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Old 04-30-2008, 09:05 AM   #1 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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What would you do if you were... Steve Jobs?

(bear with me, it's a new idea for a thread series)

Let's say that you're basically a demigod at Apple, and your wish is the company's demand. You want the brand and company to succeed. What would you do in your position to fix problems that you see at Apple? Would you make the computers cheaper? Would you change the form factor? Would you develop more towers? Or would you head in the other direction, making them perform better and making them more elite? Would you make a 3g iPhone?

I'll start.
- First off, I'd probably take a long, hard look at the Mac Mini. It's been around for a bit, and it's been the same shape for years now. This is supposed to be the VW Beetle of computers, after all. I'd like to change the colors a bit to reflect the new lineup by changing the white top to matte black. I'd also like to add better performance.
Baseline: 2.2GHz Core 2 Duo, 1.5GB memory, 120GB HD for $399
Better: 2.4GHz Core 2 Duo, 2GB memory, 320GB HD for $499
Not only that, but I'd want to finally provide a cheaper display that can be sold with the computer. I could simply repackage a Samsung in aluminum with an iSight integrated.

While I realize that I'd probably not make much money on these, it'd be good to establish a larger market presence and then simply adjust the prices accordingly once market share jumped (as it would).

- Second, I'd revisit the MacBook. No more black and white models, we've moved on to aluminum and it makes more sense. I'd rather it simply looked like a 13" MBP. I'd also like to add more education software, like FREE iWork (Pages, Numbers, and Keynote). I'd also bundle a case. The idea is to make this even more perfect for college students and young professionals who need a decent computer. I'd probably drop the prices $100 each, too.

- Third: MBP! This is Mac's God-computer. I'd upgrade the processors to 2.8 and 3.066GHz and make 3GB of memory the norm. I'd also throw GeForce 8800 GTSs in each of them and expand the possible HD to 500GB. I'd keep prices the same.

- Fourth, I'd probably change the commercials. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy them, but it fuels the raging fire of people who aren't fans of Macs. That's bad business. What I might do is open up emails from people who hate apple and directly answer their questions in commercials, honestly. Mac-hate is a big problem, and it should be overcome.



Okay, you're turn. BTW, don't just say "I'd quit and retire" or "I'd blow up the building". This is you actually in Steve Jobs' shoes.
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Old 04-30-2008, 11:59 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I'd design a sleek, molded plastic, brushed aluminum cubicle with a waste high glory hole and have one installed for me to stand in at every mac store in the world. That way, no matter where I was I could interact on a personal level with the hip young artists who use my products.
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:04 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I'd quit.

Oh, you added a rule that I can't say that.

I'd retire?

I think Steve Jobs and his company can go expletive deleted themselves.
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:07 PM   #4 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JinnKai
I'd quit.

Oh, you added a rule that I can't say that.

I'd retire?

I think Steve Jobs and his company can go expletive deleted themselves.
Thanks for exemplifying what I asked people not to do.
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:15 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I suppose it wasn't directly his decision, but I had nothing against Mac until they started releasing their ignorant, lie-filled idiot-pandering monkey-fucking commercials.

I hope their whole product line goes to hell...
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:30 PM   #6 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JinnKai
I suppose it wasn't directly his decision, but I had nothing against Mac until they started releasing their ignorant, lie-filled idiot-pandering monkey-fucking commercials.

I hope their whole product line goes to hell...
Translation:
Quote:
If I were Steve Jobs, I'd probably stop making the "Hi, I'm a Mac" commercials.
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:44 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Yea actually, you're right.

Oh and I'd also make a public apology for allowing that idiocy to be broadcast, in hopes of fostering more interest in the company.
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:45 PM   #8 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JinnKai
Yea actually, you're right.
Uh, oh... this is going in my signature!

Kidding. But seriously, why not just put this in the first place. Or hit the back button?
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Old 04-30-2008, 12:45 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JinnKai
I suppose it wasn't directly his decision, but I had nothing against Mac until they started releasing their ignorant, lie-filled idiot-pandering monkey-fucking commercials.

I hope their whole product line goes to hell...
surely you are not so weak as to be THAT influenced by any commercial.
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Old 04-30-2008, 01:39 PM   #10 (permalink)
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I am not, but most people don't know a computer from a hole in their ass, nonetheless the fact that a Mac is a "PC" too.
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Old 04-30-2008, 01:45 PM   #11 (permalink)
... a sort of licensed troubleshooter.
 
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Holy shit it took 2 posts and a matter of hours for this to turn into an "I hate macs" thread. Can we grow up, please?
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Old 04-30-2008, 01:54 PM   #12 (permalink)
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OK, we're going to try this again in another thread. This one is too far off the rails. Can we at least pay lip service to the idea staying on topic? And yes, I realize the irony that I'm the one saying that.

Will, I look forward to the new version of this.
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