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Helicopter Parents

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by warrrreagl, Apr 29, 2013.

  1. warrrreagl

    warrrreagl Slightly Tilted

    Location:
    Land of cotton.
    I have decided that the greatest threat to our way of life has nothing to do with guns, drugs, violent crime, promiscuous television, or flagging moral fiber. It's those damned helicopter parents that are killing us.

    I just advised a promising young college freshman and helped register her for summer classes here on campus. Every single, solitary discussion we had about classes was followed up by a quick cellphone call to her mother to check and see if that was okay. And her stupid stupid stupid mother was WRONG about almost everything she said. She undermined all of my advising expertise, and I placed that poor child in a schedule of summer classes that she will hate and regret horribly, and there's not a damn thing I can do about it. It's her dime.

    These are a few of the gems that came from her mother:
    MOM: Don't take General Psychology, because it's worthless. Since you're going to be an Elementary Education major, take Developmental Psychology instead. That's more useful.
    FACT: General Psychology is a PRE-REQUISITE for Developmental Psychology, and you must take it FIRST. (The girl desperately needed General Psychology to count as one of her core Behavioral Science electives. But the dumbass mother advised her not to take General Psychology because she didn't see any use for it.)

    MOM: Economics is a "filler" course, and doesn't count towards your degree.
    FACT: Economics (both Microeconomics and Macroeconomics) count as core Behavioral Science electives, and are guaranteed to transfer EVERYWHERE in the Western world.

    MOM: College Orientation is also a filler course, and only exists to make money for the college.
    FACT: EVERY FUCKING CLASS WE TEACH exists to make money for the college. We just make sure we teach the ones that will transfer as part of a degree plan. Plus, you can't get a degree from us unless you've taken College Orientation. Plus plus plus, College Orientation would teach you how to tell your dumbass mother to go fuck herself, because you will understand your degree plan a HELL OF A LOT better than she does.

    MOM: Once you've had your two required English Composition courses, you don't need to take a worthless Literature course.
    FACT: Literature is a REQUIRED core Humanities and Fine Arts course, and every college and university in all of Western culture requires AT LEAST ONE Literature course.

    MOM: Don't take Music Appreciation at the community college, because it won't transfer to a real university.
    FACT: Are you out of your fucking mind?!? You think a university will accept our English, Math, and Science transfer credit, but NOT Music Appreciation?!?! What the fuck, bitch?

    When this child finally transfers to a 4-year institution, her transcripts are going to be a shitting hemorrhage of a mess, for which her mother will probably blame US.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  2. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Toronto
    Holy. fucking. shit.

    I do not envy you, bro.

    Helicopter parents. They give me the heebie jeebies.

    I mean...what causes it? Does it lock in if you breastfeed your kid until age five or something?

    I feel really sorry for those kids. I'm not sure how legit this study is, but it wouldn't surprise me if there is an obvious connection: Why helicopter kids aren’t happy - The Globe and Mail
     
  3. Random McRandom

    Random McRandom Starry Eyed

    Annoying to say the least.

    The worst part of that whole scenario is the confirmation that most people are completely ignorant when it comes to psychology and the various "courses" involved with it. I mean, of course you don't *need* a pre-requisite before taking focused courses. :rolleyes:

    I do not envy you.
     
  4. Craven Morehead

    Craven Morehead Very Tilted Donor

    Over protective parents in general are a PITA. Geez, at some point their children have to learn to live on their own. Quit obsessing about every little detail of their life.

    Then there are the opposite to helicopter parents, those that aren't involved in any aspect of their child's life. Probably worse than helicopter parents. Not probably, they are much worse.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  5. Random McRandom

    Random McRandom Starry Eyed

    QFT.
     
  6. rogue49

    rogue49 Tech Kung Fu Artist Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Baltimore/DC
    So basically, people who have a strong opinion about EVERYTHING...who happen to be parents.

    Yes, my ex-mother-in-law was like this. Drove me crazy.
     
  7. Fangirl

    Fangirl Very Tilted

    Location:
    Arizona
    Helicopter parents tend to be people with the time and money to lavish on their precious ones.
    I don't think they are in the majority but they are so effing irritating they stand out more.
    Also, it's not like helicopter parenting takes place in a vacuum. Once the kid is over say age 12 or 13 they don't have to be mindless automatons.
    I really don't feel sorry for the girl. She's a young adult. Time to grow up.
    I do not envy however anyone doing academic advising with a kid still tethered to her mother.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  8. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Toronto
    My upbringing was in the "opposite" camp.

    I don't think my parents even knew what I was studying until I invited them to the convocation. I'm surprised they actually came, especially since it was out of town.

    These days, I have to remind them what I do for a living. "Something with books, right?"
     
  9. cynthetiq

    cynthetiq Administrator Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    New York City
    Precious snowflake syndrome.

    Thank god I never employed one of those let all alone interviewed one. I'm very much a manager who will test their employees to saw just how much stress load they can take.

    I would have put that person in their place is they called me to follow up in any manner.

    I'm all for playing the game of politics and networking but that isn't networking.
     
  10. Joniemack

    Joniemack Beta brainwaves in session Donor

    Location:
    Reading, UK
    I fully agree with everything said here.

    It doesn't help that the FAFSA program refuses to recognize students as independent adults until they are over 24 or 25 years old. I imagine this gives some parents the idea that they are responsible for their kids while they are at college or university. Made worse, I suppose, when parents are paying for their children's higher education out of their own pockets.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  11. cynthetiq

    cynthetiq Administrator Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    New York City
    What the hell is a convocation? Is that the oath of Omertà, the editor code of silence?
     
  12. snowy

    snowy so kawaii Staff Member Donor

    Ugh. I've got a set. What drives me nuts about these particular parents is that as "concerned" as they are about their son, they are completely unwilling to do the thing that he actually needs. If it's obvious to me that their careers come first, I can only assume how he feels about it. They push, push, push him, and in the process, they are pushing him away.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  13. I think a convocation is what they call graduation up in the Northlands.

    I am saving my helicopter for my escape plan or fiery demise.
     
    • Like Like x 3
  14. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Toronto
    I can't say. Sorry.
     
  15. Joniemack

    Joniemack Beta brainwaves in session Donor

    Location:
    Reading, UK
    And possibly pushing him or her towards a specific degree and ultimate career they would not have chosen for themselves. Makes for unhappy and unfulfilled human beings.
     
  16. martian

    martian Server Monkey Staff Member

    Location:
    Mars
    Turns out Baraka_Guru is a warlock.
     
    • Like Like x 4
  17. Baraka_Guru

    Baraka_Guru Möderätor Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Toronto
    I've got mad skills. My magic makes the ladies' legs shake.

    I have a pretty bitchin' staff too.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  18. G~Man

    G~Man New Member

    I am a helicopter parent---but not this kind....... lol

    As a side line.... I had a thought when my daughter was 4, that if I controlled ALL of her education, I could teach her to be the perfect helicopter pilot...raised from age 4. Luckily I was smart and left it as just a thought. She loves to fly with me to this day, but has no desire to follow in my footsteps thankfully.
     
    • Like Like x 1
  19. warrrreagl

    warrrreagl Slightly Tilted

    Location:
    Land of cotton.
    Last night, I was telling Grancey about this story, and I remembered something cool I forgot to include in my OP. The girl is planning to transfer to my alma mater in order to major in elementary education, and I have three education degrees (bachelor's, master's, and PhD) from there. Her mother is currently a music major at that same university, from where I also received my first bachelor's degree in music theory & composition. All four of my degrees are hanging on the wall in my office, along with all three of my teacher's certificates from three different states. During one of the cellphone calls, I could hear her mother's voice say, "He just doesn't know how competitive the College of Education is over here." I caught the girl's eye, and simply pointed at my wall. As her mother's voice continued screeching, the girl's eyes wandered over the sheepskin, and she told her mother, "I think he knows." Later, during another call, I heard her mother say something about me not understanding the "intensity" of music courses, and the girl said, "Uh, he knows, he knows."
     
    • Like Like x 6
  20. greywolf

    greywolf Slightly Tilted

    I think of myself as a bit of a helicopter parent (doing too much for my kids - things I think they should do for themselves), but then I look at their friends who can't open a can of tuna, and would starve if they were on their own if there wasn't pizza delivery or a fast food joint in walking distance.

    When my niece was in university, living in a condo owned by her father, she called her mother one night to report a burnt out light bulb. Her mother was 4 hours away and said "Ok, I'll be right there!", rolled over, and went back to sleep. My niece actually called the next day to say never mind, she'd managed to replace it herself!

    My middle kid is in for one hell of a revelation this fall when I dump him at university in the middle of the Northern Ontario wilderness and say "See Ya!". I'm expecting a changed kid if he survives until Christmas, lol.