Leaving when you want to go.

I know reactions to assisted suicide vary, but shouldnt the decision of when to go be up to the individual. Living wills were touched on in Mixed Medias blog, and then this was in the paperless paper today. Myself, I think one should have a right to choose for oneself. Silly laws that make failed suicides into law breakers, who could potentialy be sent to prison - I dont understand the logic.
What do the rest of you think? Should the individual have the right to decide?

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'Our mother's last supper': How hours after British gran posed for this photo with her grown-up children she ended her life at Dignitas suicide clinic and why they have no regrets

• Jackie Meacock suffered from dystonia - an incurable nerve condition
• Life had become unbearable - driving was impossible and even a shopping trip ended in her giving up in tears after half an hour
• The grandmother of nine paid £10,000 to end her life at the Swiss clinic

By EMILY ANDREWS
PUBLISHED: 00:00, 11 February 2013 | UPDATED: 08:02, 11 February 2013

• Comments (326)​
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Surrounded by her four grown-up children, Jackie Meacock poses for the sort of snapshot seen in countless family photo albums.
They had all just been out for dinner together and enjoyed an evening filled with laughter, jokes and treasured memories.
Yet hours after this picture was taken, Mrs Meacock, her children again by her side, ended her own life in a Dignitas clinic in Switzerland.


Our last night: Jackie Meacock (second from right) with her children (from left) Caron, David, Donella and Nina
The constant pain of dystonia, an incurable nerve condition, meant the 71-year-old grandmother felt life was no longer living.
Recalling their last evening together, her daughter Donella Trickey, 47, said her mother had enjoyed herself so much she had stayed up late and had seconds of her favourite pudding, crème brûlée.


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‘It was a lovely night – it was quite an informal meal as that is what we are like as a family, so there were no speeches or anything like that.
‘We all had cocktails, and we laughed and shared stories about ourselves.
‘We even played dare games and Mum was telling us stories. We wanted to keep the mood light.’
The next day, however, that fun-filled night seemed a lifetime ago.

Jackie Meacock (right) and her daughter Donella pose for a photo outside Dignitas​

Mrs Trickey, from Brighton, her sisters Caron Gill, 53, and Nina Sloper, 51, and their brother David Sloper, 44, accompanied their mother on the short journey from their hotel in Zurich to the Dignitas clinic on September 13 last year.
‘Mum held my hand so tightly,’ Mrs Trickey recalled.
‘Nobody said a word all the way to the clinic. We just sat in silence. There was part of me still thinking “this isn’t happening”. It was hard to come to terms with the fact we were going to leave her there.’
Her mother, however, was thinking of more immediate matters.
‘Mum went into practical mode,’ Mrs Trickey said. ‘She started taking all her rings off and gave them to us. She gave me her wedding ring.
‘She checked who was going to take her purse and who was going to take her shoes. It was difficult. Mum came with a bag full of stuff, and she wasn’t coming home.’
Mrs Meacock, a grandmother of nine and great-grandmother of six, paid £10,000 for an assisted suicide and cremation package at Dignitas.
She made the decision after her struggle to cope with her condition became too much and she tried unsuccessfully to take her own life.
That resulted in her being taken to hospital and sectioned as mentally ill. But her daughter insisted: ‘Mum didn’t have mental health issues. She wanted to die with dignity. And she got her final wish.’
Mrs Meacock’s family meant everything to her, and she’d tried to hide the pain for more than a decade.
‘She was very outgoing, very family-oriented and she worked all her life,’ her daughter said. She said her mother had been a security manager who spent 25 years ‘chasing shoplifters’.
At home she was ‘always there with lots of hugs’.
Despite her sunny nature, the agony of dystonia, which made her body twist and muscles go into spasm, left her life a misery.
‘It was relentless. She was exhausted with it. Her face was etched with pain. Over the last few years it got worse.


Happier times: Mrs Meacock with her daughters at Christmas in 1968. Her family meant everything to her and she'd tried to hid the pain for more than a decade
‘She couldn’t even watch TV. She had to sit in a certain direction because her head veered that way,’ Mrs Trickey said.
And when Mrs Meacock’s husband Tony died of leukaemia in 2011, her grief made her physical pain all the more difficult to bear. By the start of 2012 she was on daily painkillers, including liquid morphine. As the months progressed, she could do less and less.
Driving was impossible and even a shopping trip resulted in her giving up in tears after half an hour.
That was the trigger that convinced her she no longer had any quality of life and she tried to commit suicide in April last year.
When that attempt failed, Mrs Meacock was taken to hospital and sectioned as mentally ill.
Her family challenged the ruling and she was discharged from a secure unit after two weeks but remained terrified of being sent back to hospital.


Mrs Meacock paid £10,000 for an assisted suicide and cremation package at Dignitas (one building pictured)
When the opportunity to go to Dignitas came up, she decided the time was right.
Mrs Trickey described her mother’s last moments at the clinic. ‘We all went into the lovely gardens and took photos and had lots of hugs. And then Mum said: “I am ready now, I want to do this now”.
‘She had to drink this horrible liquid in one go.
‘It tasted disgusting so as soon as she knocked it back she asked for chocolate and drank some water.
‘And then she said, “I’m feeling really sleepy. I love you all”. Within two minutes she was asleep. It was exactly what she wanted.
‘Quick, peaceful and dignified. It wasn’t about us... it was all about Mum.
‘I am happy she is free of pain. Death is something we all face. For some people it’s about how long you can live, but for other people it isn’t.
‘They want quality of life, and without that quality, there is no life.’
​

ook

 

When one considers the amount of pain, suffering and expense that is typically involved with the later stages in life, this seems so logical. There are all kinds of issues that would have to be worked through, such as life insurance payments for one. I really hope to see this in my lifetime, but I doubt that I will. Of course, it would only be considered for those in possession of their faculties. If a disease spreads too far, that alone could render a person incapable of determining this with a clear mind.

 

I too wondered about insurance companies and if they would accept that if the individual had passed the medical assessment to allow them to die at their own time, they are not like someone say putting a hose from their car exhaust through the window, and drifting off to sleep - and leaving a mess behind for others to clear up. I think it sad that Dignitas told Sir Terry Pratchett that if he waits for his illness to affect his brain - which is when he would like to go - they probably wont be able to help him as it would be illegal. I should have thought it more sensible to be able to do like a living will in such instances.
Here we have elderly patients dying in hospitals - a recent case one old gal was drinking the flower vase water as it was all she had access to. People are left in their beds to starve to death, and that long horrible process is okay, but taking a needle of stuff like the vet does, and shoving it in an arm - that is not okay - obviously with it being the request of the patient and not to free a bed or whatever. Its seemingly okay to die or kill with neglect - but not with planned kindness.

 

Having seen my father in law deteriorate over a 6 month period due to prostate cancer that had spread throughout his body, I would whole heartedly support either of my parents given similar circumstances. My FIL spent nearly 3 weeks in hospice, by the end there was nothing left, literally. And virtually nothing left of us, we were spent. It is a terrible ordeal to go through. My MIL on the other hand suffered a stroke and that was all 'neat and tidy' becoming final in just a few days. Death with dignity would never apply in her situation.

 

My grandfather lasted three months longer than expected with cancer. When we last saw him, he held one hand with the other to lift his hands on top of the sheet because it took all his strength to do that. He most likely would not have asked for help to go gently into that good night because it would have been a sin as he was catholic.
My father was pts with morphine - but not when he had wanted it, not when he had had enough - a repeated stroke victim trapped in his own broken body. It was very hard for him to find words, and when he found them, got them out and asked to die - he was punished for it.
I have arranged for something to be delivered if/when my brain bleeds again - because at some point there will not be enough of me left for me to be me. I could choose not to have surgery, and that would mean about ten days of nasty infection intollerable pain and stuff - so I have my exit route planned. The dealer I spoke to was quite horrified when I asked, but then I explained and he understood, it is my life raft or escape pod. I may not need to use it, but its all lined up should I need to. Only worry is that I would be leaving my son on his own in the world, and his head is not in a good place as it is. Guilt of the fleeing parent I guess.

 

chinese crested I hope this doesn't happen for many many years, but if it does, I wish you all the best in it happening like you want.

 

How very touching Snowy. A dignified ending. When death comes gently as a lovers kiss - is that not a blessing.

 

I've now been on chemo for 9-10 weeks, and on Friday was put on a new chemo drug. One of its greatest side effects is general body pain, just all over, all the time. And there are no drugs to stop that pain, besides percocet, which I can't take cause I throw them up within an hour. So, I have to bear the pain, which lasts 3-5 days. I've been in bed since Friday, grunting and groaning. I'm not exaggerating when I say it was a slow torture. I've been through some high pain tolerance situations up to this point, especially thanks to this cancer, but this body pain really knocks me down. Currently, its less sharp and become more of a dull pain, so I'm out of bed, gritting my teeth.
Anyways, my point is, having experienced this now, this kind of pain that makes you NOT want to live....I get it. I fully support it. You're not living your life when you've got that kind of pain, stopping you from doing something so simple as sit up in bed, or grab a glass of water.
No one should be able to tell you what to do with your life, nor when you are ready to die. If they are ready, let them go in peace, as they want. Its possibly the last bit of power/control they feel they have over their lives as it is.

 

I was wondering how you were making out Settie. Have you tried any of the pretty new anti-nausea meds out there.
If that doesn't help, smoke some weed to help with the side effects of the pain meds. Feel better.

I think sometimes humans can only bear so much and should be given the option to end their pain. But I have known quite a few fighters to the very end.

 

Get better Settie. Soon.