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Escort for 25th Birthday?

Discussion in 'Tilted Life and Sexuality' started by amire, Aug 27, 2011.

  1. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    To me this seems rather odd. (And I myself was a 24-year-old virgin.)

    If you want to do this for the sexual experience, I suppose you could look out for a "Show Me the Ropes" package with an escort. Otherwise, if it's just a straight-ahead dealio, then all it might teach you is how to pick low-hanging and very expensive fruit—or fruit that has already fallen from the tree, depending on where you go.

    If I were in your shoes, I'd sooner go for one of those dating sites.

    Using an escort for your first time will set a rather odd bar to which you will compare your future experiences.

    It might make things even more awkward.

    Escorts are paid to please. How do you think that compares to most women in regular relationships?
     
  2. ralphie250

    ralphie250 Fully Erect Donor

    Location:
    At work..
    as i am from south of atlanta, there are plenty of places to go for the social life. where about do you live? i might can help you a little more that way.
    personally if you want to get an escort, then thats your business. i wont knock you for it and you shouldnt care if anyone else does. what you do with your time and money is your business. just remember BE CAREFUL for all the obvious reasons
     
  3. Seer666

    Seer666 Getting Tilted

    Poetry and Plan9, you have made this thread explode into awesome. This has been some of the funnest reading I've done in a while.

    amire, if you decide you don't want to do the escort thing, I'm going to give you a trick that is almost guaranteed to get a chick to put out in a hurry. From now on, whenever you go to an ATM, look for the receipts people always leave behind. Find one with a fairly high balance on it and stick it in your wallet. Then the next time you go to a club and see a chick you want to bang, go over and talk to her. As long as it doesn't turn into a total cluster fuck of failure on the initial meet, tell her you woul like to give her your number and take her out for dinner sometime. Write your number on the back of the receipt you grabbed. She will not be able to help but look at the front. If the number on it is a good one, she will cacll you back be be blowing you within a week. Quick easy way to get laid .
     
    • Like Like x 2
  4. Plan9

    Plan9 Rock 'n Roll

    Location:
    Earth
    Seer666,

    Your advice to Amire wounds me deeply.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  5. Seer666

    Seer666 Getting Tilted

    Probably, but it was given to me by one of my good friends girlfriends back when I was younger man. Experimentation with said said advice proved to work. When a woman gives me advice that works so well, I feel no quilt about passing it on.
     
  6. KirStang

    KirStang Something Patriotic.

    Lies. All Lies. That's what they tell you to getcha in to Law School...
     
    • Like Like x 1
  7. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    -Poets/Novelists: are shit broke, get women.

    Woman are easy. You just have to know how to appear to give them what they think they want.
     
  8. Doris

    Doris Getting Tilted

    You're so correct. I'm not a feminist, and I admit I can be fooled to bargain of what I thought are my standards.

    Successful men possess cockiness, something devoted mothers can't teach.

    I can make real life comparison with hubby and his brother, who happens to be an engineer - studied many years until getting a job, married a lot later. My hubby's technician, smart enough, but too impatient to take the route to become engineer, more of an actionman type.*** It's definitely in the career choice as well.

    *** He's currently lying on the sofa, tired after work , not really living up to this image I'm painting. :D Probably dreaming of escort service. :rolleyes:
     
  9. I dont think you need to worry about your boys dating Doris - you seem a sensible mum, willing to look at both sides - probably with a giggle - and give reasoned advice.
    Baraka - the appear to give them what they like bit is a girly ploy too. I exasperated friends who would say 'couldnt you just pretend he was interesting'. I find a good mind attractive myself - bonking is such a small part of life isnt it. Waking up with someone you enjoy conversing with seems far more - genteel? attractive? interesting?
     
  10. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    I should point out that I was being facetious. I don't find dealing with women very easy. I don't know how to deal with the one I have.

    /socially-inept
     
  11. Jove

    Jove Slightly Tilted

    Location:
    Michigan
    Go for it. The worst thing that will happen is you're out a ton of cash for 30 seconds of pleasure.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  12. Strange Famous

    Strange Famous it depends on who is looking...

    Location:
    Ipswich, UK
    30 seconds?

    To guard against that, have a wank 30 minutes before sex, then you'll last a lot longer.

    Or just as you are about to bust, imagine a conga eel biting off your cock, that will also keep you going a lot longer.
     
  13. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    Or you could just slow the fuck down.

    Literally.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  14. Strange Famous

    Strange Famous it depends on who is looking...

    Location:
    Ipswich, UK
    When your at the point of no return, just slowing down wont be enough for the man.

    He might start off trying to go nice and slow, but then the excitement takes over.
     
  15. the_jazz

    the_jazz Accused old lady puncher

    Most escorts bill by the hour. So that leaves the options for multiple rounds, if you're up to it.
     
  16. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    Mind over matter. Of course, if it's one's first time.....
     
  17. Strange Famous

    Strange Famous it depends on who is looking...

    Location:
    Ipswich, UK
    Well, I aint an expert, but I think it depends.

    If you pick up a girl on the street and pay bottom price, your paying to go somewhere quiet and have it off then and there up against the wall of an abandoned bingo hall with someone who is either too young or too old.

    Then if you want to pay a nice price, you can pay someone who'll be quite good looking, stay the night, eat dinner with you and even talk and chat and pretend she likes you as well as sex.

    Then you can pay top dollar and have a woman dressed in tight black leather hit your arse with a table tennis bat and call you a useless bastard.
     
  18. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member

    Location:
    Toronto
    You forgot the diapers and the paraphilic infantilism. You're paying top dollar, right?
     
  19. partialfractions

    partialfractions New Member

    Amire, as a fellow man of science I feel the need to point out some advice. All your schooling and a likely pensive and arduous journey to adulthood has prepared you for this. You don't need to buy an escort; you can build one.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  20. MeltedMetalGlob

    MeltedMetalGlob Resident Loser Donor

    Location:
    Who cares, really?
    • Like Like x 1