks now. It's not an open relationship, and we both like eachother. Things are pretty good between us, we have great trust, communication and respect for eachother. What's messed up with that, nothing...the part that is messed up, and i am sorry for dragging htis out and dangling the fish line, but when we started dating she was 7 weeks pregnant. Really doesn't bother me, cause I have a kid, I have gone through that, and I am seeing her cause of who she is. Well, 2 weeks into the relationship I had gone up to Calgary to visit my sister. She was going up to go see Lisa Lashes. Well she went up with the Father of the child. She needed to tell him, and talk with him to see if he was going to be involved as the father. She didn't tell him about us though, so when we all hooked up, it was walking on eggshells. Well, it accidentally slipped out when I was tlaking with the guy, and she got aangry with me, and all hell broke lose. After getting back into the city though, things got worked out, she apologised for putting me in that situation, and such.

So now, at this point, things are going good, except that she is going ot be most likely moving 3 hours away in a few months and living wiht hte father of the child. Now, I don't know about you, but it's messed up. Anyways, where the hell does that leave everything? The scary part of this all is we are continuing to see eachother, even though we both know it's doomed, and saying, alot can happen in 4 months. Well, aside from holding onto a sliver, this really has disaster written all over it, and no matter what there will be at least one person that gets hurt.

I know what should be done, and that it should be ended now before it gets to involved, but I just don't want to. I am finiding myself willing to go through pain if I have to for this girl. Am I wrong for wanting this?
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Old 12-18-2005, 06:57 PM   #2 (permalink)
Insane
 
Location: California
Your not wrong for wanting this; however you said you know whats best. Dont let yourself get hurt again, it just isn't worth it. Think about the future and just keep moving on, its hard, but it'll all work out
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Old 12-18-2005, 10:58 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
So now, at this point, things are going good, except that she is going ot be most likely moving 3 hours away in a few months and living wiht hte father of the child
So... the woman you're with is going to be living a long assed way away with the man who seeded her womb.

Take a deep breath, tell her thanks for the fun but there's no way it'll work. Cause it WON'T. Why the crap is she living with this guy? Girls just don't live with the guys they've slept with and are having a child with unless they're HAVING SEX WITH THEM.

How many nights of you lying in bed imagining what they're doing will it take before you get insanely jealous, drive over there in the middle of the night, and start to raise cain? Not many.
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Old 12-18-2005, 11:28 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Location: Kansas City, yo.
If she wanted a relationship with you, she wouldn't be moving in with the father of her child. Period.

Run, don't walk, away.
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Old 12-19-2005, 12:15 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sage
So... the woman you're with is going to be living a long assed way away with the man who seeded her womb.

Take a deep breath, tell her thanks for the fun but there's no way it'll work. Cause it WON'T. Why the crap is she living with this guy? Girls just don't live with the guys they've slept with and are having a child with unless they're HAVING SEX WITH THEM.

How many nights of you lying in bed imagining what they're doing will it take before you get insanely jealous, drive over there in the middle of the night, and start to raise cain? Not many.
All I have to add to this is ummm hello?

She is moving, to live with him. You don't really have a relationship. This sounds more like the stuff of Jerry Springer than reality here..
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Old 12-19-2005, 12:39 AM   #6 (permalink)
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You know what you need to do, I think you just need a little encouragement. You're getting it Seriously, if she's moving in with this guy there is NO WAY that this will work out. If she's not still involved with him in some way, she is at least simply "messed up." It's not worth it. You're not wrong for not wanting to do it, but you need to force yourself to do what you know is best.
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Old 12-19-2005, 08:23 AM   #7 (permalink)
Still Free
 
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Location: comfortably perched at the top of the bell curve!
The previous comments almost sum up my feelings. Except for one thing:

CONDOMS
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Old 12-19-2005, 08:28 AM   #8 (permalink)
Insane
 
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Location: Hawaii
Umm yeah, totally agreeing with everyone who's saying, "She's living with another man!!!" If that doesn't end it for you, I'm not sure nothing will. Sorry boss, this is doomed for failure and heartache. Don't be a glutton for punishment.
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Old 01-07-2006, 07:17 AM   #9 (permalink)
Crazy
 
Location: Regina, sk, Canada
So I had planned on doing a break up with her. I was fianlly going to do it last night. Well, I backed down. I had good reason for it though. We were supposed to hook up when I was done work...but for some reason I wasn't able to get ahold of her after work. 3 hours later I still coudlnt...and I was pretty pissed at her. Well she calls me, she's in the hospital...so now I feel like a fool. I goto the hospital ER where hs e is...and it turns out that she had a miscarriage...which was the whole reason why she was going to be leaving in a few months to live with the other guy....but now...that's not gonna happen. This makes an actual relationship seem possible now.

so I have a crossroads again.

a) I could follow through with breaking up with her, at this moment in her life, and let her know that I do like her, but that we should just be friends.

or

b) Continue on and see where things lead.

Obviously she has her issues and is gonna need space, but at the same time I think it would be cruel to break up with her at this juncture...especially since my whole reasoning for doing so doesn't exist anymore.
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Old 01-07-2006, 07:38 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Location: L.A. L.A. land
Umm, your reason for breaking up wasn't the baby, it was the fact that she was (and maybe still is) going to live with another man. Dude.

But just give her some time to deal, this will be a very hard point in her life.
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