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How did you learn about sex?

Discussion in 'Tilted Life and Sexuality' started by Lindy, Jul 9, 2018.

  1. Lindy

    Lindy Very Tilted Donor

    Location:
    Nebraska
    How did you learn about sex? I don’t mean “the birds and the bees,” and I don’t mean how to practice “safe sex” or about birth control, or “how to pick up girls.”

    I’m asking about the mechanics, the nuts (sorry) and bolts of sex.
    How did you learn about how to suck cock? Or eat pussy? Or other non-PIV sexual activities?
    How did you learn to explore new positions?
    Guys, how did you learn endurance, and to avoid premature ejaculation?
    How did you learn about your less commonplace erogenous zones? I mean, those areas other than between your legs.
    How did you learn to please your partner? Or, to please yourself?
    How did you choose your longer term sex partners? Or did you let them choose you?
    How did you come to terms with your proclivities that might be considered a little kinky or off plumb?


    Did you learn from books? I mean like Sex Positions Illustrated, Kama Sutra, or The Joy of Sex.
    Did you get knowledge from friends? Relatives? (My cousin Christine was a wealth of info.)
    Did you learn from online porn, either videos or written?
    Did you have a partner or lover that was your sex teacher or mentor?


    Or did you just muddle on through?


    I had a mentor.
    Not a relationship mentor. Or a life mentor. A sex mentor.
    I didn’t realize it at the time, but that’s what he was.

    He died a couple of months ago in our hometown, and I just found out last week. It hit me much harder than I ever would have dreamed. I’m still dealing with the shock and the loss. I’ll probably have more to say, here and probably other threads as well.
     
    Lindy, Jul 9, 2018
    #1
  2. fflowley

    fflowley Don't just do something, stand there! Donor

    Teach I think I was out sick that day!
    Is there a make up class.

    More to say later.........
     
    fflowley, Jul 9, 2018
    #2
    • Like Like x 1
  3. Lordeden

    Lordeden Part of the Problem Donor

    Location:
    Redneckhell, NC
    Steven King's "IT" and "The Tommyknockers". It had the orgy in the sewers between a bunch of virgins and Tommyknockers straight up explained the mechanics of sex in a conversation between two characters.

    Between those things, my 10 year old self learned about sex beyond "Two adults do it and it involves naughty bits".
     
    Lordeden, Jul 9, 2018
    #3
    • Like Like x 1
  4. DAKA

    DAKA Bent out of shape Donor

    Location:
    Fort Lauderdale
    Well, one summer ...at BAND CAMP
     
    DAKA, Jul 9, 2018
    #4
    • Like Like x 1
  5. martian

    martian Server Monkey Staff Member

    Location:
    Mars
    Is there any way to learn other than by doing? I sat through sex ed class in school like every other adolescent boy and girl, and giggled uncomfortably while my gym coach/health teacher did his best to remain stoic and professional in his descriptions of male and female anatomy and how those things interact. But all the fun stuff, that I learned by playing and experimenting and being played with and experimented on. I don't really credit one specific woman with educating me. There were several, and each of them had something new to teach.
     
    martian, Jul 9, 2018
    #5
    • Like Like x 1
  6. ASU2003

    ASU2003 Very Tilted

    Location:
    Where ever I roam
    I had to look it up at the library and piece things together. Sex Ed in school was better than some places, but not the OMGYes.com type of graphic detail that young me would have liked. I remember the main question I had was how the vulva opened up. Were the muscles down there tough to spread?

    I did have access to the Internet in 1995, and there were a few pictures on-line back then. The audio from Real Sex on scrambled HBO and the Red Shoe Diaries on Showtime were always good.

    [​IMG]
     
    ASU2003, Jul 12, 2018
    #6
    • Winner Winner x 1
  7. Lindy

    Lindy Very Tilted Donor

    Location:
    Nebraska
    I remember dialup and AOL.
     
    Lindy, Jul 12, 2018
    #7
  8. DAKA

    DAKA Bent out of shape Donor

    Location:
    Fort Lauderdale
    We had a WEB TV....holy shit....a whole trip to Europe done with that......
     
    DAKA, Jul 12, 2018
    #8
  9. buzzgunner

    buzzgunner 180 gr. of diplomacy

    Location:
    Oregon, USA
    When I was growing up, my younger sister and I used to "play doctor"... a LOT! (Believe it or not, each "session" was more than likely her idea than mine. She just LOVED having me play around inside her with my fingers.)
     
    buzzgunner, Jul 13, 2018
    #9
  10. rogue49

    rogue49 Tech Kung Fu Artist Staff Member Donor

    Location:
    Baltimore/DC
    My mother is a labor & delivery nurse.
    She's always told me from the beginning...
    I remember her using a book initially...something with "soft pictures" and comics.
    Then just kept repeating it as I slowly absorbed it.

    Her philosophy was to be factual about the particulars and focus on the values...caring, discretion, cleanness, prep, etc...

    I was a curious sort anyway...playing doctor for the first time around 5 or 6.
    I was always aware of girls.
    Playing doctor again aroud 9 or 10
    And definitely flipping through many a magazine when I could get my hands on it.

    Playboy was most prevalent.
    Penthouse and Hustler came later...then doing what I could to get my hands on the variety of pictorials that came out.
    Helped me and my cuz finding my uncle's collection of old-school x-rated mags.

    And started masturbation with a passion in my early teens.

    My problem was even though I was very interested, fortunately not ugly and tall...my mouth got me nada. I was a dork.
    So no nookie for me until I was 18

    Every once in a blue moon...a woman would ignore my awkwardness and obliviousness...and allow me to try my hand, so to speak.

    But I don't think I really started knowing about sex and have some skill and ability with it until my early 20's

    I think learning about sex goes beyond the basics.
    People should also learn about how to give and get pleasure.
    How to listen...adjust, invest.
    And my mother wasn't wrong about the values...they're needed too. (just because you're doing it raw...doesn't mean you do it without consequences or indiscretion)

    If only more people had the ability to practice. (practice, practice, practice...tweak, consider, tweak, consider, etc...and more practice)
    Try out different techniques.
    Without any skewing of the info or comfort that peers, priests, parents and porn makes one feel. (not that I'm anti porn at all...it has it's place...but you can go overboard too)

    We're getting better...but we've got a long ways to go still
     
    rogue49, Jul 16, 2018 at 10:41 PM
    #10