This too is getting out of hand TRANSGENDER(ism)

You live in the south man, that ain't an easy thing to state. This doesn't change my opinion of you in the least, I just know from your background and such that is a big statement. I'm proud you can make it.

Also, I'll totally be shirtless when you pick me up at Dragoncon. What happens at Con, @CinnamonGirl doesn't have to know. *wink* *wink* *nudge* *Nudge*

How you doin'?

 

what happens in ga stays in ga lol

you are correct in the statement.

 

You are totally going to be my big manly bear. Tho if we end up cuddling (required), I have to be the big spoon. I love being the jetpack!

 

Shit, I think I want in on this!

*starts doing lots of push-ups*

 

"Checking your privilege" has nothing to do with being ashamed.
I do wish there were better terms especially since this one has been turned into a swear word.
It's like liberal or how the creationists have completely misinterpreted the word theory in the Theory of Evolution.
I'll give you a couple of examples.

I was going to dinner and a movie with my kiddo.
Every damn time I got out of the car I had to unlock the door and I asked her if she had one of those cars with a kid feature that made it autolock the minute the car went over 10 miles an hour.
She said no, as a young woman she locked the doors the minute she got in the car.
I had to check myself, as a big hairy guy from even saying a word on the subject.
Evaluating the privilege I have as a man to never have to think about that, is important.
Another one, a young woman of color came into my office the other day.
She was looking for an apartment but had no credit, she had cash but was having a hard time finding a place.
My daughter was able get me a place when I had to credit for about the same amount when I had no credit and wasn't even in the state.
Can you guess the big difference?
Hell, she has a college degree and I sure don't.
I can't get mad about these things, I just have to be honest with myself and not make assumptions.

It works the same way with people who have disabilities.
I was talking to a young woman in a wheelchair and she mentioned how hard it was to diet.
Of course, I assumed she was talking about eating right, etc.
No, she was talking about weighing herself.
It meant getting on the bus and going to the hospital so she could use the special scale they have there for people in wheelchairs which takes about three hours out of her day.
Think about that the next time you step on a scale.
Privilege is a weird think we really can't see or feel it.

The best analogy I ever heard for it was comparing it to riding a bike.
When you have a tail wind you can pedal along be sweating and working but not notice the wind.
You are still working, still having to push to get up the hills, nobody is taking that away from you but there is something unseen helping you.
When you have a headwind, even going downhill is a chore and if it never stops every pebble in the road can feel like a boulder.
Systemic racism is a head wind.
You don't feel it, it's not part of your world but it is a constant part of theirs.
It can explain why some folks develop a bit of a chip on their shoulder.

 

we will be waiting

 

deal

 

@redravin That is a very good list of statements about it. I agree with you fully that people are playing the game of life on a "harder" difficulty (my favorite way to put it). I have less monsters in the way, easier checkpoints and the monsters have fewer hit points. I never have denied that, it just seems that the easier the game setting, the less you get to talk about the game.

If I stated that I didn't like this part of the storyline or didn't think the part of the plot was great, I don't want to have the fact I am playing it on "easy" mode thrown in my face. "Fucking casual noob, play it on Very Hard and talk to me later about that boss fight."

Just because I didn't like something in the game, doesn't take away from someone else playing the game at a harder level. Nor should someone look down on me for playing on Easy.

I know people have it worst than me in tons of different ways, but that doesn't mean I don't know about it. Telling me over and over again is just going to piss me off and push me away from trying to understand the different difficulty levels.

 

Amen. My son is trans-male, and I fully support him. Any time I have an opinion on something, related or not, I get the 'check your privilege' crap (though not from him). It pisses me off and makes me want to say fuck off. It serves no purpose to alienate people who might otherwise be convinced of your stance.

I also have a problem with the movement to try and make other people use your personal labels. If you look like a man to someone they are going to address you so. It's not personal, usually. Weird pronouns (though I use them when I know you prefer them) are okay to want to use, but I'm against any kind of legislation that requires others to use them. How many pronouns are we going to end up with?

And speaking of labels, I was mentioning some people I've read about online who call themselves 'lady-boys', and my son said that was genderist. I've met people who call themselves 'trannies'. I answered that these people call themselves that and who was he to make the judgment that they were wrong. Isn't that what we should all want, to be able to call ourselves whatever we want? I'm old and confused, but I'm trying.

The only piece of wisdom I have about labels is that you should be whoever you are, and don't worry about what somebody else thinks or calls you. Their words are not magical and don't change the fact of who you are.